Correlation between Sex Parents and Their Children - Essay Example

? Correlation between Sex Parents and Their Children Insert Same sex parenting is increasing currently in most countries mostly in the US. Female people who engage in sexual activities are lesbians while gays engage in sexual activities with their fellow men. Mostly these people fall out in their marriages and make up their minds to enter into another relationship. Same sex people bring up children in the same way as heterosexual parents. This paper outlines aspects of same sex parenting. Most people feel that same sex parenting have negative effects on children. This is an idea that the paper explains extensively. There are independent subtopics that help to bring an outline of these ideas clearly. The paper provides a close view over the gay and lesbian parenting in comparison with heterosexual parenting. Sex Parents and their Children Introduction Lesbians and gays bringing up children have been increasing in the recent days. It is also more important to note that they will keep on doing so in future. These same sex parents experience certain problems in their daily endeavors. There is critical evidence that indicate that children of the same sex parents experience same life like any other children in heterosexual parenthood (Stacey & Biblarz, 2001). The researches carried out in recent years indicate that there is lack of relationship between the parents’ sexual orientation and all measures of child psychological, behavioral and emotional adjustment. The data proved, there is no jeopardy to children who grow up in families with one or two gay parents. This paper provides extensive discussion on gay and lesbian parents as compared to heterosexual parenting. Discussion Lesbians are female people who engage in sexual activities with other female counterparts. They may get children through scientific methods and participate in unison to take care of them. On the other hand, there are male people who engage in sexual activities with their male couples (Fox, 2000). They are called gay couples. They may also decide to adopt children or one of them may have got children prior to their relationship then, they decide to take care of the children jointly. Sexual intercourses between people of different gender is heterosexual. This is the widespread type of sex a cross the world. Many gay and lesbians are parents today. Census indicated female couples of same sex had 33% while male couples of gay covered 22% of all the population in the year 2000 (Joseph, 2009). It also outlined that one child under the age eighteen years lived in the custodian of parents of same sex. Regardless of the significance existence of 163,879 households that are in the leadership of either gay or lesbians in U.S ethnicity, three main concerns about gay and lesbian parents are usually voiced. They include fears that gay and lesbian women are psychologically ill, that heterosexual women are more maternal than lesbian women are and lastly gay men and lesbian women’s relationships with their partners give limited time for their children and their partners (Tasker, 2008). Generally, the research failed to provide the foundation for the concerns they are raising. In the first place, homosexuality is never a psychological problem although disclosure to discrimination and prejudice because of sexual orientation can cause serious distress. There is no research, which has proved sexual orientation to alter psychological functioning. Secondly, theories that gay and lesbian grownups do not fit to be parents have no basis. Heterosexual women and lesbian prove same characteristics in handling and rearing children. More so, they perform similar functions relating to children from gestation period to feeding and the general care for their children (Fox, 2000). Lesbians and gay couples divide their work involving children equally where they can deal with responsibilities just like any other person. Some studies give opinion that gay fathers and lesbian mothers have more superior skills than parents who are heterosexual. Therefore, there is no basis for disputing gays and lesbians as good fathers and mothers; this is true from the research that is carried out. They provide equal healthy and supportive environment for their children as their counterparts. Gay parenting Most of objections to gay marriage are based on religious beliefs that defy any form of proof or disproof. However, they provide one reasoning line can refute or confirm through giving evidence. The arguments are resting on two contentions, which are related. Heterosexual couples raise children while gays do not. Therefore, the gays do not need any benefit of marriage. They also do say that since gays do not raise children they do great harm to them. Through the evidence, all the arguments lie on false stereotypes. The ability to raise children is neither automatic in heterosexual couples nor acts as a limiting factor to gay couples. In the census of 2000 indicates that half of heterosexual people and a third of the gay couples raise children. It is true from this report that gays in California raise over seventy thousand children. The other point is that gay children suffer because of being in custody of male parents only. This point does not have any basis. According to the Academy of Pediatrics’ committee of Child and Family Health in 2002, the most recent review of gay parenting found out that there was no great differences between heterosexual children and the gay children. The committee assessed three wide areas of studies. The first area assessed the behavior judgment and attitudes of gay parents. The report gave fewer differences than similarities in heterosexual parents and gay parenting styles. The report shows that gay fathers have the same ability to provide for their children in the same manner as the nongay parents. Lesbians, Gay and their children psychological characteristics Many children who are in the custody of gay or lesbians were born in heterosexual relationship. The relationship may have broken or still existing. The former heterosexual partners may find their gay or lesbian partners after getting the child; therefore, they take care of the child (Joseph, 2009). Some of the same sex people opt to get children from donors who give them their reproductive cells. This is done through alternative insemination, surrogacy or adoption. Surrogates and donors may be unidentified or directly involved with the family and the child to a lesser or greater degree. Parenting behavior and personality, adjustment and personality of parents Heterosexual parents and gay or lesbian parents are different from each other. This brings in the basis of discrimination in both the categories of parenting. It is believed that lesbians and gay parents greatly affect their children’s well-being. Nevertheless, very few disparities revealed through studies of the last three decades when comparing heterosexual and lesbian mothers’ psychological adjustment, attitudes towards rearing of children and self-esteem. Lesbian mothers are in the category of standard functioning when cross-examined and score normal standards of anxiety, parenting stress and self-esteem, which are not distinguishable from heterosexual mothers. The lesbian mothers give first priority to their children, show commitment, and child-centered attitudes to maternal roles. They show greater concern in providing best male role models than heterosexual mothers who are divorced. Both heterosexual and lesbian mothers define themselves correspondingly maternal and marital interests, child-rearing customs and current lifestyles. They also report corresponding copping strategies, social backing networks and role conflicts. Empirical proof reveals that gay parents have considerable evidence for maturity and investment in paternal roles, which are not different from their corresponding heterosexual fathers. This is in the sense of encouraging autonomy or proving suitable recreation facilities to their children (Fox, 2000). . They usually stick to strict disciplinary guiding principles to place emphasis on control and development of cognitive skills and knowledge. They also involve their children in healthy activities. This is why there are lesser differences in parenting attitudes and styles of nongay and gay fathers. Children’s social and emotional development Children who are in the custody of lesbian or gay parents’ experience problems of divorce for their biological parents. Their psychological development takes place in this context. The important factors of separated parents or non-biological parent joining the family have kept out of the discussion in many reaches. The role of a missing parent ‘noncustodial’ in the child’s life miss in the during the research process. Children from divorced lesbian mothers suffer the same consequences as those children of divorced heterosexual children the researches have not provided any substantial differences in the growth of divorced lesbians and heterosexual mothers who are divorced. For instance, children from both groups show similar personality measures like self-esteem, relationships in peer groups, academic success, value of family relationship and behavioral difficulties. Mothers from any sexual orientation, have their children scoring higher in terms of self- esteem after they get into another new relationship (Patterson, 2000). Mostly those who find out their family’s background when they are still young have higher self-esteem compared to those who find out the same history when they are older. On the other hand, children of parents from the same category who remain without new partners, their children score lower in terms of self-esteem. It is from this point of view that children of same sex parents might have more high self-esteem than those from heterosexual families. This means that children from same sex parents get great concern from their parents than children from heterosexual families. It gives them and added advantage over their fellow counterparts in normal families (Joseph, 2009). There are concerns that social stigmatization can easily cause teasing from children from normal families to children, which will in turn cause great embarrassment to children of the same sex parents over their parents’ status. The studies show that this can cause restriction on ability to form and keep up friendship. Adult children of divorced lesbians recall more teasing during their early child life (Patterson, 2004). On the contrary, children from heterosexual divorced families receive less embarrassment and teasing (Meyer, 2003). Generally, children under the care of lesbians and gay parents create normal relationships with their peers and maintain their communal relationships, which is appropriate for their physical and mental development. Children of lesbian parents seem to grow developing ways, which are indistinguishable from children from heterosexual families. Parents and teachers rate them as children who demonstrate social competence and frequency of behavioral complexity to be comparable to population norms (Mays, & Cochran, 2001).. It reveals that growing up in a lesbian or gay family has more advantages than growing in heterosexual families. These kinds of children prove to be more tolerant to daily challenges as compared to children from heterosexual families. This indicates that gay or lesbian parents take proper care of their children than heterosexual parents. They give their children opportunities to explore and be independent thus gaining the ability to become even better than children from heterosexual parents. In most cases, children from heterosexual families observe themselves to be aggressive than lesbian and gay children. This made their teachers and parents to look at the as being bossy domineering and negative. On the other hand, the lesbian and gay children look at themselves as loveable (Levant, 2000).. This grades them as responsible and protective to young children as compared to the children of heterosexual parents. Another investigation indicates that both children of heterosexual and same sex parents have similar characteristics of sociability and aggressiveness. According to this research, it is possible that children from all the categories of parents experience similar effects in there live. Children’s sexual Orientation and Gender Identity Children of lesbian and gay parents show similar characteristics concerning gender identity with their counterparts from heterosexual parents. Among the five hundred same sex children, none of them confused his or her gender. Same sex children identify gender with their natural gender. None of the children indicated preference of the opposite gender. Young adults who were under the custody of lesbian parents mostly consider having same sex partner. In this case, most of the adults identified themselves to be homosexuals. This shows that the children were able to emulate their parents’ sexual behaviors. In another study revealed that there were no major differences in gender progress for either girls or boys in relation to their mother’s sexual orientation. National sample data of adolescents indicate that there existed no differences on the issue whether the parents were of the same sex or not (Falk, 2003). The proportion of those adolescents who had sexual intercourse and those who had a romantic relation within eighteen months was the same. Some few individuals reported having same sex relationships although the comparison was not possible. On long-term follow-up on children brought up by lesbians who divorced, indicate similar orientation in gender-role orientation (Fox, 2000). This is in the level of femininity or masculinity. Children who were brought up by single heterosexual mother after her divorce score higher in the level of femininity although they never show relative differences in the score of masculinity. Challenges in Lesbian and Gay children Gay, lesbian and heterosexual partners experience almost similar parental challenges. These challenges may include economic matters, behavioral issues of children in the family and housing facilities. On the other hand, the same sex parents may experience extra problems involving acceptance in the society (DeLeon, 2005). Most people would find it difficult to accept the fact that same sex parents are just normal people as others. They may also get problems when seeking for support from the members of the society who feel that they are on the wrong side of the humanity. Although this is improving slowly by slowly since this type of parenting is coming up in several areas of the globe and it might take another direction for appreciating the same sex parents. Fears and concerns As discussed above, most of same sex parents got their children when still in a heterosexual family. The worst fears facing recent parents is that they may lose possession of their children when their first companion demands for them. When courts rule in favor of the heterosexual partner, it makes it impossible for such same sex parent to get access to the child. Same sex parents who get their children through donor insemination may have additional issues to consider (Conger, 200). One of the issues is that the offspring may start wondering about their biological donor after developing to an adult. Children who grow up in same sex parental system ma y have different opinions on other children, which have their mother and father staying under the same roof. Children from same sex families may also tend to think on what other children might talk about them through insults. This may leave the children in deep thoughts thus affecting them psychologically. Same sex parent may worry that their children can be affected through staying in the same sex parenting system. Parents may also feel insecure in the family due to in acceptance of such forms of families in the society. Prejudice One of the greatest challenges facing same sex parents is prejudice. It may be on a personal or institutional level. It includes lack of legislation services or support groups in the society (Armesto, 2002).. In addition to that, there may be lack of proper recognition for non-biological parent. Same sex children may receive cold reception by their peers and teachers may pay less attention to them. How to meet the challenges Despite the fact that there are some difficulties in raising children in same sex family, there are ways that one can adopt to cope with the problems. First, one should evaluate the good side of his or her life. This will enable the parent to remain focused on taking care of the children as in the normal family. Same sex parents can set up a support group in the society to help those with similar problems. Parents should talk to their children’s teachers to ensure that the children are treated with care that they deserve and that other pupils do not bull them References Armesto, J. C. (2002). Developmental and contextual factors that influence gay fathers' parental competence: A review of the literature. Psychology of Men and Masculinity, Chicago: Harvard publishing Conger, J.J. (200). Proceedings of the American Psychological Association, Incorporated, for the year 1974: Minutes of the Annual meeting of the Council of Representatives. American Psychologist, New York: Macmillan Publishers DeLeon, P.H. (2005). Proceedings of the American Psychological Association, Incorporated, for the year 1992: Minutes of the annual meeting of the Council of Representatives August 13 and 16, 1992, and February 26-28, 1993,. American Psychologist Washington, DC. Falk, P.J. (2003). Lesbian mothers: Psychosocial assumptions in family law. American Psychologist, Washington, DC Fox, R.E. (2000). Proceedings of the American Psychological Association, Incorporated, for the year 1990: Minutes of the annual meeting of the Council of Representatives August 9 and 12, 1990, Boston, MA, and February 8-9, 1991, Washington, DC. American Psychologist, 45, 845. Joseph J. G. (2009). Testimony before the US House of Representatives Subcommittee on the Constitution. New York: Cambridge University Press. Levant, R.F. (2000). Proceedings of the American Psychological Association, Incorporated, for the legislative year 1999: Minutes of the Annual Meeting of the Council of Representatives February 19-21, 1999, Washington, DC, and August 19 and 22, 1999, Boston, MA, and Minutes of the February, June, August, and December 1999 Meetings of the Board of Directors. American Psychologist, 55, 832-890. Mays, V. M., & Cochran, S. D. (2001). Mental health correlates of perceived discrimination among lesbian, gay, and bisexual adults in the United States. American Journal of Public Health, New York: Macmillan Publishers Meyer, I. H. (2003). Prejudice, social stress, and mental health in lesbian, gay, and bisexual populations: Conceptual issues and research evidence. Psychological Bulletin, New York: Macmillan Publishers Patterson, C. J. (2004). Gay fathers. In M. E. Lamb (Ed.), The role of the father in child development (4th Ed.). New York: Press Patterson, C.J. (2000). Family relationships of lesbians and gay men. Journal of Marriage and Family, New York: Macmillan Publishers Patterson, C.J. (2004). Lesbian and gay parents and their children: Summary of research findings. In Lesbian and gay parenting: A resource for psychologists. American Psychological Association, Washington, DC:. Stacey, J. & Biblarz, T.J. (2001). (How) Does sexual orientation of parents matter? American Sociological Review, New York: Cambridge University Press. Tasker, F. (2008). Children in lesbian-led families - A review. Clinical Child Psychology and Psychiatry, New York: Cambridge University Press. Read More