Memorable Story of the Family Legacy - Essay Example

Memorable Story It is said that family legacies are found within the individual journals or family memories. These are stories of lifetimes that often leave an account of an important event in a persons life history. At my young age, I have already experienced the equivalent of a lifetime of events, this essay will share one of those events. During my lifetime, I have never had to give any thought to the possibility of losing a relative. Ive have had my nucleus and extended family within my reach, with all of them properly represented in living form. I have always treasured the memories that we create and never once thought to think of them as mortal, meaning I never thought that I would ever have to face losing one of them to death. My nucleus family has always been complete. As far back as I could remember, we had always been composed of my complete set of parents, my sister, and my brother. At least that was how our family existed until 2002. My brother suffered a debilitating illness that took his life a couple of months ago. He had a heart attack that left him crippled and in need of heart surgery within the week of his attack. I witnessed my brother in constant pain and requiring drugs to fight off the agonizing pain. He often kept his eyes shut, not wanting us to see inside of him where he was battling even greater pain. We spent our time by his bedside. Consoling him by holding his hands and wiping the sweat of his pain from his brow as he lay in confinement at the hospital. Eventually, he worked up the strength to try and speak to us during our visits. He would often ask me how I was doing and if I had any new plans for the week. He also asked my sister the same thing. We could tell that he was truly interested in learning about our activities but the pain was preventing him from totally involving himself in our stories. My sister tried to entertain him by telling him about her latest handicraft projects. Anything from loom bands to bags that she created from recycled paper helped her connect with him. While he was also interested in my activities, he had always considered my sister special, oftentimes calling her his “lovely blessed messenger”. I knew that he cherished his moments with her more than those he spent with me. As I watched him agonizing in bed though, I wondered how he could still consider her a blessed messenger. To me, that meant she was supposed to bring him peace, not pain. Yet, every time we asked him if he was in pain he would respond “No, I am fine.” and then turn his head away, obviously trying to hide the grimace on his face. He never complained about his life when he was alright, and he wasnt about to begin now, not on his deathbed. He let us know that he was sad about having to have the operation though. “I dont think I am strong enough to survive it yet. I wish they would wait some more.” he shared with us after one of his specialist doctor visits. A typical male, he was never one for drama. His talent for mischief and comedy still found a way to shine through in his condition. He still did his best to make everyone laugh even though his life force was beginning to wane. As the 2nd of November passed this year, I could not help but remember my brother who passed away on the same day last year in a sea of giggles and tears. Just like he wanted. I remember that our whole family and nucleus family gathered at the hospital during his final moments, giving us the strength and support that we needed to let him go. Let him go. The song makes is sound easier than it really is. After my brother took his final breath, I ran out of the hospital, into the garden where he, my sister, and I often spent a few minutes each visiting day with each other, crying silent tears. I was filled with sorrow and loneliness for my brother. Each time I glanced at the bench where we sat watching the Cherry tree blossoms, the pain inside me swelled. It was only a matter of moments before my sister was there beside me, consoling me, being the “blessed messenger” that my brother knew she was. Now, she was mine. Family Rituals Coming from a Muslim background, the rituals that my family engages in are always in line with our Muslim faith and traditions. I will discuss some of our rituals below: Prayer: Prayer for us is a blend of physical movements and verbal truisms. It is almost yoga like in practice because of the sense of calm, peace, and humility that we achieve during this act of worship to God. The prayer cannot be interrupted for any reason because of the continuous movements and adages that the act of prayer requires in order to quote the book of Islam and the prayers of thanks and celebration for all we have received in life. Fasting: Fasting is the ultimate form of self sacrifice in our religion. We refrain from partaking of life sustaining food for most part of the day and totally avoid avoid having sex for the duration of the fast. From dusk till dawn, we consistently follow the Ramadan requirements, this goes on for one whole month based on the lunar cycle. Pilgrimage: The Hajj is one of the most important transition events from childhood to adulthood for a Muslim male. It is the physical and spiritual journey he must make to the sacred Makah City in Saudi Arabia in order to complete the customs and traditions of Muslim men when they come of age. Charity: Charity is an important part of Muslim life because we are taught to share our blessings with the needy. We are required to share a portion of our blessings as part of a collection, at least 2 percent of our savings every year. This is a donation not based on wealth but rather the availability of cash funds. Purification: The “Wudu” or act of cleansing is performed during certain customs and before every prayer. By washing certain body parts, we cleanse ourselves and make ourselves ready to face God in prayer. Due to the requirements of 5 prayers during different times during the day, we need to achieve a certain level of cleanliness in order to be worthy of our prayer actions and pleas. Creature Sacrifice: When one hears the term “Animal Sacrifice” it tends to connote some barbaric human act to end the life of an animal. That may be true for some people, but not for Muslims who need to practice certain rituals in “reparation” for the death of the animal. This includes a prayer to God prior to the sacrifice because he has given us the right to sacrifice the animal for our continued survival. Dialectical Tension Examples Social improvement can only be achieved by Dialect Tensions which determine the life of a person through say, integration and separation from society. These tensions help to determine our friendships and closeness to people along with our need for independence and autonomy. A perfect balance of these criteria result in a balanced relationship. I view this as the most important aspect of family life since we spend most of our childhood relying upon our parents decision making. As we mature though, we wish to become independent of them and for a relaxation of their parental power over us, causing tension in the relationship. This is something that I experienced first hand when I asked my parents for permission to come to the U.S. for higher studies. I was finally free of my parents once they agreed, but I was still afraid to be living so far away from them. Film Analysis Helmed by Gregory Nava, the film “My Family” presents the lives of the Mexican-American Sanchez family over three eras. Opening with a scene from the 1930s, the movie presents the battles that Jacob and Maria needed to overcome as they worked on their marriage, struggling to get away from a gang. Their struggles continue well into the 1960s when their own child begins to raise his own family with his own problems. The movie is a telling tale of sadness and joy, bringing their audience both to tears and laughter during touching moments in the film. This is understandable as the audience can easily relate to the world that the movie makers have opened up to them. It is an American story, and a Mexican story just the same. It is the story of every Mexican living in America today. It is a film that relates to my family and reminds me of the way my own parents had fight their battles and my battles to help me get to where I am today. Metaphor Statement "Life is a treasured ownership, demise is an inexorable misfortune.." This metaphor best represents the concealed message within it. A correlation and a statement that needs to be analyzed in order to discover what it truly represents. Its contrasting analogy may seem like a true representation but in contrast, it is merely the perception of the piece using analogy that presents a different, yet similar representation. The following are some examples of metaphors from my community: He swam in the ocean of precious stones His sash was a snake twisting around his waist Affection is a developing festoon Summary Statement The family structure has changed over the centuries. These days, the family as a unit ends up being questioned for its nature, capacity, and structure. These days, a family need not be composed of the nucleus family of heterosexual parents living under the same roof guided by the rules of marriage. That is why Islam tends to remain a purist in this aspect. Islam tries to preserve the family unit with matrimony at its center. My intention in writing this piece is to explain what a family means to Muslims. Muslims are not prescriptive in this sense since the only purpose of this paper is to help clinicians understand what makes a Muslim family different. In a Muslim family, the father is the unquestionable head and the rituals we perform help us bond as a family unit. Read More