Importance of Healthy Interpersonal Relationships - Essay Example

Healthy Relationships Human beings are naturally social creatures and therefore depriving someone contact with others does not do well in most people. Healthy relationships are important to everyone and take place between individuals and groups. The components of a healthy relationship include honesty, respect, trust, commitment, assertiveness, positive self-esteem, mutual/separate goals and interests, communication, and equality. There are skills that a person can acquire in order to be able to triumph in relationships. There are healthy relationships that allow individuals to bring out the best in each other, but unhealthy relationships hinder growth and make negative effects on each other. Top five skills can help in developing a healthy relationship. They include communication, empathy, and genuine concern for each other, expressing one and fighting fairly, knowing each other has needs, and asserting each other’s rights by honoring and respecting them. Self-esteem means that a person should feel good about him/herself by accepting himself or herself as they are because nobody is perfect. It includes knowing personal strengths, taking control of everything in the entire life, having a positive attitude, and feeling good about the decisions made. Communication is the key to a healthy relationship and requires parties involved to be honest, talk openly about each other’s feelings, taking responsibility of personal feelings, thoughts, and actions, working at resolving conflicts, and listening to each other. No one should run into conclusions, but should enquire for surety and should also avoid criticizing, blaming, or ignoring each other’s ideas or beliefs as explained in Healthy Relationships. Non-healthy relationships Unhealthy relationship involves mean, disrespect, and controlling or abusive behavior. This behavior is normal in some people’s homes because they do not know how to treat each other with kindness and respect as they expect to be treated. This calls for working with a specialized therapist before a person is ready for a relationship. It is not healthy to stay in this kind of relationship. A relationship that does not work out is not a waste of time or failure. This is because every relationship teaches something, and helps people to grow individually. In cases where a relationship does not work completely, a break up is called for. There is a common saying that goes “it is better to break a relationship than a marriage” applicable in this case. When breaking up, choose a safe location and prepare for uncomfortable feelings. One has to be clear, honest, and compassionate and avoid blaming. Walking out without an explanation is disrespectful and this calls for firmness in order to conclude. Sex in relationships In cases concerning sex in a relationship, it is advisable to avoid sex until both parties are ready. It should not make a person feel guilty therefore if one is not comfortable both should wait. It needs discussion in order to know whether everyone is ready. Talk about issues concerning protecting each other by knowing the likes and dislikes of each other. Learn also how to ensure that everyone is comfortable through discussion. Sex done at an appropriate time can lead to intimacy and deepen a relationship, but it can prevent intimacy (Ornish 1999). Love versus infatuation There is a very big difference between love and infatuation. Infatuation means that there is jealousy and mistrust. A person will hang on the other and the partners will have an idealized image. There is also a high level of fear of losing each other and the relationship basis is physical attraction. In infatuation, one person gives more than receiving and one party breaks promises more frequently. The parties depend on the relationship to make them feel important. Love encompasses honesty, respect, and trust. There is mutual giving and receiving and both parties have a balanced interest in other areas of life besides the relationship. Both persons are individuals apart from the relationship; they enjoy spending time together, and feel at ease with each other (Cox 2008). Social connection Social connection in relationships means interacting with each other as friends or relatives. These connections should generate a similar sense of openness, generosity, and good will. Good relationships are part of the greatest blessings human beings have. According to some studies, there may be three of five lower risks of premature death and disease from all causes than those lacking these relationships. A good example is the link of between social connectivity and health as shown by Dr. Dean Ornuish through an interview for reversing heart disease. Many people think this program is about low-fat diets, exercise, and meditation, but he indentifies it as a personal relationship (Cox 2008). The law of attraction The law of attraction is refers to a theory that we create our own realities. We attract things, which we want and do not want. We attract people in our lives, stuff I our homes, and the money we have through our thought and feelings. Limited beliefs leads to attraction of limited wealth thus lead to compromising our own well-being. The sky is the limit if we will believe that anything is possible. We can attract what we want in three steps, which are asking, believing, and receiving. When asking, we should know what we want then truly believe that what we are asking for will be ours. This means that a person should clear all the doubts then become an active player in reaching out the goal he/she has set, so that when opportunity comes, they can grab it without hesitation (Harvey et al. 2005). Theories There are two theoretical approaches to interpersonal relationship. The Newcomb’s Acquaintance Process and Chambliss’ theory of attraction help in testing this study. It is done in a residence hall setting featuring eight people in natural living groups, nine groups of initial strangers, six male and three female, over one eight- week period. The nine groups allow for expansion of the replication by examining inter-group differences, sex differences, and instrument effects. Some data matches Newcomb’s, but also reveal considerable variation between groups unexplainable by the AB-X formulation. This variation leads to more exploration of alternative interpretation of the data and a conclusion that group sub structuring and perceptual judgment interpretations of ambiguous stimuli appears to account for relations previously attributed to the AB-X processes. The most strongly associated variable with attraction at all times is Chambliss’ variable of success, based on an interactional approach (Harvey et al. 2005). Intimacy Intimacy is a close personal connection between two people and it develops as time goes by. Children learn about and develop intimate relationships through interacting with parents and close family members. The process of growing gives opportunities for developing more intimate relationships outside home through getting to know people, establishing commitment and trust, and building connections through work, play, sexual contact, and parenting. The process of creating intimate relationships is never ending and everyone’s experience in growing up and learning about intimacy is different. Cultural beliefs about what a man should stereotypically do and be influences how men understand and relate to intimacy. The traditional man’s role of breadwinning, going out to work in order to provide food and shelter, was dominant. There was little expectation that men should learn about or put energy into developing relationships that are more intimate. Now, everyone is seeking a greater degree of intimacy (Ornish 1999). In conclusion, the processes and theories of attraction, intimacy, love, and healthy interpersonal relationships and the development of intimate relationships across genders are very important in peoples’ social lives. Every person should be responsible in any relationship in order to improve unity, love, and peace among everyone. References Cox, F.D. (2008) Human intimacy: marriage, the family, and its meaning pages, Cengage Learning. Dream-Maker Ministries, (2009) Healthy Relationships: Compatibility and Commitment. Cengage Learning. Harvey, J. H., Sprecher, S. and Wenzel, A. (2005) The Handbook of Sexuality in Close Relationships. Cengage Learning. Ornish, D. (1999) Love and Survival: The Scientific Basis for the Healing Power of Intimacy. Cengage Learning. Read More