The Concept of Falling in Love - Essay Example

? How people fall in love The concept of Love and Falling in love is very old. Throughout history, several reasons have beenproposed by the people to explain the mechanics of Love and its impact on people. In this paper, we try to analyse the mental and physical impact of falling in love on an individual and conclude by asserting that the physical impact of Love on an individual is massive but it varies from person to person due to personality traits and the time taken for its symptoms to last is also variable. Summary of findings Research reveals that the process of falling in love creates deep mental and physical impact on an individual. Rather than being a game of the heart, the process is a game of the mind as mind leads to the emotional and physical arousal. In all, 17 portions of the brain are stimulated by this extraordinary stimulate and they subsequently affect different parts of the body. Introduction Love, often known as an emotional process characterized by strong affection and attachment, is a natural process that brings two individuals together. Hence, love is a term that can be associated with all actions that are based on compassion or affection for the other being. In the Psychological context, love is depicted as a social and cognitive phenomenon. According to the triangular theory of Love, love is composed of three components namely, Commitment, Intimacy and Passion (Aron, 1995). Intimacy Intimacy is a process in which the individuals share confidences and unveil themselves to each other. They start developing a kind of medium through which both of them start thinking about their relationship and they try to retain the relationship on a courteous note. Commitment Commitment is the second stage of the relationship in which the two individuals start taking their relationship on a formal note thinking that the relationship is permanent and they have to play an important role in elongating it. Passion This component is characterised by fervour and glowing ardour where people strengthen the relationship with their strong feelings and prioritize the relationship in the strongest way. Hence, Love not only relates to the distinctive feeling but also to the actions occurring as a result of these feelings. That feelings becomes insignificant when compared to the passion it arouses into the individual. The old theories revealed that falling in love is a natural process like a religious conversion. These proposed the fact that people start falling in love when they are ready for a change to happen and they want to adopt that change. These theories also proposed that the emotional conflict plays a major role in love relationship building. Hence, falling in love is a totally emotional process that is beyond the control of a normal human being. Some religions also associated falling in love to spirituality. They believed that by falling in love a person does what God wants him to do; therefore, he becomes dearer to God (Goleman, 1996). New theories about falling in love Within the past decade, a lot of research has been done on the psychological and physical aspects of this phenomenon and many discoveries in this context have been made. According to a psychologist Mr. Aaron Ben-Zeev, falling in love involves two evaluative patterns namely attractiveness, the attraction to external experience, and praiseworthiness, the act of acclaiming positive characteristics. According to him, falling in love requires the existence of both these patterns. While a gorgeous woman might want people to fall in love with her for her beauty first and then for her personal characteristics, an unattractive woman would like people to love her for her kindness and wisdom first before her personal apparel attraction. Study also reveals that if love is based on monitory aspects and sexual attraction, it might not last long. For love to be successful, people should get attracted to the most basic instincts and characteristics of individuals. The presence of praiseworthiness and attraction are integral to love relationship. According to another research done by Syracuse University, falling in love can take only one fifth of a second. It is a quick process in which a person feels a feeling of euphoria for a brief moment and his/her emotional mechanism is activated. This emotional arousal causes him to stabilise his emotions and when he reaches the stage of emotional stabilization, he feels internal satisfaction as well as exuberance. This entire process takes place within a fifth of a second and according to one research, this is the minimum time taken for people to fall in love (Bryner, 2010). The physical aspect of falling in love Research on several instances has proved that it is not only one’s heart that works while one falls in love but also the brain has a lot of action to play in the entire process. When an individual falls in love, 12 areas of the brain work in tandem and secrete hormones such as dopamine, oxytocin, vasopressin and adrenaline. These neurons later affect the different parts of body to give an individual the feeling of falling in love. Activation of some parts of the brain can generate stimulation in the heart as well so the process of falling in love is not a singular process. Both heart and the brain are involved in the process of falling in love. The research also reveals that different parts of the brain are responsible in different situations. In case of a love between the mother and her child, the middle of the brain gets stimulated. In case of passionate love, the reward part of the brain is activated (Gordon, 2008). In addition, brain related activity showed that the people who were about to fall in love; their dopaminergic sub cortical system is activated which induces euphoria in such people. In addition, people under the influence of love activate areas of the brain that initiate emotional behaviours and sexual arousal. This explains the fact as to why physical relationships are followed by this emotional relationship. Investigations on neurology and brain scanning have revealed that falling in love is directly consistent with several specific behaviours and even mental illness. As one falls in love one’s heartbeat increases on account of the closeness to one’s loved one. The palms of hands become sweaty. A person in love starts thinking about his loved one obsessively and this affects the behaviour that he commits. He might also start having difficulties in completing his daily chores. Daydreaming is also a common symptom that is physical in nature. Almost all mental energies can be taken away by daydreaming for a person who has fallen in love. All these symptoms show that falling in love is a complex situation that is characterized by mental as well as physical and emotional markers. Another important thing to be noticed over here is that the behaviour and the emotional arousal is for a short period and these physical conditions begin to mitigate as an individual continues to spent time with his loved ones. After marriage, the emotional arousals are recurrent in the first few months and then the behaviour starts to mitigate. In addition, these symptoms are not consistent for each human being. People with different levels of emotional sensitivity seem to have varying levels of emotional and behavioural impact. People who are emotionally and physically stable demonstrate fewer symptoms of falling in love. People who are less emotionally and physically stable demonstrate high symptoms of falling in love. There is also room for criticism for the research carried out by the University of Syracuse. As the results mentioned are taken from only 17 participants. Since the focussed group is very small, the personality factors and their subsequent commonalities might create ambiguous and non-existential results. Application of findings The proposition that falling in love is more of a physical phenomenon can have far reaching implications. The finding can be used to build up healthy relationships as now people will be more aware about their internal arousals and emotional situation when they face such kind of situations. They can now control these feelings and carry their poise and balanced demeanour in such situations. They would also know how to satisfy their loved ones, as they would already know what he or she is going through. Also in their life after marriage, they would apply these emotional intelligence facts to understand their life partner in a much better way. Psychologists can also use this research and its findings to aid people in developing healthy relationships (Fischman, 2000). Future avenues for research The growing emphasis on the need to find the mechanisms in which the brain functions in relation to the concept of falling in love has opened new avenues for researchers. There are proposals for the research on neural links formed during the process of falling in love. There are also proposals to research on the behavioural psychology of falling in love and to research on why those behaviours occur. Conclusion The concept of falling in love has been in existence for decades. With the passage of time, several theories have been proposed to explain the psychological and physiological changes in the individuals who fall in love. In this paper, we explain the physiological impacts of Love on an individual and analyse the mental states that are characteristics of such behaviour. References Aron, A., Paris, M., & Aron, E. N. (January 01, 1995). Falling in Love: Prospective Studies of Self-Concept Change. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology,69, 6, 1102-1112. Bryner, J. (October 26, 2010). People Fall in Love, Brain and Soul. Retrieved from: http://www.livescience.com/8821-people-fall-love-brain-soul.html Fischman, J. (February 07, 2000). Why we fall in love. Us News and World Report, 128, 42. Goleman, D. (1996). Emotional intelligence. New York [etc.: Bantam. Gordon, R. M. (2008). An expert look at love, intimacy and personal growth: Selected papers in psychoanalytic social psychology. Allentown, Pa: IAPT Press. Read More