Should Parents Bribe Children for Good Behavior - Research Paper Example

Table of Contents Table of Contents This research paper is based on the role bribes may play in determining the behaviour of a child. The findings will illustrate how offering bribes to a child in order to influence positive behaviour may backfire in the end. It will confirm that offering bribes to a child is only effective in the short run but may not achieve the desired result when valuated in the future. It will lend credence to research, which has found that bribes are not effective in influencing good behaviour in children, and that other modes such as praise and encouraging positive character may be more effective. Introduction Many parents are faced with a dilemma whether it is a good habit to bribe children for good behaviour. There is a thin line between a bribe and a reward when offered to the child as in both instances, the child receives something for doing what the parent wants him to do or how the parent expects him to behave like. The question that then should be asked is when should this be assumed to be helpful to the child in imparting good behaviour or when should it be assumed to be harmful. Parents do describe their interaction with their children as that laden with promises and treats that are enticing to their children in exchange for good behaviour that makes them feel as if they are involved in acts of bribery with their children for compliance to norms deemed to be good behaviour. This leads to children having expectations on being given something extra or a reward for simply undertaking their daily responsibilities and obligations, which in turn leads to a false sense of entitlement. Parents should therefore understand that bribing their children for good behaviour might become an on-going pattern that ultimately makes your child to act in an unbecoming manner just to get what he wants. Literature Review The article by Amanda Ripley (2010) Should Kids Be Bribed to Do Well in School published in Time Magazine (1) says that children should get used to appropriate and well-deserved rewards as opposed to bribes for good behaviour in that children who are bribed can perform poorly in class as it cheapens the act of learning. It is important to note that a common question that confronts children is why there is need to acknowledge children when that is expected of them. Arnall (2007, p.115) argues that bribes and praise are just similar to punishments and can both be used to manipulate the behaviour of a child. She argues that bribes are an ineffective way in teaching children proper behaviour in the end. Graziano (2009, p.79) states that praise and affection are some of the two strongest secondary enforcers that may influence the behaviour of a child. He however argues that this is only possible when applied for a few weeks then withdrawn gradually. Bribing the child to induce good behaviour is therefore discouraged, as a child will comply in most instances with instruction only when a bribe is offered (Fisher, Cathleen and Henry 2011, p.50). Methodology This research was conducted using the questionnaire method in which respondents answered questions on the relationship between bribery and good behaviour in a child. A questionnaire was passed around in which respondents were asked whether they had a child and the effect of bribery to the child in relation to good behaviour. Responses were also got on whether a child had received bribes from the parents in return for a favourable behaviour. Children were also asked whether they had been bribed by their parents in order to be at the best of their behaviour and what the bribe was. At the end, parents were asked whether the bribe led to good behaviour by the child and whether they thought that the child learnt the concept of bribing due to the bribes offered to them at an early age and whether they believed in the concept of bribing children to induce good behaviour. Parents were also asked whether they would stop the bribes if they found out that the method was inappropriate and would make their children develop some unwanted habits in their development. The questionnaire was created through www.surveymonkey.com Findings and Discussion On analysis, 61.18% of the respondents interviewed who had children, 51.76% believed it was appropriate to bribe children to have good behaviour. Majority of children confessed to having been bribed by their parents in return to good behaviour with the figure standing at 78.79% for those who had been bribed as opposed to 21.21% who confessed having not to have been bribed by their parents for good behaviour. The most common bribes included chocolates, food, weekend outings and pocket money in the figures of 77.46%, 66.20%, 23.94% and 9.86% respectively. Most parents believed that the concept of bribery is learnt from early age and bribery leads to good behaviour from the child. 43.53% of parents believed that bribing children is the most appropriate way of teaching them good conduct while 20% believed that sometimes bribery led to good behaviour in children especially when done in moderation. 20% did not believe in bribing children for good behaviour. When asked whether they would stop bribing their children if they knew that it had a negative on their behaviour, 83.53% admitted they would stop the bribes while a paltry 3.53% said they would not stop the bribes. A further 12.94 stated that they would reduce the bribes offered to the children. Furthermore, from the findings, it is important to note that in most instances, parents are forced to bribe their kids under duress in that the child shows bad behaviour and expects to be bribed in order to be in the best of their behaviour. A confusion thereafter arises when the child develops this as a habit that when not put in control makes the child be at the driver’s seat that at times is used as a mode of extortion or blackmail whenever a child wants anything. The findings indicate that given that a bribe often dictates behaviour and its consequences, offers of bribes to a child encourages them to ask continuously for the same. Therefore, a child who is frequently offered bribes will form a habit of discrimination against when a bribe is due and would have an effect or when it is not. Conclusion and Recommendation Bribery should not be encouraged at all, as a way of inducing good behaviour in a child rather there should be strategic recognition and affection to children with rewards that are tangible. This would include praising the child or giving encouragement whenever a child acts in the best or desired behaviour. Parents are also asked to select and determine concrete rewards that seem important to the child in order that they seem to add value to the life of the child and make a list of incentives that the child is able to learn from on a daily basis through direct participation of the child. Parents can also determine these rewards ahead of time and being clear of the expected behaviour while at the same time teaching the child the desired behavioural components. Parents can also guide their children the appropriate ways of checking their achievements through the solution of problems, role-playing and tests on the application of new skills acquired by the child. It is also important that the parents become kind to their children and themselves as having a look at what behaviour that needs to be reinforced and how it is done may lead to a change in approach and give better results. Therefore, it is imperative to note that when parents adopt bribery as a way of controlling the behaviour of the child, the costs or prices to be paid when you stop the bribes is higher than it may seem at the present moment. Therefore, parents should implore their children to earn or seem to be entitled to reasonable rewards through the taking care of the responsibilities that are due to the child and making positive steps towards improving the behaviour of the child. In summary, parents should not bribe their children to induce good behaviour as the bribes fail to teach children the desired respect and a sense of responsibility in that the kids will develop a sense of entitlement, which will lead to a life of unhappiness for both the parent and the child when the bribe is not offered. Offering bribes to influence good behaviour, therefore, becomes counterproductive in the end. The child who is offered bribes eventually learns that good behaviour must not have an intrinsic value but rather that it is an entitlement and he must be paid to be at his best behaviour. Appendix Should parents bribe children for good behaviour? If so, what are the appropriate bribes? 1. Do you have a child? 2. Do you believe it is appropriate to bribe children for good behaviour? 3. Have you ever bribed your children? 4. Have you been bribed by your parents in return for appropriate behaviour? 5. What have you been bribed or bribed with? 6. Did the bribe lead to appropriate behaviour from the child? 7. Do you think the child learns the concept of bribing due to bribing them in their early age? 8. Do you believe bribing children has been the appropriate method for teaching them good conduct? 9. Would you stop bribes if you knew that this method produces some kind of a negative effect on the child leaning and development? 2. Do you have a child?   Response Response Percent Count Yes   61.18% 52 No   38.82% 33   Answered question 85   Skipped question 0 1.     Do you believe it is appropriate to bribe children for good behaviour?   Response Response Percent Count Yes   51.76% 44 No   36.47% 31 It depends   11.76% 10   Answered question 85   Skipped question 0 3.     Have you ever bribed your children?   Response Response Percent Count Yes   82.69% 43 No   17.31% 9   Answered question 52   Skipped question 33 4.     Have you been bribed by your parents in return for appropriate behaviour?   Response Response Percent Count Yes   78.79% 26 No   21.21% 7   Answered question 33   Skipped question 52 5.     What have you been bribed or bribed with?   Response Response Percent Count Chocolate   77.46% 55 weekend outing   23.94% 17 Food   66.20% 47 Pocket Money   9.86% 7 Others   18.31% 13   Answered question 71   Skipped question 14 6.     Did the bribe lead to appropriate behaviour from the child?   Response Response Percent Count Yes   50.70% 36 Sometimes   36.62% 26 Never   12.68% 9   Answered question 71   Skipped question 14 7.     Do you think the child learns the concept of bribing due to bribing them in their early age?   Response Response Percent Count Yes   35.29% 30 It depends   24.71% 21 No   40.00% 34   Answered question 85   Skipped question 0   8.     Do you believe bribing children has been the appropriate method for teaching them good conduct?   Response Response Percent Count Yes   43.53% 37 Sometimes(In moderation)   20.00% 17 No   29.41% 25 Others   7.06% 6   Answered question 85   Skipped question 0 9.     Would you stop bribes if you knew that this method produces some kind of a negative effect on the child leaning and development?   Response Response Percent Count Yes   83.53% 71 No   3.53% 3 Reduce   12.94% 11   Answered question 85   Skipped question 0 References Amanda, R. 2010. Should Kids Be Bribed to Do Well in School? Time Magazine. [Online]. Available at: http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1978758,00.html [Accessed May 19 2013]. Arnall, J. 2007. Discipline Without Distress: 135 Tools for Raising Caring, Responsible Children Without Time-Out, Spanking, Punishment, or Bribery. Calgary: Professional Parenting Canada. Fisher, W.W, Cathleen C.P and Henry, S.R. 2011. Handbook of Applied Behavior Analysis. New York: Guilford Press. Graziano, A.M. 2009. Behavior Therapy with Children: Volume 2. New Brunswick, N.J: Aldine Transaction. Read More