Sensitive Mothering - Essay Example

of Sensitive Mothering Introduction to Sensitive Mothering A mother plays an important role in the life of a child, as they are fully responsible for their grooming and up-bringing. It is the mother who, through her love, care and support, guides her child and protects it from all the evils of the world. Even though, it is not only the responsibility of a mother but the whole family is responsible in the upbringing of the child, including father and other maternal and paternal family members. But generally, it is the mother who showers her love on her child, and due to this, a strong relation builds between the child and mother. With respect to this, mothering is referred to as a mother’s style of interaction with her child. A mother should be available to the child and should overcome all the needs of the child. Generally, it is stated that a mother’s love and sensitivity creates a harmony among the two bodies and due to this mother-infant relationship is formed (Barnes, 1995). A mother should not only cater to the child needs but she must be sensitive, i.e. she must have the capabilities to correctly interpret her child’s signals, respond to them promptly and appropriately, and encounter fully to her child’s needs. Moreover, it is the mother’s early interaction with the child that leads to behavioral issues. A sensitive mother will produce socialized and self regulated children. Moreover, mothers who are more sensitive and responsive to a child will form a secure, adaptive attachment with their child. Whereas an insensitive mother who rejects or is under involved with her child development, will form an unsecured bond with her child. According to the research, it has also been seen that sensitive mothers do not only have more close relation with their child, but their infants are more dependant on their mothers as compared to any other. The child is not only less dependant on the teachers but they are also more competent with their peers and have a more cooperative attitude with adults as children. Thus a sensitive mother not only grooms its child but also builds self-confidence. Sensitive mothering also plays an important role in the child’s pro social and anti social behavior. Sensitive mothers have a strong association with a child’s obedience, impulse control, and self assertion. On the other hand, an insensitive mother is responsible for a child’s negative actions, because lack of love and care from mothers develop disobedience, rebellious and noncompliance nature within a child. Due to this it can be stated that sensitive mothering is extremely important in building a positive emotional base among a child. Bowlby’s Attachment Theory & Ainsworth Studies John Bowlby was the originator of Attachment Theory; he believed that those parents or caregivers who form a close attachment with their children in the early time period create a tremendous positive impact on their children throughout their lives. Bowlby described attachment as “lasting psychological connectedness between human beings” (Bowlby, 1969). But the basic crust behind his theory was that, those mothers who are responsive and insensitive to their child’s needs establish a security among their child. Due to this the child depends upon the caregiver and this develops a secure base for the infant and helps him explore the world with much more confidence. Moreover, attachment is not only important in providing security and building emotional relationships, but it also aids in survival (Cherry, 2010). Bowlby was a strong supporter of sensitive mothering as he stated within his theory, that usually a mother forms a strong attachment with the child and the best results are achieved within the first year. If a mother is insensitive in the first 6 months then the attachment cannot be created because the most crucial period of attachment lies between 6 to 24 months, and if, during this time period, mothers are insensitive to their child, they will fail to build a strong affiliation and love with their child for the rest of their life. As already mentioned above that mothers play an important role in the life of a child, thus sensitive mother forms a strong base to a child’s positive social, emotional, and intellectual development (Somerville, 2008). Even though the basic concept was formulated by John Bowlby but Mary Ainsworth’s contribution in this theory was immense. She stated that caregiver (mother) acts as a secure base for a child which helps them to explore the world. Further, she originated the concept of maternal sensitivity to infant signals and stated its role in developing infant-mother attachment patterns. She strongly believed that a child loves his mother because she satisfies his needs (Bretherton, 1998). She gave the concept of ‘strange situation’ in which she highlighted the effects of attachment on behavior. Due to this she declared that there were three major styles of attachment; secure attachment, ambivalence-insecure attachment, and accident-insecure attachment. These attachment styles have a great impact on the behaviors of the infant in their later life. As those children who are unable to form early attachments in their lives or those children who have insensitive mothers, often experience oppositional-defiant disorder, conduct disorder, or post traumatic stress disorder (Cherry, 2010). Moreover in her studies, she found a strong correlation between secure attachment and maternal sensitivity. She pointed out that sensitive mothers are more securely attached while less sensitive mothers are more insecure. She also stated that mother’s breast-feeding had a high correlation with infant’s security. As those mothers who faced difficulty in adjusting to their child’s signals and indications, their child often choked, spitted, and struggled hard (Bretherton, 1998). Thus on the basis of their contribution it can be stated that attachment relationships play an important role in the child’s subsequent development and generally it’s the mother’s sensitivity that brings about such developments within the child. Moreover, research also states that a child develops internal working models of close relationships that influence their future interactions with wide range of people. Children who have relatively high secure attachment become flexible, outgoing, skilled, and high esteemed (Weiten, 2008). Sensitive Mothering Impacts Quality of Attachment John Bowlby also showed a high correlation between sensitive mothering and quality of attachment. He stated that experiences and repeated interactions between the child and mother, influences the quality of attachment relationship. High sensitivity towards child’s social and emotional needs would lead to high quality of attachment, because a child will feel safe and thus a secure and bounded relation will be created (Somerville, 2009). Erikson’s Relevant Psychological Stage of Personality Development Erikson was also a strong supporter of mother sensitivity and in his psychological development theory; ‘the eight stages of human development’ he clearly mentions that mother’s sensitive responsiveness builds trust and confidence with the child. He stated “The infant must come to feel that his basic trust in himself and in the world……will not be jeopardized by his sudden violent wish to have a choice” (Erickson, 1950, 85). Within his theory he gave eight psychological crises stages; Trust Vs mistrust, autonomy Vs shame and doubt , initiative Vs guilt, industry Vs Inferiority, intimacy Vs Isolation, Generativity Vs Stagnation and integrity Vs Despair. Thus all these different stages of personality development of a child can be manipulated if sensitive mothering is not entailed in the child’s upbringing. These eight stages reveal that mother’s sensitivity is very important because it helps the child lead a better life. Thus with respect to this theory Erickson emphasized that mothers play an important role in developing a child’s personality. As in first year of life a child learns trust but this would only be possible if he would experience a bounded relation in his childhood. Similarly in the second and third year of life, a child develops independence and autonomy but this is only possible if parents allow their children this liberty, i.e. sensitive parenting is important in this phase as well (Abbott, 2001). Same is the case with the rest of the stages, as a child will develop these personality characteristics if sensitive parenting/ sensitive mothering will be entailed within the child development. Early Attachment Impacts Social & Emotional Development of 3-5 Year Child and Adults The researchers state that a strong bounded relation between a child and a mother is created within the first year, generally in 6 months’ time period. This attachment leads to social and emotional development of a child in the later years. It is generally seen that a child who experiences an early attachment with his mother generally develops a more secure and stable future not only in their early phase of life but also in their later life. Attachment creates an emotional and between the two persons in which they satisfy the need for security, contact and affection. Infants, who have early attachment with their mothers, are often more persistent, curious, independent, and have leadership qualities within their preschool age. They also have better relations with their peers and other adults and experience few negative emotions while having more positive emotions. Similar is the pattern with middle childhood children, as these children exhibit positive moods, they can easily cope with stress and experience better regulation of their emotions. Studies also reveal that the strong early attachments lead to advanced cognitive development with the child in his childhood and even at adolescence stage. Further, these early attachments with the child help them in their later life and leads to romantic relationships in their adulthood, while creating positive impact on their social and emotional life (Weiten, 2008). Furthermore Ruth P. Newton (2009) in his interview stated that child’s emotions are critical to cognitive development. An emotionally deregulated child facing problems in learning would be confused, fearful, and would lack confidence. On the other hand, an emotionally regulated child would perform great in school as well as in social environment, because his support would develop strong confidence and security within him. Thus early childhood attachments not only affect children in their infancy years of school life but also help them groom for their later lives. Ruth P. Newton also stated that sensitive parenting also leads to primary attachment to positive motions that affect the child’s nervous system and also develop qualities within the child such as empathy, creativity, intuition as well as morality. Thus it can be concluded that early attachments play a major role in creating social and emotional development in both childhood and adults. Conclusion Sensitive mothering is extremely important in the social and emotional development of a child because it is the mother’s upbringing that leads a child to become successful in the future. Sensitive mothering not only builds confidence among the child at the very early childhood but also develops strong personality traits that distinguish them from others. The developments within the child start from the very early stage, i.e. from its birth. The child who experiences sensitivity in his/her early childhood often experiences good social contacts; he/she is friendly, social competent, and builds strong and positive emotions. Furthermore, this child also entails good personality characteristics within himself. This all has been referred from the main theories mentioned above, i.e.John Bowlby, Mary Ainsworth and Erickson. All these three clearly stated that sensitive mothering creates positive social, emotional and good personality with in the child. REFERENCES Abbott, T. (2001) Social and Personality Development, Illustrated Edition, Rutledge, Available http://books.google.com.pk/books?id=KmDKSvVL_EYC&dq=Erikson%E2%80%99s+relevant+psychological+stage+of+personality+development&source=gbs_navlinks_s [21 April 2010] Barnes, P. (1995) Personal, Social And Developmental Of Children , Illustrated Edition, Wiley-Blackwell, Available http://books.google.com.pk/books?id=gYZ-uEIsWP8C&pg=PA17&lpg=PA17&dq=sensitive+mothering&source=bl&ots=zA2sN6MTJR&sig=_TEqn9VefF-Yy6MzJQuBE-RCQy4&hl=en&ei=1dHNS4jkGoi0rAec95mkAQ&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=9&ved=0CC4Q6AEwCA#v=onepage&q=sensitive%20mothering&f=false [21 April 2010] Bretherton, I. (1992) The Origin Of Attachment Theory: John Bowlby And Mary Ainsworth, Developmental Psychology, 28, 759-775. Cherry, K. (2010) Attachment Theory, Available http://psychology.about.com/od/loveandattraction/a/attachment01.htm [21 April 2010] Grusec, J.E and Hastings, P.D. (2007) Handbook of Socialization: Theory And Research, Illustrated Edition. Guilford Press, Available: http://books.google.com.pk/books?id=x6-b3M41nloC&pg=PA465&dq=Erikson%E2%80%99s+relevant+psychological+stage+of+personality+development+and+sensitive+mothering&hl=en&ei=gjzPS7OYO4eyrAeRudyOAQ&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=5&ved=0CEUQ6AEwBA#v=onepage&q&f=false [21 April 2010] Ruth P. Newton, 2009, Interview Attachment Connection, Available: http://www.newharbinger.com/InterviewAttachmentConnection/tabid/282/Default.aspx [21 April 2010] Somerville, C. (2009) Attachment and Bowlby- John Bowlby’s Theory of Attachment, Available http://www.bukisa.com/articles/119439_attachment-and-bowlby-john-bowlbys-theory-of-attachment [21 April 2010] Weiton, W. (2008) Psychology: Themes And Variation, 8th edition, Cengage Learning, Available http://books.google.com.pk/books?id=sILajOhJpOsC&pg=PT496&dq=sensitive+mothering+positive+emotions&hl=en&ei=KgTPS_rICMS4rAfLuP2oAQ&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=9&ved=0CFoQ6AEwCA#v=onepage&q&f=false [21 April 2010] Read More