Divorce's Impact on Preschool, School-Age, and Adolescent Children - Essay Example

Divorce’s Impact on Preschool, School-age, and Adolescent Children Introduction The divorce process usually begins in emotional divorce or marital disharmony and ends after several crises in the final termination of the marriage agreement. A number of studies have indicated that many children normally suffer a long period of grief during the divorce process, which may turn worse after the dissolution of the marriage. Many children suffer long-term psychological distress, new stresses and have social difficulties that are associated with their parents’ separation.

Statistics also indicate that children usually show significant differences in how they respond to their parents’ separation across different age groups. Therefore, this paper primarily focuses on discussing the impacts of divorce on children across different age groups. It also identifies and describes the steps that taken to minimize the rate of divorce across different families, and how the affected children can be helped to cope up with their parents’ separation. Preschool ChildrenResearchers have established that the relative risk of developing severe emotional disorders usually increases after divorce (Clarke-Stewart & Brentano, 2008).

These studies further identify that divorce affects preschool children more than other children age groups. Additionally, preschool children have a significant influence on their parents’ decision to divorce. Children usually believe that people who love one another should always be together and take care of one another. They cannot comprehend the meaning of divorce, and when their parents separate, they may argue that they are not worth loving one another (Clarke-Stewart & Brentano, 2008).

This perception can have a serious effect on their development of self-esteem. Some cannot even come into terms with their parents’ separation and indicate fantasies of reconciliation. The side effects of divorce on preschool children are exhibited through their every day’s attitudes and behaviors, some of which are unpleasing. School-age ChildrenChildren in this age bracket are beginning to develop strong personalities, and they have discovered a lot in their environment. At this age, they also have a strong understanding of ideas about love, attachment and safety (Grych & Fincham, 2001).

They also discovered to change their unwelcome behaviors with the ones their parents admire. School-age children know the significance of their family remaining intact, and they are worried about losing any of their parents. In this context, they may develop behaviors that check that their parents are always at home in the morning and evening. When parents divorce at this age, these children usually have a strong feeling of powerlessness, anger, loneliness and deprivation (Grych & Fincham, 2001).

They strongly advocated for their parents’ reunion and fear replacement. They may also develop a distressing behavior to one of their parents. Divorce also affects these children’s school performance since they are always thinking about their parents’ reunion. However, school-age children usually adapt to their parents’ separation more quickly than preschool children do (Grych & Fincham, 2001). AdolescentAt this age, teens children are capable of making discrete decisions in consultation with adults.

They have a better understanding of relationships more than other age groups do, and they can be pleased or angered with their parents’ actions (Clarke-Stewart & Brentano, 2008). They also wish to make their own decisions and receive little influence from their parents. Divorce also affects the adolescents just like other age groups. After divorce, they are noted to exhibit poorer academic performance, lower self-esteem, strong anger and depression more than their peers from non-divorced families (Clarke-Stewart & Brentano, 2008).

They welcome divorce with a lot of pain, but they are capable of understanding and copping up with the situation without consulting with a third party. Minimizing Divorce and Helping the Affected ChildrenIn order to reduce the divorce rate across different families, parents should learn on how to understand each other and solve problems whenever they arise. They need to learn how to ease stress, as it is what leads to incompatibility, lack of respect, lack of trust, lack of understanding, and inability to handle finances (Berns, 2010).

Infidelity is the other leading cause of divorce. Therefore, married couples should always learn on how to please each other so that none of them does anything tempting behind the other’s back. The leading solutions to solve the trauma experienced by children after abortion are to focus on minimizing their involvement and stress. Divorced parents should also take time and create a stable environment by frequently explaining to their children why they decided to separate. This is achieved by picking on something simple and honest like “we cannot live together anymore” (Berns, 2010).

Divorced parents should always remind their children that they are still loved, and they will always be taken care of just like before. While explaining the reasons for the divorce, parents should avoid blaming one another, but have a common reason for the explanation. As a professional counselor, I would advise divorced parties to develop more trust, tolerance and empathy from the existing differences. They should also have the ability to exhibit certain cognitive strategies and behaviors necessary for assisting the children to cope up with the post-divorce problems.

ReferencesBerns, R. (2010). Child, family, school, community: Socialization and support. Belmont, CA: Wadsworth/Cengage Learning.Clarke-Stewart, A., & Brentano, C. (2008). Divorce: Causes and consequences. New Haven, Conn: Yale University Press.Grych, J. H., & Fincham, F. D. (2001). Interparental conflict and child development: Theory, research and application. New York: Cambridge University Press.