Psychology Of Aging - Essay Example

? Interview Paper Assignment Introduction For my assignment on conducting interviews, I decided to interview Frank, a 74 year old war veteran who had participated in the Vietnamese war. The man holds a respectable position in his community due to his ripe old age and the manner in which he conducts his affairs. He does not at any one time seek to cross wires with anyone, he always keeps to himself. The only time you will ever see Frank lively is his he gets a visit from his war buddies. In such happen-stance, Frank will be seen with a rare smile as a far-away look engulf his eyes, perhaps going down memory lane. I sought to explore his life during and after the war. Frank let me into his life knowing full well the purpose for which I possessed and for that I am eternally grateful. I chose Frank for the interview for he is a close family friend and I believed his recounting of events would be truthful. I first broached the subject of the interview to him on the 9th of April 2013. He would later tell me that no one had ever asked him about his life, made him feel special. That notwithstanding, he was apprehensive at first about the proposed content of the interview. I went out of my way to placate and reassure him that the interview was to be conducted in very good taste and he was free to take it in any direction he wished. We agreed that the interview was to be conducted on the 13th of April 2013. This would give us both ample time to prepare for the interview; on my part plan the interview process and for Frank organize his thoughts. Actual Interview I knocked on Frank’s doors on the morning of 13th of April 2013. “Come in,” he said. “I have not had visitors in this place in a while so please forgive the mess.” He chuckled. I took it to be that he was making light comments to put himself at ease because the house was impeccably maintained. I asked him about the cleanliness of the house and he said “A woman always comes twice a week to ensure that everything runs smoothly in this house. She is paid for by one of my children. She is a very hardworking woman, but frankly, I think they pay her too much, what with their being no work to do at any time in this house. You see, I am a very neat kind of guy, always cleaning after myself, the whole nine yards. I don’t expect from anyone what I don’t demand of myself. Cleanliness and hard work go hand in hand and I am proud to be able to do both with ease…” he paused at this point and took a seat which I suspected was his usual seat owing to the fact that it showed signs of being worn out more than the other seats. I decided to seize the moment and ask him the most basic question of the interview. “Who is Frank?” This was followed by a short burst of laughter with a spout of coughing. “That young man is a loaded question. Frank cannot be defined in one seating; that would take too many ass cramps, pardon my French. Well, I was born way before my time, into a family bereft with poverty and grief. My dad used to drink you see, this made him the worst human you could ever imagine. Every chance he got, he set upon my brothers and myself with his waist hide. That would be a belt in this time. He was thorough in doing so, sometimes I wondered if he put the same thoroughness into actual hard work how far we would go as a family. Bless his soul he was good for one thing though, he could give the best advice. He had this way with words that made one look into oneself and reflect as to what one wanted to become in life. That is exactly what happened in my case with me. He sat me down one late afternoon in my early teens and told me that I needed to enlist. That would give me structure. He said that my older brothers had become village jokers and that was not good for the family. I wonder where they got that from….” He said this with a slap on his thigh followed by thunderous laughter. “So your father is the one who made you enlist?” I asked. “Well, he sort of played a part in my decision to enlist. The other part was played by my environment. You see, everyone who grew up in our village and did not leave ended up a bum. I wanted more for myself. I always thought that the good Lord put me on this earth for a purpose, and by jolly I wanted to realize that purpose. So when the war came about, I decided to enlist. My father’s talk served as impetus to an already made up mind. I remember the day I went for the war like it was yesterday, changed my life forever…” I saw that he was getting misty eyed with his voice cracking and realized that I had struck an emotional chord. I feared that he might break down and render the interview over but his next words surprised me. His voice steadied and eyes cleared and then he said “We should have won that war. They were not even organized and trained in the art of warfare, just farmers taking up arms. The one thing that I will always respect them for is that they were willing to die for their country. We were an unprepared lot, singing and making merry into the night. We were young and dumb soldiers who had gone in there with the wrong idea of what a war was. They gave us a run for our money. I remember people dying in the swamps. Daily, it was a blood bath. Each group slaughtered the other without remorse. We felt as if God had deserted us. It was a chilling time for everybody concerned. Left scars that to this day that will never be healed even through time. That sought of period does weird things to the psyche of a man…” he trailed off. I decided to give him a break to recollect himself. He took a ten minutes break during which he told me to make him a cup of coffee. I did that after which he continued, “I was lucky enough to leave the war behind. I was brought back home because I got shot on my right leg. Even though it was sad leaving my comrades behind, I welcomed the idea of home. It represented peace. I had this notion in my head that I would come back and continue with my life where I had left off. Boy was I wrong. The first thing that had changed was the whole nation. Everyone was fighting for survival and their rights. Soldiers were forgotten. Personally, I never got but a dime from the government…” At this point, he paused and snorted, then went on … “It was a sad state of affairs I tell you. During this period when I was in hospital, I met a dame, Zaphra. She was a nurse who took very good care of me. I decided to make her my wife. Together we bore 4 children into this world. Every day I thank the good Lord for giving me time with that woman. Those my friend, were the best years of my life.” There was a very long pause during which I thought that he had fallen asleep or decided to end the interview. Just when I was about to open my mouth and speak, he said “She passed on ten years ago. She lost her battle with cancer. I tried to give her the best care I could during her illness and in her last days. I believe that she went on while being at peace with herself and with us her family. God help me I lived that woman…” he sniffed and a tear rolled down his cheek. I saw that he had become overcome with emotion and so I decided to pursue a different line of questioning. “Frank, I am very sorry for your loss but you must have had countless beautiful memories with Zaphra and your kids after all those years of marriage. Tell me some of them.” His eyes lit up and he started. “Boy oh boy did we have the time of our lives. We went everywhere and did everything. I remember at one time we scaled Mt. Kilimanjaro. All six of us and my bad leg….” He followed this with hearty laughter. He kept laughing and I saw this as an opportunity to capitalize on his good mood. “I have seen that you have a lot of buddies, tell me about them. “Those rascals, who can call them buddies. They only show up when they want money.” He said with a playful tone. “They make appearances like the seasons, always on time, never late. One could even think they have nothing better to do than disturb an old man…” he laughed. “Anyway, I love them for it. We get together and reminisce of the good old times, when life was simpler. All you had to do was write a letter to pass information, not all these gadgets that they young generation calls hip. I say technology will be the death of us, making everyone rushed in everything they are doing, always seeking to meet a deadline. Sometimes it is okay to stop and smell the flowers you know, that is how you enjoy life. The young generation can learn a lot from us guys who are called old. We knew how to live my friend; we lived and loved with every bit of ourselves. Do you have any more questions, I feel like I have said too much already.” “You haven’t said much enough Frank. You seem to have lived a very interesting life I must say. I envy your time. Let me ask though, do you face any problems with your health?” “Other than my bad leg, my health is typical of every old man; bad…” he broke into laughter. “Most of the days I am lucky to be alive, and that is saying much. I have pains wracking my body which I think are there to remind me of the good old days. My joints hurt, I think it is arthritis and I feel as if even the slightest wind can sweep me off my feet. Other than that I am just swell, counting my blessings, burying my friends, you know how it is for us old folk.” I thanked Frank for letting me interview him at such length enabling him to provide me the much needed insight into his life. I promised to always check up on him to see how he is faring on and with that we bade each other farewell. On reflection of the whole interviewing process, I discovered that the young generation had a lot to thank the older generation for, at the same time learning from them. There is a wealth of character in the older generation that is lacking in the younger generation based on Frank’s admission. I knew that I had found a friend who would be a valuable resource as I seek to grow in this world because he proved to me that was an invaluable resource of both intellect and poise. For anyone else seeking to interview an individual of above 65, the person should realize that the individual being interviewed is in most cases of a frail mind and disposition and should therefore be handled with care. They should go about the interview questions at a pace that appears to accommodate the interviewee. Above all, at all times, they should seek to reassure the interviewee at each juncture that they are doing okay so that the interviewee may garner the much needed confidence to keep on with the interview (Lausberg). Reference Lausberg, D. Psychology Of Aging. Pennsylvania: University of Pittsburgh. Read More