Problems People Have with Intimacy and Relationships - Essay Example

The Issues or Problems People have with Intimacy and Relationships Relationship or relationships is divided intointerpersonal relationship, intimate relationship and ethical relationship. Interpersonal relationships are the connection, affiliations or social associations that exist among two or more people. Intimate relationship is about being emotionally close to someone who is your partner. It’s about being able to share and accept partners feelings, being their when needed. Intimate relationship involves sexual intercourse among the partners. Communication is by far the most commonly reported relationship issue that cuts across the form of relationships. Communication problem mainly presents itself as Misunderstanding. Even with the growth of technology through which different forms of communication can be used, communication is still a problem among relationship. This is commonly experience when a person or a group chooses not to take into consideration other's views as opposed to not understanding their suggestions. One party is unwilling to honestly care and listen to understand other part point of view hence communication problem. People form any kind of relationship with certain expectations, and over a given period of time they feel disappointed due to unfulfilled expectations. This causes feeling of disappointment over and over that they have not been met. For instance, a man and woman in an intimacy relationship can have different expectations of the future of the relationship in one years’ time .The woman would have wished the man to propose for marriage but the man does not this is sad for the woman. Even in a marriage the couples expect to have children of their own but due to infertility of either the man or the woman they are unable to. This causes problem I the relationship. Sex and intimacy is among the common causes of conflict in many relationships. The presence or luck of intimacy in a relationship reflects the state of a relationship. This occurs not independently, sex and intimacy conflict mostly occurs from other issues such as misunderstanding causing hostility and withholding of sex from either a man or a woman. This is mostly a form of defense or punishment. Serious loss of intimacy in a relationship is manifested mainly from dashed expectations and chronic disappointments. The situation is worsened in a case were the partner are not ready to air the issues and be frank to their partners about their expectations. In case there is no intimacy simply because of the friendship the partners share then it is expressed also in the bedroom Alcoholism and other illegal drugs use is among the problems facing the relationships since time memorial up to date. In a case where one partner or both partners are alcoholic there intimate relationship is affected. Alcohol leads to other abuses such as verbal, emotional and even physical abuse. There are still cases where pregnant women drink and use illegal drugs. This causes problem in a relationship as the pregnant mother endangers the life of unborn child. High level of consumption also affects work ethics of a person. This will highly likely affect ones performance particularly at work. Some a partner can loss their career or jobs due to alcohol abuse and other illegal drugs. Another problem to intimacy relationship is the sexual transmitted diseases. With infidelity from one partner or both the partners are highly exposed to transmitted diseases especially when there was no use of proactive measure. Also some chronic illness such as cancer tends to reduce intimacy in a relationship. This can be through sympathy from the healthy partner for fear of heating him/her in the process. Unresolved baggage mainly from youthful age is the main cause of misunderstanding in a relationship. For instance early marriage for a woman or a man will force the person to mature so fast before getting to pass though his or her youthful age. This can cause resentments to the partners for the time missed to be young and the roles taken as a parent instead. In addition resentments are also cause of conflicts in a relationship. Resentments occurs when one party undermines the trust, love and the mutual respect one once had for each other. This is a slow killer of a relationship. It is important to uncover and treat this critical issue. They are mainly unspoken or unknown issue. The persons in a relationship ought to play a major role in discovering the role they played in causing the resentments and way to improve themselves and give suggestion on how they would like the other person in a relationship to do in order to resolve the conflicting issue. People still blame the other person in such cases; instead people should be just responsible for their action no matter positive or negative ones. This is because it takes two to tangle. As communication diminishes, unfulfilled expectation piles up and old hurts and disappointments (especially from young years) are triggered resentments crops up faster in the present relationship. This is common yet unknown source of pain in relationship especially in marriage at the present days. Triggers bear a resemblance from the past conflicts weather hurt, abandonment or treatment (ill treatment) caused by the current experience. Mainly they are not consciously. Also Infidelity is the main killer of trust and commitment in a relationship. This normally occurs as a result of relationship break down rather than as a cause of break down. People who are fulfilled and content in a relationship especially marriage, virtually they certainly not ever look outside to get pleasure. This still goes on as affairs are used as way to lick ones wound to escape from the main issue in a current relationship. Infidelity adds more pain and suffering to the relationship rather than solving the conflict that previously existed. With the increase rate of divorce currently in the country it shows the issue still exists in the societies and especially in relationships. Last but not least is the financial constraint. The burden or responsibility of providing for the family can also take tall on the intimate relationship. With the rise in the cost of living in the country one needs to work extra hard in order to provide a decent living condition of the family. Constant travel of one partner or both puts a strain in the relationship hence the work extra hard finding little or no time for intimacy. This can easy leads to infidelity. The responsibility of working hard to provide, food, clothing, shelter proper education and other secondary wants such as entertainment cause problems in the relationship in cases when the partners do not agree on the issue. In conclusion these are certainly not all of the troubles that befall us in a relationship. However, they are the most common that seem universal too. Faced by this issues they also give us a chance to be informed about ourselves and others particularly the ones we are in a relationship with. This can open up opportunity for a better relationship that we might have not known about previously. This issues as much as are of negative impact in one’s relationship they are not entail negative as they help people in a relationship to know more about themselves and other people concerned. Personal growth is no exemption, and no matter how small or big a problem is in a relationship the better way of solving it is to take responsibility for our action and words spoken and not always be quick to point fingers. All kinds of relationship have their issues so it’s up to the parties’ involved to be willing and ready to invest themselves in what it takes to have it loving and satisfactory relationship. Works Cited Gershuny (eds.) The Social and Political Economy of the Household. Oxford, Oxford University Press, 2010.Print Read More