Commitment and Its Theorized Determinants in Relations - Essay Example

Benjamin Le and Christopher R. Agnew suggest that most commitments are based on the assumption that intent to continue with or dissolve a relationship is a function of those factors drawing one toward the partnership in conjunction with influences moving the individual away from the partnership (Le et al., 37). The idea of personal commitment is to invest in a relationship, to improve its quality, not only to continue it. It can be called “the most important construct in investigating relational processes” (Le et al., 52). All agreements and commitments could be described as “an integral component of the possibility of relationship repair” (Waldron et al., 724). The harder the relationship is for both partners, the greater the likelihood of rupture.

The essence of romantic and family relationships lies in constant concessions and agreements of both sides - partners originally had several own small habits that both of them have to consider and respect now. Personal commitment may be characterized by an attraction to the partner, attraction to the relationship, and the identity of “husband-wife” relations. The satisfaction level also plays a huge role in this aspect. Mostly all of them are directed to preserve or even enhance relationships.

Superficial or deep, commitment is always the foundation of a truly loving relationship. Serious commitment does not guarantee success in relations but helps to strengthen them more than any other factor. However, there is an opposite side to the problem of commitments. Some people call it the “fear of commitment”, rather it should be called a fear of losing oneself in a relationship. A huge component of avoiding serious relationships is a hidden need to maintain a sense of personal freedom and individuality.

Moral commitment can be described simply with words – “ought to stay”. It is based on the person`s dedication. The reasons can vary: one can worry about divorce, have a sense that he or she has some obligations to the partner, or pay attention to some consistent values, like “until the death part us”. I think that moral commitment can grow into a constraint. Each person has his limit of forces – she or he can tolerate, forgive and respect the partner for a very long time, but the moment will come when life would seem unbearable. It does not matter whether the relationship would be broken or there would be adultery - in any case, attitudes and feelings will be weakened.

Constraint commitment is considered to have a low impact than the two types it was written above, but it is described as a trap for relations. These relationships are often mounted on financial stability, and sometimes on the problems in finding another partner. A particularly strong influence on this aspect has social pressure from relatives, friends, neighbors, and co-workers. For example, for a woman with a baby, it is easier to stay with a man than to be a “single mother”. Another example, the division of property after divorce: both partners are so afraid of litigation that they have agreed to continue the appearance of cordial relations. Constraint commitment is one that inhibits feelings.

Thus, commitments influence human relationships, but according to one`s concrete priorities. The basic idea of strong, long, and equal relations is in sincerity and trust, mutual understanding, and strength not to succumb to difficulties. It is achieved empirically and with the force of the senses.