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This is a situation where there is a misunderstanding between siblings in a family. The results are always dangerous and detrimental to the welfare of the family. Dr. Goldenthal expounds the issues…
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Download file to see previous pages First, the act of having favorites among siblings is a major cause of sibling rivalry. This is a situation where parents treat the children differently. As such, a child, or children may feel neglected in favor of brothers or sisters. This creates a gap between them in their relationship. The children cannot interact or coexist peacefully. Hostilities are imminent. Unequal treatment may be in form of parents rewarding some children and not appreciating the efforts of the others. Consequently, ignoring the contribution of some siblings to the family is also a dangerous factor that leads to rivalry. Siblings assume that they do not belong to the same family.
Another basis is the treatment accorded to a newborn in the family. According to Goldenthal, children feel neglected when parents shift their care and attention to nursing a newborn (12). More often, the arrival of newborn has been associated with shifts in attention from the older children to the infant. As such, the older children may feel disappointed and develop a cold attitude towards the newborn. The rivalry may continue as far as the parents treat the children differently.
When parents send a child or children to live with relatives while other children are left is seen as discrimination. Children who are left behind are seen to derive more favor and affection from the parents. On the other hand, children who are sent away feel like they do not belong. Thus, the rivalry between the children who ‘do not belong’ and those who ‘belong’ is unavoidable (10).
As stated earlier, sibling rivalry is detrimental to family welfare and thus should be avoided at all. As such, parents should always look out for signs of alienation in the family. The major actions that can mitigate sibling rivalry are; detect the presence of bullying in the family, avoid favoritism, talk to children later, parents should never get into children fights, ask straight questions.
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