Analysis of Interviews with Parents - Essay Example

? Parent Interview Parent Interview Part I How old is your child/children? My child is fifteen years old. 2. How is adolescence different from the elementary school years for your child? What changes have you seen in them? During her elementary school years, my child was more dependent on me but now he wants to be more independent. There are also the physical changes that are part of puberty. 3. How has your relationship changed since your child has entered adolescence? Give examples of how this has changed. I feel that my daughter was closer to me when she was younger than now in her adolescent years. Whereas before when she arrives from school she would often talk about what happened in school that day, now she seldom talks about how her day was. She does not confide much to me unlike when she was younger. 4. What are some boundaries and rules you have set up for your teen? What do you do if they break or a rule or disrespect a boundary? I expect my daughter to go straight home after school. If she wants to go somewhere with her friends, she should ask permission first. I also told her not to have any serious relationship first, instead prioritize her studies. If she breaks a rule, she is grounded for several days depending on the severity of the misbehavior. That means that she cannot go out on parties or go to the mall with her friends. 5. Is your teen involved in a romantic relationship? Do they go on dates? What do the dates consist of? She does not have any romantic relationship at present. Yes, she goes on dates but I only allow group dates. Eating out and watching movies are the activities they do on their group dates. 6. What is the greatest challenge you face in regards to your relationship with your adolescent? The greatest challenge is giving her more freedom yet I want her to know her limits. Another challenge is encouraging her to be more open with me and confiding to me her problems. 7. What is your child’s feeling toward his friendships? Do you think these friendships have a major influence on him/her? If so give some examples? My child is very close to her friends in school. Yes, I think that these friendships have a major influence on her. They choose the same style of clothes. They also have the same hobbies such as playing bowling or tennis. If one of her friend has a new cell phone, she would request me to buy her the same. 8. How has the world changed from the time you were a teen? What then are some new challenges your teen will face that you did not? Life was simpler then when I was a teen. There were fewer distractions. There were no gadgets such as cellular phones, iPods, iPads, MP3 players or laptops which rule the lives of teens today. Some of the new challenges that our teens face which we did not face are issues such as cyberbullying or the effects of the internet age. There is too much information that is available to them with just a click of a finger that there is a danger that they may not be able to properly filter the good and bad information. There is the risk too of being overly engrossed at social media sites such as Facebook and Twitter which might distract them from their studies. 9. Does your child have what you would consider good or poor self-esteem? Describe how you think they perceive themselves? My child has a good self-esteem. She is an outstanding student, a member of the school band and a varsity volleyball player. These all contribute to boost her ego. I think she perceives herself as a very responsible student and an obedient child. 10. How do you cope with the anxiety and pressures that come with parenting an adolescent? I cope with the pressures of parenting an adolescent by talking with other parents and comparing notes with them. I do some research regarding how I should relate with an adolescent child. I also try to open the lines of communication between us and be more open to the changes that set in during these years. 11. Do you sometimes feel that you adolescent child lack respect? How do you respond to this? Yes, I sometimes feel that my daughter does not respect me especially when I ask her to do something which she does not like. She answers back and even raises her voice. I respond to this action by being calm. I try to control myself because if I shout back at her the more she will feel agitated. 12. Do you have difficulty in asking your adolescent child to help in household chores? If so, how do you resolve this? There are times when it easy for me to assign a chore to my child especially when she is asking something from me, like a new dress or if she wants to go out with her friends. However, there are occasions too when I end up nagging and arguing with her just to do a chore. I resolved this issue by discussing it with her during one of our bonding time. We agreed that I will assign to her a certain chore which she is required to do every day like bringing out the trash. There will be chores that she will do only during weekends. I also lowered my expectations of her so in that way I do not get frustrated. 13. Do you think that it is necessary for you to get to know your child’s friends? Why? Yes, it is important that parents know who their child’s friends are especially in their adolescent years. It is at this stage when they spend more time with their friends than their parents. If one does not take an effort at knowing who the friends of his children are, there is a danger that she might be going with friends who are a bad influence on her. Part II 1. What parental style do you think the parent in the interview has? The parenting style adapted by the parent interviewed is a combination of authoritative and permissive style. 2. Is this style consistent or do you think it changes as a consequence to the child’s behavior? I think that the style will change depending on the child’s behavior. If the child is the type who needs much guidance, then the authoritative style will be adapted. If the child is responsible enough to make wise decisions, then the permissive style can be adapted. 3. What seems to be the greatest concern this parent has with his/her child? How does this manifest in the parent-child relationship? According to the textbook, is this common? The greatest concern of this parent seems to be that of being able to communicate effectively with her daughter. She wants to keep an open line between them. This is very common among parents of adolescents. Pre-adolescent aged children are closer to their parents but as they grow older they seem to be closer to their friends. Part III 1. What parenting style do you believe is the best and why? I believe that there is no best parenting style. A combination of the styles must be used depending on the situation, the personality of the child and the environment where one lives. 2. How do you (the parent) balance the relationship with the adolescent and the enforcing the rules of the house? I balance the relationship with the adolescent by respecting their privacy. I do not just impose what I want, but rather I listen to their opinions and suggestions too. Before making the rules I discuss it with them first and explain why such a rule is being imposed. The rules that we have are reasonable and not so stringent. I give them rewards when they do something good and I punish them appropriately when they do something wrong. 3. How does a Christian Worldview affect the way you parent your adolescents. The Christian Worldview affects the way I parent my children because I try to imitate God in the manner I treat my children. Like God, I want to be viewed as a parent who is loving, just, merciful and forgiving. I also teach them Christian values which hopefully they can impart to their children someday. 4. How would you approach a child that has a particular issue? Use one of these as a hypothetical example: drugs, dating boundaries, pornography, etc. Write a paragraph on how you would approach this child. If I learned that my child was using drugs, the first thing that I should do is to stay calm. I will discuss with my husband regarding the approach we should take. We will prepare ourselves for denials, excuses and a probable rage. We should be prepared to present our evidence about his drug use. We will avoid being judgmental, instead offer our help and support for him. We will set the rules and the consequences of his behavior. Monitoring of his activities will be done on a regular basis. We will also encourage him to engage in activities such as sports or other healthy hobbies. Lastly, if we think we cannot handle the situation properly, we will ask the help of people who are authorities in such cases. 5. How would/do you cope with the anxieties and pressures that come with parenting an adolescent? I cope with the anxieties and pressures of parenting by having time for myself. During times when I am so stressed with problems with my children, I go out of the house. I sometimes go to the gym or to the mall to relieve me of the stress. I spend some time away from home. Another way of coping is by talking with other parents who have adolescent kids too. We share our experiences with each other; thus, learning from each other. I schedule regular “dates” with my children so we can develop a closer relationship. I give them their own private space so as not to “suffocate” them with my rules. Read More