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This essay discusses interpersonal communication which directs the manner through which a person will interact with the other, and there are two potential outcomes in this. Communication is directed by human feelings, which determine to a large extent the way that one applies in communicating…
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Analysis of Interpersonal Communication
Week one
Interpersonal communication directs the manner through which a person will interact with the other, and there are two potential outcomes in this; positive or negative. On its part, communication is directed by human feelings, which determine to a large extent the way that one applies in communicating. This coincides with Petersen (2007) who states that “I prefer to think of feelings as pure energy. As with the gasoline in a tank, we can choose to use the power to drive a hurt youngster to hospital or to run over someone” (p. 13). This quote guides the interpretation of interpersonal communication that I recently came across.
One need I have come to realize from my readings is that many people; including me lack of them is controlling our interpersonal interaction by controlling our feelings (Burley-Allen, 1995). This I got from my exploration of literatures concerned with this discipline wherein I discovered that we cannot control what emotions we have. This was supported by all the resources I went through. The solutions they were offering were that one should not try to create the emotions they needed, but should devise means of steering their current emotions positively. In this, I reflected back on the teachings I had received from Sunday school lessons that no matter how “wrong” someone treated me, I was not supposed to fight them back.
The literatures (and memories of my childhood lessons) intertwined in supporting that our emotions may push us to act in particular ways, but it is upon one to redirect the “energy” in ways that do not cause trouble, or breach the rules of communication (Stewart, 2012). In this, I realized that the manner through which I react to people when they approach me matters a lot, not only to me, but to them as well (Carbonell, 2008). In short, if someone asks for some assistance when I tend to be busy, I can either talk them into seeing the sense why I would not be able to assist the, or react in a manner that will make them to never ask me for any help in future. Concisely, interpersonal communication depends largely on one’s ability to control their emotions.
Week two
“Communication is the lubrication designed to keep the functions of our stomach, heart, and head working separately together” (Petersen, 2007 p. 16). Petersen simply implied that for interpersonal communication to be termed as effective, it has to cater for three contexts of a human; the stomach, heart, and head. The stomach has to be catered for in that the communication offered should put one’s feelings into words. The heart has to express openness in words, and finally the head should weigh one’s words or actions in terms of what effect they will have on the receptor.
The above rule contains information, which dares one to really consider their actions or ways of expressing themselves to others. It did challenge me. In my understanding, it is all about doing unto others what we would expect from them. With the fact in mind that communication is meant to create understanding and not create distances between people, I realized that many people unknowingly misuse communication (Carbonell, 2008). If it is used in any other means apart from creating some understanding between people, then it should not be called communication. This was a theory stated by most of the resources I encountered.
The readings prove that interpersonal communication is deeper than it seems, and that it one should consider a lot when interacting with others. The insight from the resources can be simplified that if something does not feel right in one’s stomach, head, or heart, then giving it to another person is wrong (Stewart, 2012). As such, sharing what would be best for us with others is what defines positive interpersonal communication.
References
Burley-Allen, M. (1995). Listening: The forgotten skill: A self-teaching Guide (2nd ed.). New York: John Wiley & Sons.
Carbonell, M. (2008). How to solve the people puzzle: Understanding personality patterns. Blue Ridge, GA.
Petersen, J. C. (2007). Why don’t we listen better? Communicating and connecting in relationships. Petersen Publications.
Stewart, J. (2012). Bridges Not Walls: A Book about Interpersonal Communication (11th ed.). McGraw Hill. Read More
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