Why Humans Need More Effective Communication - Research Paper Example

Effectiveness for Better Life   It is without question that personal habits are integrally important and powerful factors, which work to shape our lives.  These personal habits are oftentimes translated into thoughts that are then disseminated through the language of communication.  As a result, the need for effective communication becomes painfully obvious.  As such, the way we communicate will develop and define our behavior and eventually develop into differing types of habits.  Accordingly, one’s habits become one’s personality and a window to a person’s character.  Therefore, effective communication invariably touches every part of our lives. In this brief analysis, the author will attempt to explain the different areas that effectiveness and optimism is used daily and without detection.  First we will look at some characteristics of effective habits, and how these habits become our behaviors along with some tools for learning and implementing effective behaviors for our lives. Second, the analysis will reinforce some positive optimistic values and views that will solidify the process of a better life. Thirdly, the author will explain why motivation is a key factor in renewing one’s effective habits for their future.  In conclusion, I will reinforce the need for effective habits and the motivations behind them, which result in an optimistic lifestyle.         We are what we repeatedly do, Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit. Aristotle         Effectiveness may be defined as – the quality of being able to bring about a required result.  As such, one excellent tool for learning effectiveness could be seen in Stephen Covey's book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.  This book gives individuals the tools to help them understand how to be more effective, explains the positive benefits of effectiveness, and describes some overall character traits that result from an effective person. Many of these examples extant in Covey's book refer to overall principles of conduct.  As such, discipline is discussed at length and the link between a principled lifestyle, discipline, and the growth and development of an effective lifestyle is revealed. Invariably results of implementation of these factors will lead to better leadership, better parenting, and fuller and more complete powers of effective persuasion.  Additionally, individuals who espouse the traits of effective persuasion are often attributed as being trustworthy and dependable.  Of course, from an analytical perspective it is difficult to differentiate which came first and what traits led to the development of others; however, for purposes of this analysis, it will be assumed that being an effective person helps to mold and foster the development of these ancillary character traits.         Likewise, planning and organizing are necessary attributes that augment overall effectiveness in one’s life. For example, in basic everyday life all people perform a mode of planning whether it is in the office or the home.  Additionally, planning and organizational skills are not only required for work but must be carried out in a number of interpersonal and day-to-day interactions as well as life choices and decisions to include: decisions to get married, raise a family, and determine and plan the future of one’s life. (Nickols, 1986) These basic preparational skills used over 20 years ago remain relevant and pertinent in today’s marriage planning needs.  Accordingly, most young couples go through a series of marriage question and answer sessions usually completed with the pastor or officiating individual who is in charge of guiding and providing a supportive environment for the process of preparing to embark upon a lifetime together.  Likewise, the couple's may require help with communication and/or relationship issues - such as dealing with personal finances and how children are to be raised. In the end the basic idea is to have a successful marriage, a happy family, well-adjusted, prepared children.         Accordingly, it is necessary for lists need to be made and steps taken in order to ensure that one item is completed so that the next may begin.  Therefore, one of Covey's primary recommendations is that one begins with the end goal in mind.  With this particular mindset, the steps, which need to be outlined on how one wish to complete tasks in order to realize a specific goal, is evident.  If a person begins a goal thinking backwards, and realizing what steps need to be taken to obtain this goal, the goal overall has a much higher likelihood of overall success.  Cantor and Harlow have the following to say concerning such attributes, “The ability to analyze one’s goals, determine a strategic plan for problem solving and adjust our behaviors for the projected outcome is a very powerful trait to posses. But knowing we can also exercise this ability and plan in patterned ways to accomplish our goals takes work and determination” (Cantor, Harlow).         One particular step oriented program is the 12-step program used extensively and to a great deal of success by Alcoholics Anonymous.  The program is designed for the members to go through each and every step one by one to reach their goals to accomplish the peace of mind and understanding/realization of what a detriment to their own lives as well as others their addiction has caused.  These steps encourage member to look at areas of their own life they may not have given much consideration to before as a means of evoking a realization and response that will likely further motivate the individual to put away their addiction completely and entirely. Alcoholics Anonymous own mission statement is indicative of this process; it reads: “Alcoholics Anonymous® is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from alcoholism.” With this program there is a great emphasis placed on list making and inventory searches where an individual is required to write down who, what, when, and where they believe they may have ever harmed another. Also make a list of items within their own lives that they would like to see change. These steps help the alcoholic and also the people they have affected, maybe family members or coworkers begin to understand that this is a disease it is an addiction, and that there is a process that can help a person break this addiction.         Once a person has decided to make changes in their life through a variety of mechanisms, both the ones listed above and a plethora of others, the importance of a healthy and positive perspective and outlook comes into full focus.  Accordingly, optimism is a very powerful tool when it comes to life-changing decisions. Optimism is also a great necessity to achieve the type of positive expressions needed to complete one’s overall effectiveness. There are several benefits that come from optimism, not only greater achievements in your business world, but also greater achievements on a personal level whether it be family friends or just trying to increase your personal emotional health. In an article from 2010 entitled “Advances in Management” performed at Grand Valley State University, the researchers discovered what was long believed to be true; that optimism is a powerful medicine. Researchers studied nearly 100,000 women over 8 years tracking how many heart attacks they suffered and how long they lived. What was the conclusion? The optimistic women had 16 percent lower risk of having heart attacks, which have a direct link with better health. The article continues to state that optimists have a healthier immune system and also a better ability to cope with physical pain and a much quicker recovery from heart surgery combined with a reduced likelihood of re-hospitalizations. Another positive side of being an optimist is they generally expect good things to happen and work towards those ideals. Also, people exhibiting a can-do attitude by exercising, meditations, and giving up destructive behaviors such as smoking or drinking in excess can improve lives. All these positive optimistic attitudes can give people less chance of heart disease or developing high blood pressure. In effect, being an optimistic person can help you live a longer and healthier lifestyle.         I was very blessed to have an exceptional woman as one of my cohort partners.  She had just recently recovered from breast cancer when we began our cohort in August of 2010. When I first met Miss Romelia Gonzales, she seemed like such a positive outgoing individual; we became fast friends and were always in groups together. As I got to know her more I learned of her breast cancer recovery.  Most remarkable was the fact that she never complained or blamed anything or anyone for anything that ever happened to her.  Even though her life was marked by a series of difficulties, she explained to me that she went through her divorce just as she had found her breast cancer; she never used her hardships as an opportunity to complain about the course of events that had shaped her life. The strength that she had to muster to deal with this very deadly disease along with the heartbreak of the divorce is a testament to her positive optimistic attitude. I know from experience that many people who have been through the Fresno Pacific cohort program have come out of these groups with some truly wonderful friendships.  As we neared our final months of our cohort, Romie was suffering from some vertigo issues. Suffering from some of the same issues of vertigo myself I offered as much information as I had, even giving her some exercises that were given to me by a physician from my past. As the weeks passed, her vertigo continued to worsen.  I explained to her I did not think it was vertigo and could be something more serious.  As such, the exercises I had given her did not work and she was also experiencing extreme nausea. Finally one weekend her condition worsened and checked herself into the emergency room at Clovis community Hospital. It was at this point that she found out she had a brain tumor. Unbelievably she was extremely poised, positive, and optimistic that she could beat this too. She told me she cried one tear, and then asked the doctor what is the plan of attack. Needless to say she did not finish the last few months with our cohort and she was missed dramatically. Several surgeries later, radiation and some chemotherapy, she returned to work. We both graduated together in May of 2012. We were both allowed to walk in the ceremony, I still needed to finish a few units, and she was allowed to go ahead and graduate, because of her condition. The determination and positive optimistic attitude that she showed me, someone who had been through two major life-altering diseases and still be able to push-through everyday life. She has been the focus and person behind this paper of research, which shows that your effectiveness as a person as well as your determination to overcome has a profound impact on the ability of individuals to achieve their goals, and is truly a blessing from God.         As evidenced in Hebrews 11: 1-2, optimistic faith can be learned: “Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.  This is what the ancients were commended for”.  The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation under everything is what makes life worth living. It's our handle on what we cannot see. The act of faith is what distinguished the disciples and set them above the crowd as an example of what proper Christianity should entail.  We see here that we are in charge of our convictions and we have the power within us to overcome, stay positive, being optimistic at whatever difficult or trying life situations that we are faced with. Another great quote from a person who was ahead of his time. “ Whether you say you can, or whether you say you can’t, you’re right!” Henry Ford         Motivation is defined as the process that initiates, guides and maintains goal- oriented behaviors. Motivation is what causes us to act, whether it is getting a glass of water to reduce thirst or reading a book to gain knowledge.    Motivation involves the biological, emotional, social and cognitive forces that activate behavior. In everyday usage, the term motivation is frequently used to describe why a person does something.         Ask any person, what moves them to act? And you will get a million different answers. This is why motivation is different for each person. Motivation has a separate meaning and or feeling for every individual.      According to psychology professor Abraham Maslow, “Motivation relates to a range of psychological processes that guide an individual toward a goal and cause that person to keep pursuing that goal.”  Likewise, motivation often is described in terms of direction, intensity, and persistence. For example, direction of motivation would be your choice of a particular activity over another; however, intensity would be a level of pursuit with regards to how difficult the activity or the goal is.  Lastly, persistence references how long a person will continue with the behavior in the face of obstacles that provide a deterrent to accomplishing a given goal?(Sadri & Bowen, 2011)  Maslow’s theory involves a hierarchy of needs. These particular needs are used to identify the fundamental personal motivations. The most basic of needs usually are met first.  These therefore include the physiological needs such as hunger, thirst, and shelter. Secondly, security and protection are next in the list of needs that humans endeavor to fulfill.  These needs are concentric around the needs for safety (oftentimes relating to employment and wages) and a stable place to live. Thirdly on the list of hierarchical human needs are the social needs.  These would include but are not limited to establishing and maintaining a sense of belonging and love within respective groups and/or communities in which the individual is likely to interact. This desire to belong, whether it's belonging to a company, an organization, or most a family, has been evidenced since the dawn of written history.  In fact the desire to belong likely provides a great deal of explanation to the pursuit of the other three previous needs that have been listed. Next on the hierarchy is self-esteem; this may be described as the internal need for recognition, reward and status. The need for self-esteem is important for a person to feel responsible; it also helps to build a good reputation as it encourages the individual to strive beyond what they might do normally to provide a superior product.   When recognition and respect are received from one’s peers, this can lead to better self-confidence and eventually increased productivity. When employers recognize their employees for accomplishments, projects are more often completed on time and employees, overall productivity is likely to increase.  As such, an appreciated employee is a productive employee. People desire to feel challenged and have opportunities to advance. If vertical advancement is not possible then some employers used other motivation tools such as parking spaces, gas cards, and tickets to special events, to keep employees happy. The fifth element of Maslow's hierarchy is the need for self–actualization, which can also be explained as the need of self-fulfillment or, “be the best you can be”. Employers try to inspire their employees to perform at their highest levels possible, this example is another use of Maslow’s last layer of the hierarchy, thus increasing productivity and creating a more profitable business.         I performed a personal interview with a sixteen year-old young lady regarding her motivations to lose weight and get in shape.   Accordingly, a Miss Shelby Hayden, a student at Clovis West High School, agreed to grant me a personal interview. She explained how she began over summer break by adopting a regime that involved both running and regular trips to her local gym. Her mother bought a Malibu Pilates machine, and so she regularly began to do perform these workouts as well. She told me her motivation was that the running was not targeting certain parts of her body.  The Pilates gave her the results on the outside she was also looking for on the inside. The feeling of a job well done, and as long as she was on a good diet she started building muscle and the fat started to come off.         She showed me how the program comes with a big chart with all the moves in the workouts, combined into six DVDs and a couple booklets. The DVDs are different workouts ranging from 20 minutes up to an hour in overall length.  Additionally, the instructions that she followed suggested different routines that she perform in order to reach her goals.         She much preferred the Pilates program because it was not boring and she was able to achieve a varied and intense workout without the need to regularly attend the gym. Shelby stated, “I always feel well worked out, but never pushed to my limit, it might be a struggle using muscles I barely would use, but it never leaves me heaving for air like running does.  And after the workouts I feel more tightness in my abs, thighs, etc. I can honestly say, for me, if I work hard to be dedicated, it can make a big difference.”         Shelby goes on to explain that to be able to do all the workouts, one has to have some coordination skills. For example, you have to lie on the machine, balance, and perform the workout all simultaneously. In one of the exercises she showed me, you lean forward with your hands in front of you on the machine, balance your feet on the springs and lift yourself.  In this exercise the abs and core are most concentrated on and strengthened. “The machine itself”, Shelby says, “is kind of heavy and folds to go under a bed or wherever and it does not take up much space.” She put the machine together herself without any special tools being required.  Shelby continued about the cost not being “too much”, and that her mother had made payments.  She finished with this quote, “all in all, if you are willing to be sore and dedicate yourself, I think it will make a difference.” In the western United States, it is difficult to not be familiar with the name Anthony Robbins. An excerpt from a biography written about him states: “Anthony Robbins has devoted more than half his life to helping people discover and develop their own unique qualities of greatness. Considered the nation's leader in the science of peak performance, he is the founder and chairman of the Anthony Robbins Companies, which are committed to assisting people in achieving personal and professional mastery. Robbins has served as a peak performance consultant for the executives of such organizations as IBM, AT&T, American Express, McDonnell-Douglas, and the United States Army, as well as professional sports teams such as the Los Angeles Dodgers, the Los Angeles Kings, the America America's Cup team, and gold medal-winning Olympic athletes. Robbins also provides ongoing coaching and consulting to a number of prominent world figures and is the primary advisor in the re-engineering efforts of several organizations and even communities. Robbins' special passion is to make the world a better place to live by assisting individuals in captaining their destinies, whether that means fostering their relationships with their families, directing their focus to achieve their goals, relieving emotional or financial distress, or making profound contributions to their communities and country. Throughout the years he has unselfishly given his energy and resources to those in need, and in 1991 he formed a nonprofit foundation to aid underprivileged children, homeless individuals, senior citizens, and the prison population.” A further quote from Anthony Robbins himself helps to shed light on the powers of motivation he espouses and the rigor of his ideals that have prompted him to such a life of service. “What is the difference between those who succeed — who thrive mentally, emotionally, physically and financially, even in the most difficult times — and those who are suffering? Successful individuals take a different quality of action. They have a different quality of thinking and emotion that guides their actions and gets them to follow through. They question how to get motivated. They feed their minds with the best-quality personal development products, tools, strategies, information and inspiration available. Most of all, they are hungry. They never stop. Their focus is on how to create and maintain momentum. With that kind of drive, they will always succeed. Extraordinary lives—lives of joy, impact, achievement, contribution, and distinction—are achieved not by willpower or mere "motivation," but by accessing the tools and information that will give you the true competitive edge. But where do such driven individuals find the highest quality tools and strategies that are the best food for their hungry minds?” (Robbins Research Intl 2011). “Things do not change, we change.” Henry David Thoreau In conclusion, it is without question that for the reasons discussed at length in this analysis governing effective communication as it relates to motivation are key forces with regards to interpersonal interaction as well as goal achievement. As shown, these integral forces have profound effects internally with regards to success and personal as well as spiritual enrichment, as well as having the secondary effect of successfully attaining people’s trust and understanding in a host of matters. Accordingly, understanding the role that motivation and effective communication plays on the outcomes and interpersonal relationships we develop as human beings on a daily basis helps to give a clear and concise view of just how important honing these skills are as related to living a happy and complete life. As such, this analysis has shown that efficient habits combined with effective communication directly fosters life-altering concepts that have positive spill-over effects into many other aspects of one’s life. Accordingly, it should be a matter of great importance to everyone to work diligently to foster habits that will ensure they build the personality traits necessary to engage people in a positive and constructive manner all the while working to uplift and motivate everyone through effective and powerful communication. References Alcoholics Anonymous World Services Inc., (2012) by the A. A. Grapevine Retrieved from: http://www.aa.org/lang/en/subpage.cfm?page=1 Augusto-Landa, J., Pulido-Martos, M., & Lopez-Zafra, E. (2011). Does Perceived Emotional Intelligence and Optimism/pessimism Predict Psychological Well-being? Journal Of Happiness Studies, 12(3), 463-474.     doi:10.1007/s10902-010-9209-7 Cantor, N., Harlow, R. ”Personality, Strategic Behavior, and Daily-Life Problem Solving”. Current Directions in Psychological Science, Vol. 3, No. 6 (Dec., 1994), pp. 169-172 Available online: http://www.jstor.org/stable/20182302 Gallo, Carmine. (2011) The 7 Success Principles of Steve Jobs Retrieved from http://www.forbes.com/sites/carminegallo/2011/01/04/the-7-success-principles-of-steve-jobs/ Hall, L. (2000). Dragon slaying: from dragons to princes: meta-stating dragon states. Clifton, CO: Neuro-Semantics. Hayden, Shelby (2012) Personal interview Meyer, B., & Garcia-Roberts, L. (2007). Congruence between reasons for depression and motivations for specific interventions. Psychology & Psychotherapy: Theory, Research & Practice, 80(4), and 525-542. doi: 10.1348/147608306X169982 Nickels, S., Fournier, D. “Evaluation of a Preparation for Marriage Workshop” Family Relations, Vol. 35, No. 4 (Oct., 1986), pp. 563-571. Available online: http://www.jstor.org/stable/584518         Robbins, A. (2011) Robbins Research International retrieved from http://www.tonyrobbins.com Robbins, A. (2000). Baker & Taylor Author Biographies, 1. http://www.biography.com/people/henry-david-thoreau-9506784 SADRI, G., & BOWEN, R. (2011). Meeting EMPLOYEEE requirements: Maslow's hierarchy of needs is still a reliable guide to motivating staff. Industrial Engineer: IE, 43(10), 44-48. Seckinger, J., Langerak, B., Mishra, J., & Mishra, B. (2010). Optimism and Longevity. Advances In Management, 3(3), 32-39. The Message – Hebrews 11:1-2. Retrieved from http://www.biblegateway.com Read More