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Knowing My Past and Present - Essay Example

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Summary
In the paper “Knowing My Past and Present” the author describes his experience of self-confidence, which is a significant character trait that he finds lacking him. He especially feels the lack of it on occasions when he is to speak to an audience or a group of people…
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Knowing My Past and Present
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Knowing My Past and Present General Self Confidence: Self confidence is a significant characteristic trait that I find lacking in me. I especially feel the lack of it on occasions when I am to speak before an audience or a group of people. I feel nervous when I stand in front of a crowd, especially when it occurs on some special events. Due to this limitation in me, I have always avoided being in leadership positions in class or in other social circles. Therefore, when I have to speak before the class for some project or presentation etc, I need to be pushed by my classmates or friends. However, when I am in smaller groups of my close friends or relatives, I do not have any problem relating to self confidence. I find it easy to talk and interact with them. Close friends also provide me a sense that they know me well and understand my feelings and emotions. In addition, I find joy in sharing my feelings and emotions with them as well as knowing about their feeling and emotions. Thus, I feel secure and comfortable when I am among my close friends or relatives mainly because of the knowledge that they will not mock or criticize me even if I make any mistakes in my talk. Responses of Friends: The responses of both friends confirm my view of myself. They said that I am a shy and somewhat introvert type of person. In most cases, these friends are the ones that push me to the front when I hesitate to do something like speaking before my class or address a gathering for a speech. Both of them have also substantiated my view that I am comfortable interacting with the close friends I have. They have added that I appear to be quite confident and easy going when I am among the circle of close friends or peers. Regulating Moods to Minimize the Impact on Other People: I always make it a point not to hurt the feelings of other people and, therefore, I regulate my moods and emotions so as to make others feel happy and comfortable in my company and to avoid any negative impact on them. I feel responsible for my actions and this sense of onus has always made me take the responsibility for my mistakes. Therefore, I take extra precaution to ensure that my words or actions, in no way, come into the conflict with the feelings of others and their emotions. For example, if I am in a company of a religious minority, and someone makes a joke about them, I do not laugh at the joke. Instead, I also make an attempt to dissuade such people from making such jokes. This way, I attempt to avoid such situations without hurting the feeling of both parties. Similarly, when I am at work, I take maximum care not to criticize my colleagues unnecessarily. On the other hand, when my subordinates fail to respond appropriately to the tasks assigned to them, I do deal with them firmly. Responses of Friends: One friend has stated that I adjust myself to avoid confrontations with others and that I always behave in a responsible manner to make sure that what I say or do does not hurt others. On the other hand, the second friend has responded that though I am able to adjust with others in the case of strangers, I am not so responsible when it concerns friends. His point of view is that in a formal context, when I interact with people who are not close to me, I behave responsibly to make sure that my words or actions do not hurt others. However, he has further stated that when I am among close friends, I behave in a rather carefree manner and do not pay much attention to my words or actions and I do not consider whether these may cause problems to them. I agree to this to a certain extent because when in the company of friends, I open up without thinking much about what the repercussions of my words would be. Understanding the Emotions and Needs of Others: I am a very compassionate person and I consider it as my responsibility to make attempts to understand why people behave in certain peculiar ways. By thinking from the perspectives of others and their experiences, I am able to see their propriety of their actions from their points of view. Thus, I am able to understand the emotions behind their certain actions as well as their needs. Therefore, if a friend talks irrationally to me as the outburst of an emotion, I do not feel hatred towards him or her. Instead, I realize that the person will understand his fault once the emotion subsided and then speak to him. In addition, I have undergone a lot of sociology courses, which has enabled me to know the motivations behind people’s action. This has enabled me to always respond to others with a high sense of understanding and justice. Thus, my close friends are always comfortable in my company and when they have any conflict amongst themselves they come to me for advice and settlement of disputes. Similarly, this also has enabled me to attain a sense of responsibility and dutifulness towards the society. Responses of Friends: Both the responses of my friends corroborate my view that I am quite understanding and accommodative of my friends. They both stated the when my friends make an emotional outburst I respond to the in a cool manner and later made them understand their mistake. They also added that they are quite comfortable when they are in my company and they have the confidence that I would always consider their points of view. They also agreed to the fact that I always understand their emotions and needs and also that I have the habit of adjusting to the needs of others when I interact with them. Networking with Other People: My ability to understand people and their motivations and the trait of responding to them appropriately, has imbibed in me the ability to build a large networks of friends. However, I feel attracted to only those individuals who are like me in their tastes and preferences. But once I choose a person to be a friend and involves with him or her, I am always able to persuade them to pursue common interests and goals. However, I feel comfortable in making friends with others only when they are alone or in groups of two or three. Recently, I have met a person in a mall who has been shopping alone for some sports gear and attires. He has been selecting brands that I liked and thus I strike a conversation with him about NBA games. He is now a steady friend of mine and we often network on Facebook and Twitter, apart from sharing other interests. We have also introduced our mutual friends to one another and thus created a wide circle of friends and currently we share many common interests such as NBA, discussion of movies as well as other activities. Responses of Friends: The first response indicated that I am quite comfortable with making friends and I do mingle with people easily and attract them. It also stated that I am quite good in making new friends, apart from retaining the existing network of friends. On the other hand, the second friend stated that I make friends easily with only people who are more or less in the same wavelength as that of my character. He further added that I am not comfortable with friends who do not gel well with my traits and also I am good in making friends with individuals rather than a group. Comfort Zones: I am always quite comfortable with my close friends and peers and I interact with them frequently and regularly. I also feel quite comfortable within the college campus, especially with my peers. I get along very well with them and I also have a lot of friends from classes other than mine. I participate in a lot of fun activities with them like playing games, doing exercises as well as reading and social networking. I move well with these friends and receive a lot of positive energy when I am among the peers within the campus. I also interact frequently and well with my teachers, who guide me in my studies and assignments. Over all, I feel motivated, encouraged and inspired with the people around me in the campus and I really enjoy the life in here. Responses of Friends: One of the friends stated that I am comfortable with my close friends and I always find them to be my comfort zone. He went on to suggest that I got well along with my close friends within the college campus. The other friend stated that the college campus is my comfort zone and I mingled well with my peers. However, both opinions differed in the context that the first stated about close friends but the latter stated in a more general sense, including peers also, while both agreed that the campus was my comfort zone. Read More
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