Divorce from Different Perspectives - Essay Example

Divorce from Different Perspectives Introduction Over the past half century, tremendous changes have been witnessed in family patterns in Western societies. This has elicited concern from various persons and the church. One of the most prominent changes is the increased incidences of divorce among married persons. The rise of this phenomenon has prompted a wide range of responses from various Christian quarters. The view on the subject of divorce however varies among different Christian faiths as well as among liberals. This paper will focus on the views held by the Catholic Church, the evangelical community and liberal persons on the subject of divorce. So as to provide a concrete report on the subject, a critical examination of the individual view of the institution of marriage this will conduct. This will provide a platform for the analysis of the topic of divorce by first understanding their rationale on the subject. Some of the major contributors of the increased divorce cases will be identified and will finally conclude by establishing some of the ways the different parties propose for tackling this problem. According to (Browning 2001, p4), the major causes of the change in family patterns such as increased divorce rates are modernization and globalization. This further raises a vital question such as should the changes be embraced and seen as the norm? The other important question that arises is what are the changes indicative of dynamism in family life or are they part of a wider problem or crisis? (Browning 2001 p247) notes that since the 1980’s there has been a significant change in the worldwide perception of family changes such as divorce. Studies conducted by sociologists, psychologists and economists point to these changes as to having detrimental effects on most people. Divorce has been found to bring about immense emotional, social and financial consequences (Glenn 1997). Changes in the family patterns caused by practices such as divorce have been linked to declining wellbeing of children who are involved in the process. Studies into the effects of divorce have pointed out that children from families where divorce has happened have a high rate of delinquency. They were also found to exhibit low self-confidence and faced a higher risk of leading unhappy marriages in the future. It is critical to understand that each branch of Christianity views divorce in its different way. Since its commencement over two thousand years ago, the Catholic Church has maintained its stand on the indissolubility of marriage. The church holds a conservative view on dissolution of a marriage. According to the Catholic Church teachings, marriage is a covenant not only between two consenting adults but also between the parties and God. According to the Catholic Church, there are various components that make up a marriage. Marriage therefore goes beyond a legal ceremony with candles and priests and a signed document. The two parties to the union are deemed to be physically and mentally capable of getting to a union that should span for a lifetime. This, therefore, implies that the partners should give themselves for each other with outmost commitment and faithfulness till death. This forms the marital consent aspect of marriage. The two parties must present valid reasons of their intentions for getting married. This should be including intention of fidelity and looking out for mutual good of each other. Marriage is a covenant between a man and a woman for a partnership lasting for life. All this is based on teachings of St. Paul in Eph. five where marriage is taken to be a sacrament. For this sacrament to be enforced, one has to be married in the presence of a catholic priest or deacon within the Catholic Church. This forms the Canonical Form of marriage. It exclusively meant for catholic spouses. When a couple gets married following all the proper Canonical Form and after provision of the necessary intentions, the marriage vows that are passed are recognized by the church even if the government dissolves the marriage through the process of divorce. The church draws its stand from teachings of Jesus in the New testament, who emphasized that no one should separate what God has joined (Mt. 19:5). However, this does not mean that one party to the union should suffer in silence. Although Catholic has been steady in their stand against divorce, it has its mechanism of dealing with the issue. Although the Catholic Church does not recognize divorce, it grants annulments (Smith 2010). The church recognizes the fact that there are situations that separation of a couple is inevitable. It also proposes that those who go through the process of divorce should deny themselves the partaking of Eucharist. This provision however has raised questions about its significance as most persons who go through with the divorce still take the sacrament. The reason behind this is because their conscience allows them to do so. In the Catholic Church, it is possible for the second marriage. This is only possible when a catholic receives a Declaration of Nullity, which is based on Lack of Canonical form. There are situations when marital consent is considered. The process is referred to as Formal Case. After it is proved that the differences are irreconcilable, a decree of Invalidity is issued. This decree seeks to confirm that there lacked an enduring union since the beginning of the union. This process, however, should not be taken as the Catholic Church's way of conducting divorce. The church is of the view no one has the power to separate people who have been united by God (Woodrow 2002). The decree also does not seek to imply of the non-existence of the marriage rather it shows that the marriage lacked the character of the sacrament. The Catholic Church does not bar divorced persons from participating in the church. They are also free to receive sacraments. The problem arises when one divorces and remarries without receiving a Decree of Invalidity and their former spouse is still alive. Such persons are barred from taking the communion. The Catholic Church encourages people to seek the Decree of Invalidity when undergoing the process of divorce. This is because the process is seen as a source of strength and helps one during that difficult period by providing personal and emotional growth. This would also ensure one increases their participation in the church. The divorce rate among evangelicals is also on the rise. There are two divisions in the evangelical movement. There are those who have adopted more flexible and progressive measures of dealing with the changing family formations. This class of evangelicals has made huge strides towards adoption of more liberal views while approaching the issue of divorce. The other group consists of the conservative evangelicals. This group remains uneasy about the subject of divorce. Conservative evangelicals maintain that the divorce is not a suitable solution to marital problems. Evangelical churches however are moving towards more flexible thinking when looking for solutions to emerging issues. This is evidenced by some churches forming ministries for newly divorced persons. Some of the clergy of globally known churches have been on record publicly announcing their intentions to have divorce (Smith 2010). The evangelical stand on marriage is founded on two premises. These premises revolve around the issue of the purpose of marriage. The primary purpose of marriage was identified as for mutual help and guidance which is based on (Eph 5:23-25). The second one is both spiritual and physical fulfillment as well as the prevention of immorality which is identified in (1 Chr 7:1-7). According to (Köstenberger 2004), having children is also an important element among the reasons for marriage. This, on the other hand, this view presents an ethical challenge. Does it mean that childless marriages are inferior to those where children are? While considering the issue of childlessness, it, therefore, means that procreation is of secondary importance. Marriage is considered to be more than sexuality and extends deeper due to the spiritual relationship between a man, woman, and Christ. It runs more than a legally binding contract. Due to this, (Köstenberger 2004) concludes by stating that marriage is a sacred bond whose features include permanence, intimacy, and mutuality. Evangelical churches are not entirely against the whole idea of divorce. The idea of divorce is acceptable within certain limits. Divorce is viewed as acceptable where the actions of one part to the marriage inhibits and suppresses the other’s commitment to God. Although this is the case, some of the elements such as adultery should not always lead to divorce. Evangelical churches advocate people adopting and embracing forgiveness and reconciliation as the first options to solutions to marital problems. The churches accept and advocate for divorced persons to remarry. This however should be done after repenting and forgiving. When people ignore this aspect of mental and spiritual healing and go ahead and remarry, they will be going against the scriptures that widely promote forgiveness and reconciliation. Unethical conduct of one of the parties to the marriage union such as drug addictions, sexual abuse and violence and continued humiliation which would derail the other person’s relationship with God that is sufficient grounds for divorce. According to (Douma 1997), divorce is a regrettable decision that should only be considered after all other options have been exhausted. According to (Smith 2010), increased divorce rates among evangelical Christians is a result of their failure to adopt strict laws regarding the subject. Smith argues that most evangelical Christians shifted their opinion on divorce after the phenomenon started becoming common. Initially, evangelical Christians viewed marriage and divorce in a large cultural extent and was seen as matters of public interest. This view then gradually shifted, and marriage and divorce were seen as private matters. This ensured the separation of marriage matters from religious matters and followers of evangelical churches were more open to the idea of divorce. Evangelical Christians are concerned about the family unit (Lanny 1991). For this reason, actions that are aimed at strengthening the family unit are always advocated. This by extension means that there exist instances where divorce is the most appropriate course of action. People who undergo the divorce process should receive marriage counseling so as to ensure the problems that occurred in the troubled marriage do not get carried over to the next marriage. The rationale behind divorce as a last resort is that the divorce is better than staying in a loveless relationship. This is because marriage is supposed to epitomize love as the Bible advocates for husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church (Ewald 1991). Remarrying is seen as to provide a second chance for people to correct their mistakes with other partners. There is another approach to adoption of divorce as a way out to persistent marital problems comes from one's perception of the scriptures. Some evangelical Christians believe that God is all knowing and would, therefore, understand the reasons behind one's decision to get divorced. According to the Catholic Church, the entire institution of marriage is divine based and it therefore divorce goes against the will of God. This is because divorce goes against the promise of lifelong commitment to each other. This in extension points to breaking of a vow. It is also important to understand the position held by other persons who consider themselves liberal. According to (Lanny 1991), there was the need for the church to abandon canon law on marriage as marriage was no longer considered a church sacrament in the Church of England. He went ahead to push for the grounds for divorce be expanded to include incompatibility. Divorce cases were also to be reclassified from public jurisdiction to either civil or private jurisdiction. In spite of such progressive proposals, Milton argued that men had a natural right to control a marriage since women are primarily there in a marriage so as to prevent loneliness in men. If a woman did not ensure this, the man had a right to take another woman even without the consent of the first woman. Due to this, no law or rule should hinder men from exercising their natural, civil duty. Atheists are of the opinion that the marriage is only by law with no eternal vows attached (Glenn 1997). This, therefore, proves a leeway where persons can end the union as they wish. For an atheist, the fact that the law permits divorce is reason enough for people consider it in troubled marriages. Interestingly, atheists who hold liberal views towards life concur with evangelical Christians that there is no need for persons to stay in miserable marriages. The grounds for divorce among most liberals is however quite different with the other two groups. Liberals are more likely to consider divorcing as opposed to Catholics and Evangelical Christians. The effects of divorce are numerous (Glenn 1997). Studies have shown that alcoholism is more prevalent among divorced persons than those have not. Research has also shown that those who have had multiple divorces are more likely to engage in alcoholism. The rate of suicide is higher among divorced persons than those in life long marriages. Depression and psychiatric disorders have also been found to be higher among divorced persons. The effects of divorce extend to the children of the affected families. There exists statistical data that shows devastating effects of divorce on children. These effects result from the emotional trauma that the children undergo through as well as the lack of adequate attention that children require from their parents. Children from broken homes are more prone to producing children out of wedlock. The lack of role models from the homes might be a factor that researchers cite as to being behind the fact that children from broken homes have a harder time finding and maintaining stable employment (Woodrow 2002). Perhaps this is the reason conservative evangelical Christians and catholic faithful's are reluctant to embracing divorce. These churches advocate for the Christian parents to go out of their way to ensure a marriage stays intact and set good examples to their children by teaching their children the scripture’s view on marriage. This teaching should be done by both the mother and a father. The parents should teach their children attributes that will ensure they grow up to make informed personal decisions. This ensures they grow up to be responsible persons. Children, on the other hand, are tasked to being obedient to their parents. This specific obligation has no end and should continue even in the children’s adulthood. There is the need for Christians to go back to the drawing board ad reassess what is causing the increased rates of divorce among them. Christians understanding do this that a Christian's view of family and marriage life should only be guided by what is written down in the scriptures. This view is however challenged by the modern culture that we live in today. Over time, there has been a tendency for Christians to accept and adopt modern customs that involve their morality. According to (Gill 1997 p86), this tendency has been identified in the Church of England through embracing of less than ideal secular practices. Practices such as faithful cohabitation and faithful homosexual relationships being accepted by the church is a problem as some of these secular practices compromise on the authority of God over marriage. Widespread acceptance of these practices would lead to the creation of situation-oriented ethics that would remove the role of the church as being then moral custodians. The church, therefore, should draw clear lines on how to deal with various issues in the current society. Issues such as same-sex relationships, abortion, and usage of contraceptives, polygamy and divorce should be addressed by the church adequately. The church should not seem to lie in the middle ground in controversial matters. In the same light, Christians should strive to live according to the teachings in the scriptures. One of the major causes in the shift in the line of thinking regarding divorce and remarriage is the changing attitude on the subjects. The number of persons who have lost faith in the institution of marriage is on the rise. People are opting cohabiting where a couple lives together and even gets children together. This could be partly due to the church’s reduced impact as the moral custodian. Perhaps people’s idea of the purpose of marriage has changed from what those who lived in the days of yore believed in. There are those who are opting for marriage as a tool for economic survival. Marriage is slowly losing its meaning in the eyes of many people with the popular believe that two people who sincerely and honesty love each other should not necessarily get married in the church (Glenn 1997). The common believe that marriage is a religious institution that has no place in the modern societies. Such rationale is responsible for increased liberalism even in Christianity where more flexible stances are being taken. According to (Glenn 1997), the general view that’s growing gradually is that there is no need to stay in unfulfilling marriages. This is because people are prone to change and even though the marriage was initially smooth, things might turn for the worst over time. When this happens and efforts to maintain the marriage fail, divorce is a favorable option. Such experiences are becoming a reality in our society and therefore it is wise for married couples consider divorce when everything else fails. The topic of remarriage is deeply intertwined with that of divorce. The Catholic Church is comfortable for people who have gotten a Decree of Invalidity to remarry. According to the church, there is no problem for one to remarry after the death of their spouse. This is because the oath of marriage is a vow that should be binding until death does them apart. Evangelical Christians are also advised to remarry after divorce. Liberal persons have the most freedom in this matter as they can marry and divorce as many times as they deem fit. Several consecutive failed marriages by one person, on the other hand, should serve as an eye-opener on their failings on their part. According to (Glenn 1997) , remarriage is similar to the first marriage in terms of suitability as long as it respects the institution of marriage as well as it does not go against the teachings of the holy scriptures. Conclusion The ever increasing rising rates of divorce rates is a worrying trend. It is an issue that calls for increased efforts from individual persons so as to uphold this important institution. Divorce cases cut across Catholics, evangelical Christians and eve the non-religious people. This might be a consequence of changing ideals on the institution of marriage. Religious leaders should take a more active role in the teaching of topics that focus on family values and moral value. This could see a significant decrease in the occurrence of this phenomenon whose effects reach out to children and derail their emotional and mental health. According to (Glenn 1997), first time, monogamous and lifelong marriages are directly linked to improved mental health of adults and the children. From the discussion above, one of the issues that arise predominantly is that there exist several similarities between the positions held by various Christian groups. The major differences result from the degree to which an individual religious group holds towards a specific view. Never the less, actions people should consider the different implications of their actions. This will ensure that people’s approach towards issues such as divorce is based on understanding of the full magnitude their actions might lead to. References List Browning, D 2001. The world situation of families: Marriage reformation as a cultural Work. Edinburgh: T & T Clark Browning, D 2001. World family trends, in Gill, R (ed), The Cambridge Companion to Christian Ethics, 243-260. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press. Douma, J 1996. The Ten Commandments: Manual for the Christian Life. Phillipsburg, NJ: P & R Publishing. Ewald, G. R 1991. Jesus and Divorce, a Biblical Guide for Ministry to Divorced Persons. Scottdale, PA: Herald Press Köstenberger, A J 2004. God, marriage, and family: Rebuilding the Biblical foundation. Wheaton, IL: Crossway. Laney, J. C. 1981. The Divorce Myth. A Biblical Examination of Divorce and Remarriage. Minneapolis, Minn.: Bethany House Publishers Smith, M. A. 2010. “Religion, Divorce, and the Missing Culture War in America,” Political Science Quarterly, 125:1 Stanton, Glenn T. 1997. Why Marriage Matters: Reasons to Believe in Marriage in Post-Modern Society. Colorado Springs, CO: Pinon Press. Stein, Robert H. 1992 “Divorce” article in Dictionary of Jesus and the Gospels. Editor Joel B. Green. Downers Grove, IL: Intervarsity Press, p. 192-199. Woodrow, R. 2002. Divorce and Remarriage: What Does the Bible Say? 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