How to Make Life Meaningful - Essay Example

Lecturer: How to make life meaningful Introduction A meaningful life is a phrase that encompasses various definitions that are associated with the actions that entail seeking satisfaction in life. Meaning can be considered as the connection that links two seemingly autonomous entities together. Even though specific theories vary, two common aspects exist: a universal manner of understanding an individual’s life and the conviction that life in itself is a meaningful aspect. The people who possess a sense of meaning generally have lower levels of negative emotions and are less susceptible to suffer mental illness. Since the stated goals of positive psychology are to create thriving people and lead to a more fulfilling life, the interests of positive psychology are no longer treating people with disorders or illness but making the life of a normal person more fulfilling and flourishing. Hence, the mission statement of positive psychology accompanies the act of pursuing a meaningful life. The mission statement states: A Meaningful life is connected to positive functioning: work enjoyment, satisfaction in life, hope, general positive effect as well as happiness and a higher degree of well-being. Research has demonstrated that people have a propensity to create stories as a means of understanding occurrences in life with a life story being a means of imposing meaning on life and therefore connecting people to occurrences (Loewenstein 46). In regards to the manner in which meaning in demonstrated, understanding loss appears as more important during the adjustment process subsequent to the loss while recognizing the benefits may be a more long-term process that takes place over time with the biggest benefits becoming evident later on. Making life more meaningful There is a consensus that individuals should remain true to what matters and themselves in order to get a meaningful life (Baumeister and Bushman 435). Various strategies exist that can be used by individuals to uncover their true selves and identify and challenge their obstacles that hinder them from seeking their dreams. Three significant steps towards making life meaningful include: Focusing on what one really wants For most of the people, simply understanding who they are is a challenging endeavor and based in research that has been conducted previously, approximately forty percent of all the people in America have not yet identified a sense of purpose as far as their lives are concerned. It can be easy to tell people to live life on their own terms, but if they have not been able to identify their own terms, they may develop the feeling that they are drifting through their own experiences. When a person does not know what he or she wants, that person navigates through life in the same manner as a ship that does not have a rudder. Understanding one’s principles is important in making sure that the individual stays on course regardless of the challenges life throws at them. When seeking to live a meaningful life, one should begin by identifying the aspects that he or she enjoys or finds enlightening and what matters. The family, society and community is a good source of information concerning what an individual should be engaged in, but the question of what a person enjoys or considers meaningful is best answered by an individual. Every person controls what he or she wants in life and thinking about ones wishes and wants is not a selfish act as it is an important part of self-awareness (Smedslund 67). Identifying ones principles does not mean that all other things are supposed to be cast aside since making the decision on what matters entails acknowledging the people who matter to the individual, recognizing that they are a priority in an individual’s life and that taking care of them is an aspect of making oneself happy. When a person lives a life that he or she cherishes, all aspects of this life will hold meaning and there is higher likelihood of the individual showing more kindness, being more considerate and appreciative of other people and the paths they take in life. When a person is fulfilled in himself or herself, that person will be more dedicated to him or herself. A study that was conducted in 2002 revealed that happy people had higher probabilities of having fulfilling relationships and marriages, more income, better performances at work, more involvement in the community as well as superior health and prolonged life. Additionally, the study suggested that positive emotions are habitually associated with aspects such as creativity, amiability, liveliness, positivity and altruism. A person possesses more value in the world when he is able to find and invest in the gifts that he can offer exceptionally. Therefore, is a person is comfortable around a particular group of people or prefers specific friends, these people should be made a priority and if the same person prefers a specific activity, he should award it sufficient time so that he can enjoy it more. Individuals should not assume that they know everything about themselves or confine themselves to specific characteristics as this may result in the missing out on some aspects. This is because some things may seem difficult or impossible when a person has not tried them, but once he or she tries to engage in the activity, it can end up being a key part of life that is also extremely fulfilling. Through taking steps of this kind, people can be able to get meaning into their lives as they provide support and strength for the real self. Setting precise goals In most cases, people dwell on their goals negatively and rather than focusing on things that are positive in the pursuit of their goals, they focus on the negatives that will make them consider the goals as punishments. It is more preferable for a person to write down his core values and the conduct that he is likely to display is in accordance with his beliefs. To ensure that the individual focus on the created list, he should try to make the list shorter while thinking about the precise actions that can be take in order to get nearer to the identified goals and setting smaller waypoints that will be accomplished in the process. In this manner, keeping oneself accountable while at the same time monitoring progress will become easier. A study conducted recently demonstrated that the individuals, who wrote down their objectives, came up actions to achieve the set objectives and shared regular progress reports with a friend were able to achieve considerably more than the ones who simply set goals. The study arrived at the conclusion that the three coaching instruments; commitment, accountability and writing down goals, were exceptionally effective in assisting people to become successful. If a person sets out to achieve too many objectives or sets standards that are difficult to achieve, they is more likelihood they will be overwhelmed and may therefore end up feeling anxious and scattered rather than being organized and on-track. Ignoring the inner critic When a person starts taking actions in the direction of set objectives, he should be cautious for roadblocks that will unavoidably come up. The first enemy that people meet is the critical inner voice, which resembles a coach in the head that tries to ensure that a person is feeling safe through upholding defensive adaptations to life while making sure a familiar identity is reinforced. This puts discourages a person and undermines a person’s desires with thoughts that are disheartening, dispiriting and frightening. This inner critic usually warns the person about making changes and embarking on newer approaches to life by telling the person that if he or she goes for what the heart desires, it is a recipe for utterly humiliating failure (Sherfield 59). This critical inner voice can be considered as the language of an anti-self, which is the aspect of a person that acts as a barrier to his or her self-interest. It is comprised of a destructive perspective that was integrated in to the life of a person at an early stage in life. The anti-self is usually self-critical and pessimistic towards other people, and at the same time paranoid, deeply suspicious of others and self-hating as well as destructive to other people (Firestone, Firestone and Catlett 4). On the other hand, the real self of an individual is comprised of his or her own exceptional desires, wants, as it is goal-oriented, and life affirming. The brain of a human being is wired in such a manner that it focuses on the aspects that appear dangerous or occurrences that are considered as life threating (Ferreira 86). Regrettably, as a consequence of this, negative occurrences that occurred in childhood have the capacity to leave stronger impressions on people compared to the positive ones. For instance, when a parent unexpectedly becomes angry with a child, it can be a scary situation to the small child since the total reliance of the child on the parents along with other caretakers makes their effect on their emotions more considerable. When still young, people adopt the disruptive attitudes that are acted out or directed at them by their caretakers in stressful moments (Daalmans 114). The attitudes of the parents towards them that they adopted as well as their own attitudes assist in the creation of the inner critic. During the course of life, people’s moods are affected by the critical inner voice they possess and when the individual tries to distinguish himself from these thoughts and live their own lives founded on the objectives and desires of the real self, the critic voices usually become louder. Usually, anxiety develops when a person embarks of his attempts to achieve his set objectives and the inner critic voice gets in the way while attempting to undermine efforts through self-doubts or luring the person to postpone. In the end, it becomes easy to get lost in one’s own mind, thinking over objectives but never taking action to achieve them. In order to change one’s life, it is imperative to embrace a zero tolerance approach to the inner critic and quickly interrupting thoughts of discouragement. Conclusion Even though advantages to making life meaningful exist, there is still no specific way of achieving this meaningfulness. The people who have been achieved success in the creation of meaningful lives enjoy benefits like more positive affect and satisfaction in life among other things. Finding meaning in life has been demonstrated to assist greatly in making adjustments when an individual is experiencing a stressful event in life. Creating meaning in life is inherently connected to the goals of positive psychology that seek to increase the good life for the people who are non-disordered. It is through a meaningful life that individuals get the ability to identify connections to other people, things and places while leaving a mark in the society as this makes the good life develop meaning. Works cited Baumeister, Roy F, and Brad J Bushman. Social Psychology And Human Nature. Belmont, CA: Cengage Learning, 2011. Print. Daalmans, Juni. Human Behavior In Hazardous Situations. Amsterdam: Elsevier Science, 2012. Print. Ferreira, Keith N. Uncertaintyism. New York: iUniverse, 2005. Print. Firestone, Robert, Lisa A Firestone, and Joyce Catlett. The Self Under Siege. New York: Routledge, 2013. Print. Loewenstein, George. Exotic Preferences. Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2007. Print. Sherfield, Robert M. The Everything Self-Esteem Book. Avon, Mass.: Adams Media Corp., 2004. Print. Smedslund, Jan. The Structure Of Psychological Common Sense. Mahwah, N.J.: L. Erlbaum Associates, 1997. Print. Read More