Friends in Cyberspace - Essay Example

Your Full Your April 17, Friends in Cyberspace Humans are social animals, which entails that we thrive in social groups rather than on our own. Apart from the family that we are born into, we develop a kinship sort of bond with those who we call our friends. Traditionally, people met each other at our work, school or some social gathering and then slowly, and over a period of extended repeated contact, became friends. However, with the advent of social media, like Orkut and MySpace in the past, and Facebook and Twitter currently (to name just a few), this dynamic has changed. One only has to log into one’s account of any of these social media to meet people and interact with them. It is only natural that some of these interactions lead to friendships that can last for a lifetime. Despite the bad rap that online friendships get, social networks are very effective in finding and maintaining close friendship ties and bonds. Because of social media, it is easy to sift out people who share our values and interests from the rest, and that helps us in finding friends who share similar interests with us. As most social media activity occurs publicly, it is easy to gauge what the values and preferences of the other people are. Whenever someone posts a comment on a given topic online, the readers can very easily judge what position the person is taking on that issue, which , in turn, helps the other people online decide whether they want further interactions with the same person or not. These interactions can also include private messages instead of public ones alone. For example, if one is a member of a forum that deals with feminist issues, it is very easy to form an opinion about the views of another member on the topics by their comments. In such instances, likeminded people do tend to get closer to one another, and even become friends down the line. Social media are a great boon to the shy and the socially awkward people, as they can socialize much more online and, thus, make friends. Outside of cyberspace, social situations demand certain etiquettes; these include small talk as well as subtle verbal and non verbal cues. Quite a considerable number of people are not only bad at small talk, but can also never understand the nuances involved in nonverbal cues. Such people often find themselves at a huge disadvantage when it comes to making friends through regular socializing. This is where social media help as well. Most cyber interactions do not require any small talk; one comes straight to the point. Moreover, you can jump straight into the conversations that interest you and nobody really requires elaborate introductions beforehand. For instance, at a SubReddit dedicated to movies, everyone is free to jump in and give their input about a certain topic without introductions. Critics say that as there can be no intimacy on cyberspace, you cannot be truly involved in someone’s life, the way friends are, only by knowing them online. What is more, they say that this offhand “knowledge of existence,” so to say, of another does not mean that they get the social and emotional support that they need and get outside cyberspace. While that might be true for certain acquaintances that you know online, or people you just randomly come across, it cannot hold true for people you consider your “online” friends. The friends that you make in cyberspace are just as caring and as supportive as any “real life” friends can be. Often times, they are the only supportive group that a lonely, socially awkward, teen (or even adult) can find in their lives; even more supportive than one’s family. What is more, this “perfunctory connection” is true of acquaintances one knows as well. You can meet people in real life at all the parties that you go to, yet have no idea what is going on in their lives, and if they need emotional support. So, it is not a defect of social media, but rather that is just how social interactions work. The friendships formed on social media are not restricted by any geographical or social constraints. A girl from Middle East, which is a very conservative culture, can be friends with a boy from the UK, without any social ramifications. Online friendships are also not hampered by time constraints as you can leave a message when you have time to a friend, who can then read it when s/he is free. What is more, there are many applications like Google Hangout and Skype, which let you video chat with your friends irrespective of where in the world you are located, helping you stay connected and in touch. Just like “in real life” people can take time out from their busy schedules to be with their friends and see them and their surroundings physically. This helps form a personal connection with people. There are many friends who meet over at the weekend through some online social application in order to have a chat or just to sit and socialize. Critics also say that the quality of people online is abysmal and that social media, mostly, involve you in just a race to see how many “friends” you have and not what kind of friends you have. Even though it might be true that there are many bad people online, be they bullies or trolls for instance, however, there are very nice, caring and genuinely warm people online as well. Just like in real life where you get to decide who you want to be friends with out of a group of people, online friendships are a matter of picking out your preferred people from a group as well. Just like in real life, where you “know” a lot of people but only want to be friends with a select few. Online friendships are not about how many people you know, but are about what sort of person the other person is and whether you get along with them. In conclusion, though there are many detractors of online friendships, it is a fact that today a lot of people, socially awkward or not, find true friendships online through social media. These friendships are not limited by any geographical constraints and are just as rich and fulfilling as the friendships formed outside of cyberspace. Yes, there are a few constraints that make it harder to maintain friendships, however, they are not limited to the cyber world only and are just as present in the world around us as well. Just like the “real” world, the cyber world also consists of people who are mere acquaintances to us, even if we interact with them every day, and people who are close friends to us and who know everything about us and who are there to support us through thick and thin. In short, it is not only possible to make “actual” friends on cyberspace, but, for certain people, cyberspace is the only place where they can meet their friends. Works Cited Baer, Jay. "Social Media, Pretend Friends, and the Lie of False Intimacy."Convince and Convert Social Media Strategy and Content Marketing Strategy. Convince and Convert, n.d. Web. 16 Apr. 2014. Pickard, Anna. "Virtual People, Real Friends." Theguardian.com. Guardian News and Media, 2 Jan. 2009. Web. 17 Apr. 2014. Rosen, Rebecca J. "Facebook Friends, and Why We Should Lose the Scare Quotes." The Atlantic. Atlantic Media Company, 10 Jan. 2013. Web. 17 Apr. 2014. Terri, Thornton. "How Social Media ‘Friends’ Translate Into Real-Life Friendships." Mediashift. PBS, 13 July 2013. Web. 16 Apr. 2014. Read More