Set of Emotions by Eminem and Rihanna - Essay Example

Peer Reflection Response: Essay #3 The thesis of this essay “Set of Emotions” could have been worded differently so that the reader could understand it. First of all, the sentence is too long. A thesis needs to be as simple as possible because it sets up the rest of the essay. If a reader does not get the thesis, then the rest of the essay will not make sense to them. If this happens, then there really is no point in writing it. A better thesis would have been: “In the video ‘Love The Way You Lie’ by Eminem and Rihanna, the singers, actors, and producers all display anger through the tone of voice that is used and also the color and scenes.

” The supporting facts in this essay do back up the thesis because the author uses a direct quote from the song’s lyrics. More than this, the author expands on it by explaining in detail what some of the lyrics mean and how this relates back to the thesis. Even though this is a popular music video, there may be some people reading this paper who have never seen it before. Because of this, the author could have spent more time in the introduction explaining who the artists are and how the song relates to their lives.

The author does not use any counter argument, but this could be because there are very few counter arguments out there. Most people would agree that Eminem is a violent person, so it makes sense that he would rap a song that spoke of violent actions. Additionally, Rihanna has suffered from domestic violence before, so she understands the consequences of violence. The style used by this author is one that is easily understandable by most people. From reading the paper, it is easy to tell that the author’s native language is not English; but this does not detract from the way that they wrote the paper because they have largely followed a standard way of writing.

From reading the introduction of the paper, it is very easy to see that the tone of the author is one of authority; they could perhaps not offer their views so strongly and instead let the reader come to the conclusion themselves. The first sentence is a colloquial saying; this is done to soften the audience up. The grammar in this paper could have been improved because there are quite a few spelling and grammatical errors. I think that the author knows what they want to say but they don’t quite have the English ability to do it.

Perhaps they should consider getting their paper checked over by someone whose native language is English. If these mistakes are fixed up, then the paper would be a very good paper. The author largely appeals to emotion by using pathos. People are generally against violence so the author tries to take advantage of this point.