Evaluating My Marriage - Essay Example

Thus, it was both interesting and exciting to answer the self-test since it will help me understand what style do we have as a couple. The result yielded that we have a validating marriage style. Although, there also moments that we both adopt the conflict-avoiding mode ( especially my spouse) since his upbringing is used to a passive-submissive environment. My marriage like any other marriage has its own high and low points. At times, things can be so routine that one would not even notice a partner’s new haircut especially if both are preoccupied with busy careers.

Sometimes, it is laced with excitement as special occasions are celebrated and simple acts of endearment are sent by one partner by calling and asking : how’s your day?”. These experiences makes me agree with Gottman when he argued that : funny recalling that I was the one who mostly start a fight especially when I become very jealous. I am jealous when he spends more time with his friends, his work or even with his parents. When this happens, my spouse and I sit down together and discuss the roots of my jealousy ( most are invalid, however).

Nevertheless, the important thing about this sensitive issue is that our willingness as a couple to calmly sort out an issue that affects us. Aside from jealousy, there are also other important issues like money, sex, and values that my spouse and I should agree on. It must be remembered that two people in a marriage come from very different backgrounds that could really intensify a conflict, much like diversity in a working environment. The only difference is that one must not quit since marriage is a commitment.

In order for that commitment to be maintained, we came up with a plan that would pave way for a more intense marital relationship. Some contents of these plan were learned from experience while others are from advice of fellow couples. 1. The first important thing to do is involve God in your relationship. Having the