Discussion of Benefits and Detriments of Love - Coursework Example

Topic: Critical discussions of Benefits and Detriments of being blinded by Love Name: Student Number: Institution: Tutor’s Name: Date of Submission: 1. Introduction to the topic Love is a condition where a person has a liking for another person. The level of liking is dependent on the gains the person needs to derive from the other person. However, during love process, there is the possibility of either benefiting from the act or getting detrimental results from the act (Rauer and Volling, 2007). Love is mainly obtained from the nearest people who live close to a person such as members of the family and close friends. However, the person who loves another person or the person who expects love from another person may have certain motives that prevent the attainment of the intended love. This can result into reactions from another person that affects the relationship with the other person (Niedenthal and Brauer, 2012). It also results into a number of other reactions that include seeking other strategies for getting the needed love. This paper provides a discussion of benefits that can be derived from being blinded by love as well as detrimental impacts that can result from being blinded by love. It also provides the logic of loving someone because of the satisfaction that a person can get from turning a blind eye to the other person. 2. Critical discussion of why being blinded by love can be beneficial for relationship satisfaction Being blinded by love can be beneficial to an individual due to a number of reasons why the individual is engaging in love with another person. For instance, the person may be seeking to benefit from the other person’s superiority, achievement or possession and desires to possess it or wished that the other person does not have it (Gottman and Levenson, 2002). For instance, a woman who earns less salary than her husband may observe that her friend has been taken to a wonderful holiday by her husband. She may need to go to a similar place but does not have the means to do so. Thus, she may ask her husband to take her to a similar place due to his financial capability more than the woman. This can result into the woman getting blinded into loving the man for the purpose of getting to the same holiday that her friend was taken by her husband. Thus, the act of being blinded by love for the man is beneficial because he manages to make her for a holiday she desired. A person may also love another person because of a feeling of inferiority in certain situations, guilt, denial and being aware of an inappropriate bill. Thus he may love another person who creates superiority in him and contributes to elimination of the feeling of guilt, resentment or ill will (Niedenthal and Brauer, 2012). Despite the possibility of opposition from the other person, the individual who wants these needs to be fulfilled will not be concerned with the harm and will be more focused on satisfying the needs of becoming superior in a similar manner as the other person. People may also be blinded by love because there can be certain common things between them that result into inter-chain connections. This results into closeness of people’s relationships. When different people interconnect frequently and their interconnection is strong and diverse, the relationship becomes close. When the relationships are close, they become meshed and there are chances that one partner may fail to do the expected thing. When one of the partners violates the expectations of another person, the violation can be appraised as a good or bad and the impact is that there will be a scene of emotions (Gottman and Levenson, 2002). Partners who are in emotionally tranquil relationships may not be aware of the level of dependence on emotional investments. This may only be evident during a sudden interruption such as sudden death that results into explosion of the meshed interconnections. The interruption becomes intense and prolonged among the affected partners. Thus, when a person finds that another person is willing and capable of helping in fulfillment of the cherished hopes and intentions, new opportunities of meshing are created. This can be done by doing interesting things together, making plans together that need to be accomplished by the other individual. There are certain people who have the ability to respond to others’ needs and are vigilant for signs of rejection (Goetz, Keltner and Simon-Thomas, 2010). Thus, when they discover that a person has the ability to provide them with these needs, they tend to become friends with the person that results into love despite the possibility of harm that can result from the relationship. 3. Critical discussion of why being blinded by love can be detrimental to relationship satisfaction Most significant negative impact of being blinded by love is that the person who loves another person may be betrayed in a number of ways. In other cases, the person who loves may also betray the person who is loved. For instance, in a family where there are a number of siblings under the care of both parents, there is the possibility of parents showing preference for a particular child and do not give other children the attention they give to the other children (Eisenberg, Liew and Pidada, 2001). On the other hand, these children may be loyal to them and want to be associated with their parents. However, the parents may not be concerned with their upbringing and may not give them the right parental care and guide needed to make them responsible citizens. Thus they may grow to become less obedient and undisciplined but unaware of the conditions happening to them. Consequently, they may involve themselves in activities that are against the morals of life and may be apprehended by authorities (Clark, Fitness and Brissette, 2001). This would lead to their detrimental as a result of betrayal from their parents. Another case where being blinded by love may be detrimental is the case where a man loves a woman and wants her to dedicate her time to nurture their relationship. He would expect the woman to be available when he needs her, present herself well as only having him as the partner and cooperate with him in solving issues that surround them. When a man feels that a particular woman possesses these qualities, he may be blinded to fall in love with her hoping that he will benefit from her care, cooperation in solving issues in their relationship and also remain faithful to her (Clark and Finkel, 2005). On the other hand, both the spouses may betray the relationship and it can be detrimental in the end. This may happen in a case where the woman may be having affairs or relationship with other men apart from the man who hopes that she is faithful to him. The detrimental impacts may even be visible without the man discovering that the woman is unfaithful to hm. For instance, she may be unwilling to cooperate in solving issues that surround them and also unavailable to the man at the time of need for company (Berscheid and Ammazzalorso, 2001). This may result into unpleasant situation for one partner due to his inability to get the expectations he required. In the end, the relationship can have wrangles and the partners are most likely to break up. In another case, the unfaithful partner may get into sexual contact with other people and may get sexually transmitted diseases. When they have sexual contact with her faithful partner, he may get the infections and this may be detrimental to his health. 4. The extent to which love depends on what the individual turns a blind eye to There are situations where it may be argued that a person needs to turn a blind eye to love by ignoring the negative impacts that would arise from the situation and focusing on the benefits that would be derived from being in love (Barry and Kochanska, 2010). For instance, when a person has a desire to get a partner for the purpose of company, it may be advisable to focus on the benefits derived from that company rather than going into details such as inquiring private life of the other individual. However, it is also advisable that such a partner should take caution to ensure the negative impacts from betrayal of the other partner does not result into negative impacts to him or her. Another factor that may affect relationships includes emotions. One of the partners may be very emotional when things do not happen according to their expectations (Algoe, Haidt and Gable, 2008). On the other hand, the emotional partner can be beneficial in provision of other benefits such as good company, advise and participation in coming up with solutions in the relationships. However, a logical person who wants to maintain love and derive the benefits of the relationship should only focus on the benefits and create means of avoiding any negative impacts such as fights and quarrels with the other partner. Generally, this paper shows that to love someone requires the understanding of the limitations of falling in love with someone and preparation to accept the impacts of the limitations. This ensures love is nurtured in spite of the problems encountered among partners involved in love. 5. References Algoe, S. B., Haidt, J., & Gable, S. L. 2008. Beyond reciprocity: Gratitude and relationships in everyday life. Emotion, 8, 425–29. Aron, A., Norman, C., Aron, E., McKenna, C., & Heyman R. 2000. Couples’ shared participation in novel and arousing activities and experienced relationship quality. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 78, 273–84. Barry, R. A., & Kochanska, G. 2010. A longitudinal investigation of the affective environment in families with young children: From infancy to early school age. Emotion, 10, 237–49. Berscheid, E. & Ammazzalorso, H. 2001. Emotional experience in close relationships. In G. J. O. Fletcher & M. S. Clark (Eds.), Blackwell handbook of social psychology: Interpersonal processes (pp. 308–30). Malden, MA: Blackwell. Clark, M. S., & Finkel, E. J. 2005. Willingness to express emotion: The impact of relationship type, communal orientation, and their interaction. Personal Relationships, 12, 169–80. Clark, M. S., Fitness, J., & Brissette, I. 2001. Understanding people’s perceptions of relationshipsis crucial to understanding their emotional lives. In G. J. O. Fletcher & M. S. Clark (Eds.), Blackwell handbook of social psychology: Interpersonal processes (pp. 253–78). Malden, MA: Blackwell. Eisenberg, N., Liew, J., & Pidada, S. 2001. The relations of parental emotional expressivity with quality of Indonesian children’s social functioning. Emotion, 1, 116–36. Gable, S. L., Reis, H. T., Impett, E. A., & Asher, E. R. 2004.What do you do when things go right? The intrapersonal and interpersonal benefits of sharing positive events. Journal of Personality & Social Psychology, 87, 228–45. Goetz, J. L., Keltner, D., & Simon-Thomas, E. 2010. Compassion: An evolutionary analysis and empirical review. Psychological Bulletin, 136, 351–74. Gottman, J. M., & Levenson, R. W. 2002. A two-factor model for predicting when a couple will divorce: Exploratory analyses using 14-year longitudinal data. Family Process, 41, 83–110. Niedenthal, P. M., & Brauer, M. 2012. Social functionality of human emotion. Annual Review of Psychology, 63, 259–85. Rasbash, J., Jenkins, J., O’Connor, T. G., Tackett, J., & Reiss, D. 2011. A social relations model of observed family negativity and positivity using a genetically informative sample. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 100, 474–91. Rauer, A. J., & Volling, B. L. 2007. Differential parenting and sibling jealousy: Developmental correlates of self-esteem, attachment, and jealousy in young adults’ romantic relationships. Personal Relationships, 14, 495–511. Read More

People may also be blinded by love because there can be certain common things between them that result into inter-chain connections. This results into closeness of people’s relationships. When different people interconnect frequently and their interconnection is strong and diverse, the relationship becomes close. When the relationships are close, they become meshed and there are chances that one partner may fail to do the expected thing. When one of the partners violates the expectations of another person, the violation can be appraised as a good or bad and the impact is that there will be a scene of emotions (Gottman and Levenson, 2002).

Partners who are in emotionally tranquil relationships may not be aware of the level of dependence on emotional investments. This may only be evident during a sudden interruption such as sudden death that results into explosion of the meshed interconnections. The interruption becomes intense and prolonged among the affected partners. Thus, when a person finds that another person is willing and capable of helping in fulfillment of the cherished hopes and intentions, new opportunities of meshing are created.

This can be done by doing interesting things together, making plans together that need to be accomplished by the other individual. There are certain people who have the ability to respond to others’ needs and are vigilant for signs of rejection (Goetz, Keltner and Simon-Thomas, 2010). Thus, when they discover that a person has the ability to provide them with these needs, they tend to become friends with the person that results into love despite the possibility of harm that can result from the relationship. 3. Critical discussion of why being blinded by love can be detrimental to relationship satisfaction Most significant negative impact of being blinded by love is that the person who loves another person may be betrayed in a number of ways.

In other cases, the person who loves may also betray the person who is loved. For instance, in a family where there are a number of siblings under the care of both parents, there is the possibility of parents showing preference for a particular child and do not give other children the attention they give to the other children (Eisenberg, Liew and Pidada, 2001). On the other hand, these children may be loyal to them and want to be associated with their parents. However, the parents may not be concerned with their upbringing and may not give them the right parental care and guide needed to make them responsible citizens.

Thus they may grow to become less obedient and undisciplined but unaware of the conditions happening to them. Consequently, they may involve themselves in activities that are against the morals of life and may be apprehended by authorities (Clark, Fitness and Brissette, 2001). This would lead to their detrimental as a result of betrayal from their parents. Another case where being blinded by love may be detrimental is the case where a man loves a woman and wants her to dedicate her time to nurture their relationship.

He would expect the woman to be available when he needs her, present herself well as only having him as the partner and cooperate with him in solving issues that surround them. When a man feels that a particular woman possesses these qualities, he may be blinded to fall in love with her hoping that he will benefit from her care, cooperation in solving issues in their relationship and also remain faithful to her (Clark and Finkel, 2005). On the other hand, both the spouses may betray the relationship and it can be detrimental in the end.

This may happen in a case where the woman may be having affairs or relationship with other men apart from the man who hopes that she is faithful to him. The detrimental impacts may even be visible without the man discovering that the woman is unfaithful to hm. For instance, she may be unwilling to cooperate in solving issues that surround them and also unavailable to the man at the time of need for company (Berscheid and Ammazzalorso, 2001).

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