Parents Can Make or Break Their Children - Essay Example

According to Dr. Alvin F. Poussaint, "Most children need their parent's help and encouragement to discover the satisfaction of using their own imaginations" (Thoughts for Today). Psychological development of children is as important as the physical development. Many parents- even the educated parents- concentrate more on the physical development of the children and give less importance to the psychological or emotional development. Such parents believe that their duty remains only in giving proper food, clothing, and shelter to the children till they become adults.

In fact parents’ love, care and attention are more important to the children than food or other physical things. Growing children do not know how to adapt to its surrounding. He will look suspiciously or anxiously at all new things which may catch his attention. The presence of parents and their advice will help the children in dealing with new situations more comfortably. “Some parents believe that if they've spent an hour of "quality" time with their children, they've done enough.

This hour is usually focused on an enjoyable activity: watching TV going out to eat, going to the movies, etc” (Parenting Tips: Giving Your Children the Gift of Time). Many of the mothers are professionals and they get less time to spend with their children. Infants and children are often forced to spend the majority time in the daycare centers with nannies rather than mothers. The services of nannies can never be considered as the substitute for a mother’s services to a child. In order to compensate for the less time spent with the children; some working mothers have the habit of spending an hour with the children when they come back their home.

They are of the false belief that spending an hour as a friend with their children is enough for the proper development of their children. Children need the services of parents rather than friends. If parents give the services of peers, from where the children will get the services of parents? “Suffice it to say that guilty parenting overcompensates and causes children to view themselves as victims. This happens because children model our behavior and point their fingers at the parent who points the finger at himself” (Parenting Tips: Giving Your Children the Gift of Time).

Parents who failed to spend adequate time with their children often try to give more love and care to their children when they get opportunities to spend time with their children. This overcompensation usually do harm to the children rather than goods. Over activities of parents will increase the children’s desire for the presence of their parents further and further. Failure to spend increased time with parents will develop the feeling of victimization among children. According to Frank A.

Clark, “The most important thing that parents can teach their children is how to get along without them” (Parenting Quotes). Making the children self-sufficient to meet the realities in life is the core of good parenting. Parents are the first teachers in a child’s life. They consider their parents as the role models in their life. Whatever the things they learned from the parents or family will often reflect in their behavior in society. Society or schools can do little in the molding of children when we compare the roles parents can play in the development of children.

Alvin Price once said that “Parents need to fill a child's bucket of self-esteem so high that the rest of the world can't poke enough holes to drain it dry” (Parenting Quotes). The development of self-esteem among children depends on parenting. Poor parenting always affects the development of self-esteem whereas good parenting always helps the children in the development of self-esteem.

To conclude, parents have major roles to play in the life of their children. Good parenting can help a child to adapt to the challenging situations he may face in his future life whereas bad parenting will result in the underdevelopment of the child.