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Human sexuality - Essay Example

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This paper will explore the central ideas in differentiation, intimacy, holding onto you and normal marriage sadism. …
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Human sexuality
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Download file to see previous pages Two basic forces of life drive differentiation, especially distinctiveness and togetherness. Individuality helps individuals to be themselves by creating their identities as they follow certain directions. It is fundamental to acknowledge that togetherness is an act of pushing oneself to other people’s directions making one part of a group. Individuality and togetherness have balanced and healthy expressions when fused together. These two important components of differentiation affect relationships in several dramatic ways especially by providing an individual with ability to maintain his self-sense when he is either physically or emotionally close to others. It becomes more challenging when the persons are closely important to the individual. During pressure, especially when there is intense lobbying for conformity from friends and family members, differentiation enables one to maintain his course and direction. A person who is not capable of undergoing emotional fusion is often labeled as emotionally fuse (Schnarch, 2009).
Differentiation also provides an individual with the ability to maintain his self-sense during times when his or her partner is away especially during the early periods of a relationship. In as much as an individual values his contact with the partner, he must never allow himself to fall apart when alone. It is not similar to individualism because it provides one with the ability to find equilibrium between individuality and togetherness. A person who is differentiated is not only strong but also permeable. Regardless of manipulation and moldings from a partner, a differentiated individual can still afford to remain collected and calm. This individual would be able to change and retain his identity with admirable values and cores. However, differentiation should not be mistaken as the absence of emotions or feelings. One can easily connect with his partner without being afraid of his emotions. The solution entails conduct an effective subjective and objective evaluation of emotions. Additionally, differentiation is a type of self-determination that does not imply to any kind of selfishness. One can choose to be guided by self-interests of his partner at the expense of his own agenda. This does not mean that he is under rule from the other. A differentiated person recognizes the fact that people are different in nature and therefore have different interests. He must appreciate what these people want for themselves. Although, various ways of expressing love are evident, differentiation is a distinct way of articulating love. It is argued as a noble concept that one could partake. In couple’s therapy, differentiation can enable each partner to understand themselves in terms of both strengths and limitations and use constituting factors to enhance their marriage (Charlton & Yalom, 1997). Intimacy Intimacy is an experience that makes one aware that he is separate from his partner though he has parts and feelings that need sharing. It normally accompanies communication where each partner freely discloses personal information to the other. However, communication can exist without intimacy, especially in situations where people are engaged in verbal exchanges. Communication is not confined to absence of exchanges between couples because it entails any interaction that makes partners in marriage feel bad though this is poor communication. This implies that intimacy cannot be measured using communication if messages being ...Download file to see next pagesRead More
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