Interpersonal Conflict - Essay Example

Life is a never ending journey in which people are constantly exposed to situations in which they face some type of friction or conflict. These frictions are known by scholars as interpersonal conflict. These situations can manifest themselves in any facet of a person’s life which includes his / her workplace, home life, school or elsewhere. Interpersonal conflict can be defined as something that exists anytime we would prefer to do something but give in to others and we do something else, or simply avoid confronting others which is also a type of conflict. This paper analyzes four conflicting situations I have encounter in my life and it also provides other feedback on the subject. The definition for interpersonal conflict is bit narrow as far not including other types of internal conflicting aspects of ones humanity such as feelings and thoughts. A person may endure a personal conflict such as being in love with someone who does not know the feeling one has for the other person. Staying quiet about the matter or revealing the truth to that person is a source of person conflict in my opinion. In general I support the author’s definition and it will be used as a baseline for our discussion of various personal conflicts. One of conflicting discussed in this paper involved a team learning experience. The first personal conflict situation to be depicted occurred to me last year in team setting school learning set-up for a college course. I was part of five member team that had to write a term paper and provide a five minute presentation of our findings to the classroom. The team was a mess from day one. Everybody had a different opinion on how to handle the situation and attack the problem at hand. We got nothing accomplished in our first two one hour meetings other than everyone hating on each other. It was an absolute mess, by the time we started on third meeting I had to open my mouth up and let everyone know that we continued on this path we would all fail. I would say that friction and some type of conflict is inevitable when student or co-workers get together in team settings, but what was occurring in our team was a debacle early on. The destructive early conflict help some of team member get motivated to work. Two people volunteered to do all research and writing and another person said they would do the presentation. Suddenly a horrible team turned around and became a marvel of efficiency. I believe that the conflict the team faced early on help turn things around and proved to be motivating factor. The conflict was destructive early because it did not provide a good platform for communication since everyone was talking at different wavelengths. The destructive conflict helped wake the team up in the latter stages of the game and allowed for unity to occur when team members were able to work as independent units to create final output. We received a grade of B on the project from our professor which is not bad considering the early dilemmas. The second conflicting situation occurred in a place I work in a few years ago. I was worked as clerk for office of engineers. There was an information leakage that reached all employees concerning the intentions of the boss of hiring someone on the basis of preferential treatment. The cousin of one of the bosses was about to graduate and was going to receive a job opening me and few of my co-workers were applying too. We were told originally that the position would be filled in-house and only if an outstanding candidate came would be given to somebody outside the internal circle. I applying for the position with hopes of landing the job, even though I knew some of my co-workers had better credentials. Everyone work very hard for during that month the job opening was available, but in the end the cousin of the boss got the job. It was very disappointing since our boss completely denied the rumor that the position would be given to the cousin of one of the top bosses. The situation was destructive because it destroyed the moral of the workers who lost all trust in the word and actions of their superiors. During the trial period people were working extra hard trying to impress the boss, and then suddenly a recent graduate who happens to be the cousin of one the key manager gets the job. A good thing that came out of the conflict was the workers united more than ever during the emotional rollercoaster and people work at higher levels during the period they were being evaluated which help some workers realize their hidden potential. A third conflict I have encountered that represents a source of interpersonal conflict involves a difference of opinion concerning a parking spot in my neighborhood. Every house has an allocated garage which provides two parking spot. My neighbor has four cars and a mobile home. The person is constantly taking away my parking spots without asking for prior permission. The person was invading my personal space so was inevitable that a conflict was going to occur among us. I tried not to say anything, but when the person suddenly bought another car and utilized another one of my parking spaces then it was too much for me to handle. I had tried to stay away from the conflict, but it was inevitable. By keeping quiet I had given the person the opportunity to step all over me. When I talked to the person he admitted he was wrong, but told me he kept stealing my parking spots because I did not say anything. After speaking he told he would start parking his cars in his front yard since his yard was a bit messed up anyways. By me keeping quiet in the past I had become more frustrated which was a counterproductive action. Once I spoke my mind and confronted my neighbor a resolution to the problem was achieve instantly which meant that me speaking out was a productive action. I was very satisfied with the resolution to the conflict and I learned from this experience that the best course of action is to keep the lines of communication open. The fourth conflicting situation I am going to talk involved the workplace. I worked for a company in which among my job duties included doing trip liquidations for employees, suppliers, and other vendors. The company provided different trip allowance incentives and other cash reimbursements. The procedure to liquidate took as long as six months to complete. One time I received an offer from a client who offered me a hundred dollar bill if I promised to process his claim within two weeks. The person was supposed to receive $2200 from his trip liquidation. In essence I had just received a bribe. When it occurred I told the person that I could not accept his money and that the process took over four months no matter what I did. In reality I lied to the person, if I wanted I could have looked for his file and process his claim next. In reality nobody supervised my work so I could have done the person a favor and made a quick $100 if I wanted. The problem was that if I had accepted the bribe I would have been on a downwards ethical road which would make me loose my professionalism and self-pride in the long run. The bribe scenario is something that would have occurred to me eventually at this or another job because it is something that has become more common in today’s business environment. The internal conflict had a positive resolution since I was not tempted to accept the bribe. If I had accepted the potential negative consequences included being fire. The situation could have been an internal test from the company to evaluate me. The conflict help me realize that in the business world there are all types of people some of which are honest, while other are unethical cheaters that look for the easy route every time. The decision I made during this conflict help me grow as professional and as a person. Journal Notes: Four Conflicts (C1-C4) C1 - School team conflict Date: Fall 2008 Time: two hours each Length of argument: two team meetings Topic/Issue of conflict: lack of communication How often has this issue come up in the past? Rarely 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 very often What actually started/triggered the conflict? (this should be several sentences) The conflict occurred because everyone had different opinion on how to attack a problem and team member were not willing to listen to each other. Description of the conflict: verbal argument Emotions you experienced: I felt nervous and frustrated when the discussions occur How did it end? I intervened and confronted everyone about the problem Intensity of disagreement: Low 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 High Degree pf resolution: Resolved 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 Unresolved. C2 – Promotion injustice conflict Date: 2007 Time:_________(am/pm) Length of argument: a few months Topic/Issue of conflict – workplace injustice promotion given based on preferential treamtment How often has this issue come up in the past? Rarely 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 very often What actually started/triggered the conflict? There was a job opening and management said it would be fulfilled in-house. A rumor stir up that the job would be given to the cousin of a boss, the rumor was denied by the person in charge. It ended up being true. Description of the conflict: workplace injustice Emotions you experienced: Betrayal How did it end? The manager’s cousin got the job Intensity of disagreement: Low 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 High Degree pf resolution: Resolved 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 Unresolved. C3 – Parking spot conflict Date- 2009 Time:_________(am/pm) Length of argument: A few months Topic/Issue of conflict – discussion with neighbor over parking spots How often has this issue come up in the past? Rarely 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 very often What actually started/triggered the conflict? The person was constantly robbing my spot, when he acquired another car and started taking two spots away it triggered something within me to speak out my mind. Description of the conflict: verbal argument, Emotions you experienced: Trapped How did it end? It ended by discussing the issue like two civilized individuals Intensity of disagreement: Low 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 High Degree pf resolution: Resolved 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 Unresolved. C4 – Bribe at work Date: 2008 Time:_________(am/pm) Length of argument - took minutes Topic/Issue of conflict: A bribery offer at work, internal moral conflict How often has this issue come up in the past? Rarely 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 very often What actually started/triggered the conflict? During a normal working day a client comes up to me and makes me a monetary offer in exchange for preferential treatment Description of the conflict: verbal discussion Emotions you experienced: indifferent How did it end? The person walk away, while I continue my work shift Intensity of disagreement: Low 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 High Degree pf resolution: Resolved 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 Unresolved. Read More