Letter to a Person About to be Married - Essay Example

Letter to a Person About to be Married Dear Lady, Just a few more weeks from now and you will be facing a new phase in your life. From being single, you will soon assume the role of a wife and later on a mother. By now, I am quite sure that you have heard a lot of different views about marriage. Let me share with you some of my thoughts about marriage hoping that it may be useful to you maybe now or in the future. Marriage is not only saying a simple “I do”. During the wedding ceremony, one cannot help but be idealistic about the relationship, something that will last forever.

But marriage is more than the wedding band, the wedding ring, the wedding cake and the beautiful white bridal gown. It is more than the romance that one experiences during the first few years of the marriage. It is a commitment, a decision to love someone for the rest of your life even when he fails to meet your expectations. Communication is key to making a marriage work and last. The success or failure of your marriage will be largely determined by your ability to communicate effectively with your spouse.

Marriage is nurtured by always keeping an open line of communication. There will definitely be arguments and misunderstandings but if you learn to communicate with your husband physically, emotionally and intellectually, your marriage will definitely last a lifetime. The dramaturgical theory of sociology comes into play in a marriage. Both you and your husband have a role to play in the marriage. Realize that in becoming married, your role shifts from being a girlfriend to being a wife.

In the same manner, his role changes from being merely a boyfriend to becoming a husband. There will be times when you both will not be satisfied with the “performance” of the other’s role but this should not discourage you. On the contrary, it should inspire both of you to strive better at “performing” your roles. Symbolic interactionism theory also applies in a marriage because of the concept of spousal roles and the expectations you both have on each other. Wives have stereotyped roles such as homemaker, one who will cook, do the grocery, clean the house and take care of the children.

Over the years though, this role has evolved. Society now realizes that a wife’s role is not limited inside the house. You too can get a job and be a professional. Today, household chores are not assigned solely to the woman of the house, rather there is now such a thing as shared responsibility. In the same manner, husbands are no longer the sole breadwinner of the family. Wives are now expected to help support the husband with the financial needs of the family. Furthermore, know that your husband’s role is no longer dictatorial.

You both have an equal role in the decision-making process in your family. Gone are the days when the husband dictates and the wife follows blindly. But remember to be always supportive of each other. The family is the major institution that is a result of a marriage. The family is the foundation of any society. Without a strong family system, the society becomes weak. It is therefore important that a marriage have a stable foundation for the family to function well in society. You may spend a lot of time at work, but always remember that your family should always be your priority.

When you finally decide to have children, bear in mind not only the impact of your relationship with your husband, but also the impact of your job, on the development of your children. You should consider yourself lucky for marrying a man who shares the same religious affiliation as yours. Religion is one of the institutions which play a major role in a marriage. You must remember that religion often shapes a person’s attitudes and beliefs. Marital union usually becomes stronger among two individuals who share the same religion.

Religion dictates the family systems such as the concept of gender roles and practices on procreation. Let me end this letter by emphasizing to you that love and romance may fade away. But what will hold you together is that firm DECISION TO LOVE each other no matter what. There are no secrets or short-cuts to a happy and lasting marriage; you will both have to work at it. The task ahead is not easy but your determination to make the marriage work will definitely get you through any impediments and hurdles which you may encounter as you journey your life together.

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