Every Problem in Marriage has a Solution - Essay Example

Every Problem in Marriage has a Solution Introduction For writing on a topic, there are certain factors that cannot be negated or ignored and if these factors are ignored or negated, the outcome is a written content that is not persuasive or eye-catching. The writing also becomes erroneous and wrong. The essay, “Every Problem in Marriage has a Solution” contained mistakes when it was written first and a number of amendments were necessary to make it readable and likable. After many corrections and amendments, the essay took a shape that was fair enough. Still, many mistakes and linguistically erroneous sentences are used in it. We can regard an essay linguistically wrong or wrong in other terms on the basis of rules and regulations that are set for writing. For checking the rules regarding writing, Diana Hacker’s book, “Rules for Writers” was used that proved very helpful. This paper contains an analysis of the essay, “Every Problem in Marriage has a Solution” and the analysis is done on two versions of the same essay. One version contains the pointing towards mistakes while the other essay contains corrected mistakes. The essay is checked by the help of rules related to writing. Essay 1 Essay 1 is the erroneous version of the essay, “Every Problem in Marriage has a Solution”. It contains a number of mistakes in it that need to be corrected. For example, the first line of the essay that is, “In modern life, people are being acting too negatively in all the field of life” contains mistakes. In place of “all the field of life”, there should be “all the fields of life” because all is used with plural things and field is not a plural thing. In addition, there are many fields in life not one. Then in the second line that is “They get bored very quick from their cars, houses, and careers”, from is used with bored that is not right. “Bored with” should be used in place of bored from as people get bored with things not from things. “This thing has attacked people personal lives” is also erroneous as there should be “people’s personal lives”. To relate something with someone needs apostrophe s. The sentence, “they begin to look to any disadvantage of marriage” looks incorrect and can be changed into “they begin to look towards the disadvantages of marriage”. The sentence, “Karen Brennan creates a setting that helps send her point of view” can be amended a little by adding to after helps and before send. “The only guy who listens to her, Satan” can be written as “the only guy who listens to her is Satan” because the sentence has ended after this realization, so ‘is’ should be used before Satan and there should be no comma. “Blue to describe the baby nature” should be “blue to describe the baby’s nature”. Apostrophe s should be used because the nature of baby is talked about. “Calls for a help” should not have “a”, only “call for help” is correct. “no one gives her any help tell Satan shows up and relieve the audience by his ears” is quite wrong as there should be “no one gives her any help and Satan shows up and relieves the audience by his ears”. “She acts like if” should have “as” in place of “like”. In this essay, there are many grammatical mistakes that need correction. In place of “she”, he should be used where sharing with wife is described because wives are female while husbands are male and “he” should be used for a husband. “the thing that makes the wife suffers because of the conflicts” should be “this is the thing that makes the wife suffer because of the conflicts between them.” The incident of friend’s yelling needs argument and reasoning as to why it is used in the argument. “his parent's battle” should be “his parents’ battle” because both the parents affect the child adversely. “Solutions are being proposed all over the world” should be used and in should be removed from the sentence. The sentence that “wife isn’t just a member of the family” needs authorial name, as it is not said by anyone else but by the author of the story. Lastly, in the works cited list, the reference of “Floating” is not given that needs to be added and also the structure of the given references is not correct. The second line should be indented slightly not the first line and also the list of cited works should be in alphabetical manner. Essay 2 The second version of the essay is the one in which, the somehow corrected form of essay can be found. The sentences that are highlighted are added after going through the first version of the essay. There were many mistakes of language and structure in the first version and an attempt was done in order to correct those mistakes. However, it cannot be said that the second version is free from any defects at all. For example, the sentence, “The women in “Floating” are trying to get her husband’s attention” is wrong, as it should be “the women in “Floating” are trying to get their husbands’ attention”. Women is plural and should not have “her” but “their” and “husband’s attention is incorrect as there are two husbands, not one. In place of “couple”, couples should be used as, “are” is used afterwards that indicates that the sentence is about more than one couple. The second paragraph of the essay needed some clarification as for which wife, husband, backroom and house, the talk is about. “Both of the husband's behavior make the audience feel helpless toward the wife as well as annoyed because of the husband's treatment” should be changed into “The husband’s behavior makes the audience helpless towards the wife as well as annoyed”. The sentence has too many words that are not necessary. In addition, the structure of the sentence is wrong. “As” should be used after “The backroom acts” because backroom is used as a simile for the memories of the couple. “the thing that makes the wife suffers because of the conflicts” should be “this is the thing that makes the wife suffer because of the conflicts between them.” A backing argument is given at the end of the paragraph in which, friend’s yelling is described because the given examples should be backed by enough argumentation and explanation. At different places in the essay, justification with the help of authorial writing was needed that was added. For an academic writing, it is essential to prove the claims by means of authorial quotations and examples from the text. This makes the writing persuasive. Conclusion Hence, after analyzing the two versions of the essay, “Every Problem in Marriage has a Solution”, it is quite clear that still the essay needs revisions and improvement because all the mistakes are still not corrected. This fact cannot be denied that the second version of the essay is better than the first one because it follows more language and grammatical rules than the first one. In addition, the structure of the second version of the essay is a lot better than the first one. Writing cannot be done in one attempt only. It needs drafting and continuous revisions until the written content is eye-catching and persuasive. There should be proper authorial quotes and examples from the text in order to make sure that whatever is written is to the point and well proved. Works Cited L1: Reading to form an interpretation L1-a: Reading actively L1-b: Forming an interpretation L2: Planning the paper L2-a: Drafting a thesis L2-b: Sketching an outline L3: Writing the paper L3-a: Drafting an introduction L3-b: Supporting your interpretation; avoiding simple plot summary L4: Observing the conventions of literature papers L4-a: Referring to authors, titles, and characters L4-b: Using the present tense L4-c: Using MLA style to cite and format quotations L5: Integrating quotations from the work L5-a: Distinguishing between the author and a narrator or speaker L5-b: Creating a context for a quoted passage L5-c: Avoiding shifts in tense L5-d: Indicating changes in a quotation: using brackets and the ellipsis mark L5-e: Enclosing embedded quotations in single quotation marks L6: Using secondary sources L6-a: Documenting sources L6-b: Avoiding plagiarism L7: Sample papers Writing about Literature Resources Hacker, Diana. Rules for Writers. 6th Ed. USA: Bedford/St. Martin's, 2007. Read More