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Normative Sexuality in Children - Essay Example

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Normative sexuality refers to the normal sexual orientation whereby sexual and marital associations are mostly (or only) recognized when it occurs between a man and a woman…
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Normative Sexuality in Children
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?Normative sexuality in children of the How the body of the child might question notions of normative sexuality? Normative sexuality refers to the normal sexual orientation whereby sexual and marital associations are mostly (or only) recognized when it occurs between a man and a woman. Normative sexual behavior has been depicted in children as young as 2 years of age. The results of such behaviors have remained challenging to clinicians as differentiating them with those caused by sexual abuse.1 The close relationships between sexual abuse and normative sexual behavior in children have drawn a lot of concern in the recent past. This has called for knowledge expansion among the practicing pediatricians as regards to what is to be considered normative about sexual actions in children and teenagers and those that might be an indication that the child has been a victim of sexual abused or even acting in a manner that demonstrates sexual aggressiveness to fellow children. However it is worth noting that sexual development and plays are a positive indication of healthy and natural processes in children from toddlers through childhood to adolescence. For the case of toddlers and infant, it may involve body sensations, cuddling and touch amongst others. Behavior such as rubbing of genital parts and even erection experience is witnessed among the infant boys.2 It is also common that early school going children start inquiring about the function of various body parts. This later on graduates to sexual intercourse that is associated with affection and love for the opposite sex. During pre-adolescent stage of child development, they start getting involved in social relationships and expectation of indulging in clearer sexual feelings. Children touch and rub their sexual organs and this goes to the extent of masturbation. This would go into and even beyond puberty. At puberty and adolescence, the body parts and sex organs develop and this stage sets the onset of menstrual cycles among girls and routine masturbation especially for boys. There is the evidence of a lot of intimacy and romance which ultimately leads to dating, kissing and eventually sexual relationships and intercourse.3 It is very important to determine the age at which a child is appropriate or inappropriate sexual actions and respectively. For most children, sexual behaviors are exhibited throughout their childhood even before attaining puberty. However it will be considered normative (or expected) when the behaviors are not hostile, overtly sexual and are more exploratory in nature. Behaviors such as genital penetration and private part-mouth contact are not common and therefore considered non-normative.4 Sexual growth just as any areas of growth develops over time. There are certain behaviors that should not be ignored when a child develops. This is because such behaviors can be dangerous to the child and those who associate or interact with them. This therefore calls for keenness in deciding whether the behavior is natural or healthy. In addition the red flag needs to be raised especially when the behavior is considered extensive or involving others in non-consensual ways. For sexually reactive group of children, there is normally a tendency of engaging in several age-inappropriate sexual actions. This is majorly contributed by the fact that they were at one point exposed to sexual experiences. This drives them into engaging in sexual behaviors or relations characterized by too much sexual play, sexual abuse and molestation of other children.5 Exposing children of the age bracket of ten and below the years will lead them into emulating what they observe and hear. Such exposure may include but not limited to all natures of sexual actions with adolescents and adults viewing of sexually explicit and pornographic materials. Witnessing activities considered sexual between adults, adolescent or even other children. Such exposure might drive sexually reactive children into luring and engaging other children younger or of the same age into mutual sexual play. Others will get involved into excessive masturbation or attempt sexual contact with toys or even animals. Extreme sexual activities such as oral sex, intercourse and digital penetration can be evident as a sign of trying out on significant encounters with other children of same age or younger ages. Molestation will be evident when there is no mutual response from younger children as expected. These sexual behaviors are normally considered inappropriate.6 It is therefore important for one to know some of the signs to look out for sexual disturbance. Some of them include but not restricted to; children being pre-occupied with plays that are sexual in nature but instead should engage in other form of plays. The sexual plays should not be with the drive of indulging in sexual activities. The children have to be able to adhere to instructions by stopping whenever cautioned by an adult. Children, who show shame, fear or guilt in their sexual play is a call for concern. The sexual activities that the children engage should not be adult- type. Sexual activities should not involve animal in any way.7 How thinking about children and bodies involve the simultaneous absence and presence of sex It is evident that today children are expressing more complex sexual behaviors as compared to children in the past. Children also indulge in sexual activities at a very tender age now compared to some years back. This has been contributed by the fact that children of this error and time are exposed to an onslaught of messages of sexual content. This happens frequently and from different sources. The messages are normally explicit, contain submissive images and are sensational in nature. This has led to increase in curiosity about sex especially for those children whose parents do not intervene in good time. Continued exposure will mean that some children get so much indulged into sexual matters.8 Thinking about children and their bodies will dictate whether there will be simultaneous presence or absence of sex among them. This therefore calls for a deeper understanding of children’s bodies and getting right peoples way of thinking towards them. A point to remember in order to properly manage this issue is for instance by being an “ask able” parent. As a parent, always be ready to give answers whenever a child asks in order to get to know about sex related issues. This is because, when as a parent you fail to provide the child with and answer, they will get them from elsewhere. Ensure that you promise to provide them with an answer at a later date after consulting but not avoiding the issue or dismissing it.9 Becoming familiar with the developmental needs and tasks of children that relates to their sexuality is crucial. Learning more about sex and sexuality and discussing issue relating to the topic will make you comfortable and therefore tackle effectively questions that might arise from children. This will ensure that children get right if not best answers as to their sexuality related questions.10 Parents need to be in the fore front in bringing up the sex topic. This needs to happen before they start to get questions pertaining sex. By children not being open enough to ask questions that regards sex does not mean that they should not know. Such assumption may lead to children looking for answers elsewhere which might be even the worst sources to obtain information. Research has shown that as much as parents might think that they speak so often about sex with their children, it is not enough.11 Thinking that a child does not know about sexual matter simply because you don’t show or say some things related to sex are wrong. This is because children get to interact with other children who might have heard or even seen such scenarios and therefore would share with those whom have neither seen nor heard about the same. Therefore accepting that children might have had previous experience elsewhere and hence discussing about their sexuality might be fruitful. Most people tend to think that children are less of sexual human beings. This is not right as this makes parents treat their children as always young and therefore they do not need to be informed accordingly on sexuality matters irrespective of their gender. This becomes disastrous as the children will eventually start experiencing challenging bodily changes that might lead them to awkward behaviors if not carefully given attention by their parents or older people. 12 The variation in children’s developmental process will result into some experiencing adolescent or puberty at an earlier stage of childhood. This will mean experiencing bodily changes sooner than expected. Challenges such as engaging oneself in masturbation will be sooner than expected from the old forks. The way forward for this will be to let the child know that actually masturbation is not harmful only that it ought to be done private in nature. Getting the child to know what is to be done in public and those that are meant for privacy becomes beneficial to the child and society as a whole.13 Bibliography Arie?s and Philippe. Centuries of childhood: a social history of family life. New York: Alfred A. Knopf, 1962. Bornstein, Kate, and S. Bear Bergman. Gender outlaws: the next generation. Berkeley, Calif.: Seal Press :, 2010. Bruhm, Steven, and Natasha Hurley. Curiouser: on the queerness of children. Minneapolis: University of Minnesota Press, 2004. Connell and Raewyn. Gender: in world perspective. 2nd ed. Cambridge: Polity, 2009. Cossins and Anne. Masculinities, sexualities, and child sexual abuse. The Hague: Kluwer Law International, 2000. Egendorf and Laura K.. Should parents be allowed to choose the gender of their children?. Detroit: Greenhaven Press, 2008. Kuehnle, Kathryn, and Mary Connell. The evaluation of child sexual abuse allegations: a comprehensive guide to assessment and testimony. Hoboken, N.J.: Wiley, 2009. Rose and Jacqueline. The case of Peter Pan or the impossibility of children's fiction. Revised ed. London: MacMillan, 1994. Rousseau and George. Children and sexuality: the Greeks to the Great War. New York: Palgrave Macmillan, 2007. Stockton and Kathryn Bond. The queer child, or growing sideways in the twentieth century. Durham: Duke University Press, 2009. Wiener, Jerry , and Mina. Dulcan. Textbook of child and adolescent psychiatry. 3rd ed. Washington, D.C.: American Psychiatric Pub., 2004. Zimmerman and Toni. Integrating gender and culture in parenting. Binghamton, N.Y.: Haworth ;, 2003. Read More
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