The Poblem of People Having only Online Friends - Essay Example

Introduction We are living in the age of computer technology. Most everything in our life now is affected, embellished, or is made easier by computer technology. And this computer technology is gaining more improvements and advancements every year. Just as one development is becoming introduced into the market, another improvement is being planned. With the invention of the internet and the World Wide Web, telecommunications have now become easier, faster, and cheaper. What used to be the other side of the world, is now just a chat or an internet connection away. Social networking sites have also made it easier for other people – from the most sociable to the most reclusive – to interact and to find friends online. However, in some instances, other people have come to rely on this medium, to the point of it becoming a disorder or an unhealthy problem. This paper shall discuss the problem of people having only online friends. It shall specifically discuss internet abuse, otherwise known as compulsive or pathologic internet use in relation to social anxiety disorders. This paper shall also discuss tentative solutions to this problem. Discussion: Internet Abuse Social anxiety disorders usually manifests as a persistent fear of social performance situations where a person is exposed to unfamiliar people. The individual sometimes fears that he might act in an embarrassing way and be humiliated in the process. In these instances, their exposure to social situations usually triggers their anxiety. As a result, such anxiety often manifests in their panic, crying, freezing or shrinking from social situations (Chandler, n.d). The person afflicted with this disease is most often aware that his fears are exaggerated; however, he cannot control or manage such fears. As a result, these people avoid these social situations and veer away from situations which may cause them embarrassment. Their attempt at avoiding these embarrassing social situations often interferes with their lives and their normal academic, social, or professional activities (Chandler, n.d). The internet is often used by these individuals in order to acquire social interactions. They often find the internet a more comfortable place to meet and interact with other people. They find it a more comfortable setting because their fears in being embarrassed or humiliated do not exist in this setting. However, as a result, their moments of interaction become limited to the internet or online setting. Moreover, they often end up having a limited number of friends beyond the internet or online medium. In some instances, this leads to another problem – internet abuse or compulsive internet use. A person with a social anxiety disorder who also becomes a compulsive internet user often finds more satisfying relationships and interactions online as compared to personal social interactions (Joinson, p. 339). In adolescents, Gross, et.al., (2002, p. 87) describes it best when he discusses that “in the case of chronic or even temporarily feelings of social discomfort or detachment…adolescents may use the internet to avoid being alone, and, in doing so, turn to people disconnected from their daily life”. The internet then becomes a form of escapism for them. In the process, they end up having only online friends (Joinson, p. 341). This makes their social problems and social fears even worse. Since they know that through the internet they can still have social interactions with other people sans personal interaction, the more that they use and abuse the internet. Through a certain period of time and through several interactions, these shy and socially inept individuals end up preferring the anonymous and impersonal social connections and interactions they find online. And a cycle is often created as the person continues to shy away from social interactions and delves deeper into his internet and online ‘relationships’. Through his internet abuse, he is actually not doing himself any favors as far as his social anxiety problem is concerned. In the process, he has actually created another psychological problem over and above his existing disorder. Tentative solutions A tentative solution to this problem is to break the cycle of addiction (Dossey, et.al., p. 785). People described above have a problem with their social interactions, made worse by the fact that they have other ways to ‘interact’ with other people which keeps them from facing their actual problem. In any other form of addiction (alcohol, smoking, sex, etc), interventions which were primarily applied involved the cutting off of the cycle. Once the cycle is stopped, the actual problem can now be faced by the patient or by the internet addict. Internet abuse must be treated like any other form of addiction. There is, therefore, a need to understand the addiction. Since the internet addiction, in this case, stems from a social anxiety disorder, there is a need to address the social anxiety problem first before addressing the problem of compulsive internet use. There are various ways to address social anxiety disorders. Cognitive behavioral therapy is one of the most common and popular remedies being used for social anxiety disorders. This therapy helps a person change the thoughts that cause him fear. The therapist will assist the person to change or adjust his mindset and his thoughts and make them more positive (Leahy & Holland, p. 165). The therapist can also help the patient find ways to relax and to deal with social situations in order to avoid anxiety and panic attacks. Medications can also be recommended by psychotherapists in order to help the patient control the onset of anxiety in social situations. Through these medications, the patient can function better in social interactions and eventually to reduce his internet use and abuse. Some therapists recommend that people who suffer from social anxiety disorders can observe other people. Through the process of observation they can sometimes notice that not many people are actually looking at them (Leahy & Holland, p. 166). This will help them cope with stressful social gatherings and interactions without having such interactions be reduced to fearful experiences. Patients are also encouraged to test predictions in order to deal with their social phobias. This solution works by asking patients to write down what they think might happen and how they would react if such things happen, and then compare these reactions with other people (Leahy & Holland, p. 166). Often, they come to discover that they have exaggerated reactions to situations. Another possible intervention would be to ask the patient to judge another person who may encounter the same social situations. “Many patients judge others far less harshly than they expect to be judged themselves” (Leahy & Holland, p. 166). The therapist and the patient can then explore or evaluate this discrepancy in order to bring clarity to the patient’s mindset. Social skills training is also considered a possible solution to social anxiety disorders. The process of this training is simple enough with patient introductions, choosing topics of conversation, active listening, empathy, social disclosure, and similar activities (Leahy & Holland, p. 153). Through this training, the patient can learn how to function in social situations and to be comfortable during said interactions. After dealing with the social anxiety problem, the process of internet abuse can now slowly be reduced. The patient’s need to be online all the time will be minimized. His friendship networks would also expand to include more personal interactions with other people. Slowly, but surely, the patient can now manage to interact with other people personally, and not through the internet or online medium only. And as his world now expands to include the world beyond his computer, so can his social life. Works Cited Chandler, J. (n.d) Social Anxiety Disorder in Children and Adolescents, Kwiklink Internet Services, viewed 27 September 2009 from http://www.klis.com/chandler/pamphlet/socphob/socphobpamphlet.htm Dossey, B., Keegan, L., Guzzetta, C., 2005, Holistic nursing: a handbook for practice, Massachusetts: Jones & Bartlett Gross, E., Juvonen, J., & Gable, S., 2002, Internet Use and well being in adolescence Journal of Social Issues, Volume, 58, no. 1, pp. 75-90. Joinson, A., McKenna, K., & Postmes, T., 2007, The Oxford handbook of Internet psychology, New York: Oxford University Press Leahy, R. & Holland, S., 2000, Treatment plans and interventions for depression and anxiety disorders, New York: Guilford Press Read More