Key Aspects of Counselling Session - Essay Example

The main aim of this essay is to highlight the session I had with a counselor and how the session has impacted on me. The session which I had with the counselor was taped and that has helped me to analyses and reviews the conversation in detail. This essay will also cover the feelings that I had before entering the counseling session, during the counseling session and how I felt after the counseling session. There were observations of the key skills that has been used by the counsellor.There will be also analysis of the favorable response and unfavorable response given by counsellor.The overall experience felt by me will be given in the essay. The personal perception of the session will be discussed along with the counseling skills that I had gathered before the counseling session. I had planned a counseling session on the topic of alcohol rehabilitation which I had. I attended a counseling session with a mental health nurse specialist.Jarvis, (1998) has stated that there should be goal in counseling and that can be achieved by experiments. Velleman (1992) has also stated that the goals should be achievable and Dale and Marsh (2000) have stated that the goals and experiments will give therapy a direction. The experiments should be done in a case to case basis as said by Siegel, 1998.Collins has stated that the family should have been more supportive of alcohol patients to help them out but if not done counseling should be done. The counselor was a qualified female nurse. The feelings before attending the counselling I had spent time thinking over what I would like to discuss, how I would put my issues word, how much information would be appropriate to tell her and I also had doubt about what her reaction would be. I had serious apprehension that the counsellor would be thinking or keeping me in low esteem when I try to disclose the issue of alcoholism. I also thought whether she would be professional enough to keep or understand my problem in correct perspective. I also had fear that certain embarrassing or too personal questions that can put me on spot will be fired at me.Afterall I was happy that I could gain more insight to my problems and feelings in nature. The counselor’s room I entered the counselor’s room when I was called for. I was motioned to sit in a chair. I was seated in a comfortable chair with a suitable space between myself and the counselor. We were positioned facing each other. I observed my surroundings and noticed that the office had a large window behind the counselor. There was a vivid blue abstract picture on the wall, a small coffee table was next to the counselor, and the table also had a phone, tissue papers and a jug of water on top. The door was kept closed after I entered and other patients were to wait outside which made me feel capable to speak clearly to the counselor without fear of being overhead by others. The overall set up of the office made me feel comfortable and relaxed; my expectations of how the room should be set up were noted in accordance with a description given by Geldard and Gerald (2005) that suggests that special purpose counselling rooms help clients feel comfortable in a counselling context. The starting of discussion The counselor initiated the rapport process with non threatening questions asking me how my day was and we have a quick discussion on minor issues such as the weather, work and the recent job I have started. I was feeling relaxed and confident as the conversation was progressing as the non threatening conversation did not have an emotional impact on me. Slowly, I proceeded to tell her my story about my problem with alcohol and issues and I was having, my feelings and thoughts towards AA meetings and coping strategies I was using. I choose to discuss issues I had about my decision not to attend AA meetings on my completion of an alcohol rehabilitation program. She listened, asked questions, responded with comparisons and advice and told me some general information on the subject. The Taking forward of discussion or depth analysis The conversation became more in-depth when counselor asked “What has been happening for you lately”. The question was open ended as I could describe my feelings rather than say yes or no to the question. I took the opportunity to tell the counselor my alcohol problem. Throughout my story ,the counselor used active listening skills and minimal responses like nodding her head,uttering ‘uh’, ‘mmm,’ ‘I see’. The counselor had maintained good eye contact with me all through these stages. Due to the fact the counselor was using active listening skills I was feeling confident, supported, secure and valued that my story was worth listening to. I also felt that she was not only listening but really taking in what I was saying to her. The counselor seemed genuinely interested in what I was saying and seemed to understand how I was feeling. I also felt a feeling of empathy on the part of counselor. She was also smiling and looking at me in a friendly and encouraging manner which made me feel welcome and liked. I started saying about my feelings of attending AA meetings and I said that I believed I would not benefit attending those meetings. For me, that was a trigger to start drinking once again. I also added that it was in my best interest that I felt that I should stay away from the meeting. I also told her of my decision to start my studying and learn as much as I could, and that I was keep busy with my new job .I was in the habit of spending my weekends out with my sister and going out with friends to cafes and restaurants, going to movies and exercising regularily. The counselor responded after some thought and said that ‘my friend goes to meetings and some of the meetings she goes to are really enjoyable and that it has helped her stay sober for a number of years’. I was startled to hear this but responded quickly that “yes I know they are helpful for some people but I haven’t felt like drinking since I left North side and rarely even think about it. I don’t think its worth to attend meetings. When I was going to meeting at North side I always felt like having a drink after wards, so for me I feel more harmful than good.” The counselor had listened to my talk and responded saying ‘another friend of mine goes to meetings and also said she feels like she needs a drink after going there. She attends meetings but not on a regular basis and occasionally still drinks. My sister had a drinking problem and told me that after attending meetings she was managing to cut down the amount she consumed’. The negatives that I felt about the discussion I felt uneasy by the response of the counselor that involved her friends and sisters and also felt was not appropriate at the time. Since she directed the conversation towards situations she felt were similar to mine, she did not allow me to discuss my problem further. I had wanted to delve deeper into the reasons for my choice and discuss previous conversations I had had with the psychiatrists at Northside to support my choice. Therefore she missed out on information that was very important, as she had not let me fully explain my situation and she did not completely understand why I had come to see her. Throughout the counsellor’s stories about her friends and sisters drinking problems, I was feeling disconnected from the conversation as I did not know who her friends or sister were, and I was not particularly interested in their problems. I did not feel that looking at similarities between myself and her friends . I was looking to share my individual feelings and thoughts on the matter and I was frustrated that I was not given the opportunity too. As the counselor spoke about her friends and sister she was very animated and was laughing, this made me feel isolated and bewildered as I was not find it amusing since it is a very serious problem for me. I noted that she was showing no empathy at this point towards me and my situation. It was a total change in the circumstances’ and I was thinking that I was talking to an alien. The advises that the counselor gave me The counselor then went on to advise me of the different meetings she knew of in the local area, the size of the meetings and the format of the meetings. She also advised me to at least attend one in the near future to see if I changed my mind. I had already researched the meetings and knew when they were on and all of the details so I did not find this helpful. As I had attended many meetings during my stay at North side I did not need to attend a meeting to see if I liked them and thought I would have been best to further discuss the triggers associated to attending meetings. I felt bored by the conversation at this point as she was relaying information that I already knew and I was also perplexed by being told to see I liked the meetings as I had already told her that they were a trigger for drinking and I had been to quite a few already. That meant that she had not listened to what I was trying to say and I felt pained and detached with the situation. We then had the following discussion: Me - “I’m not going to any gatherings of friends or family and I’m staying away from parties, pubs and clubs for the next year, I find that they are a trigger for me to drink” Counsellor – ‘I think you should still be able to go out and enjoy yourself, you know you can’t drink but that should not stop you from being able to go out and have a social life at your age”. Me – “I have been going out but just for dinners and lunch because I am not tempted to drink” Counsellor – “but you will have to deal with this sometime and you can’t sit at home and isolate yourself” I felt that this was bad advice as I was enjoying a social life in an environment that I felt safe. To advise me at such an early stage of sobriety that I should attempt to go to functions I thought was dangerous. Also she does not know me very well and did not have any real idea how I would cope if I were in the situation of being around people that were drinking, she was quick to assume that I would be able to handle that situation. I felt as though I was being viewed as inadequate for not being competent to have an unrestricted social life. The ending of session When our session was finished, we had decided to meet in two weeks to take forward my problem and how I was coping. How I felt about the counselling I did not feel that I had been able to reach my goal of having a better understanding of my situation. What should have the counselor done from my point of view I think the session would have been more productive if the counselor used different skills such as: Listening skills – The counselor should have listened to my feelings more. Understanding skills: The counselor then should have tried to understand my problems by standing on my shoes and viewing the problem. Not trying to force down something: The counselor should not be trying to force her feelings on me. Not every person is same: The counselor should understand that every person is not same and every person will be having different feelings. What I understood about the counselling skills using my experience The experience overall has made me realize how important it is to use correct counselling skills. Unfortunately I was left feeling frustrated, annoyed and extremely disappointed when I got home as I did not feel like I had been given the opportunity to clearly tell the counselor what my issue was and how I felt. I was doubtful that her advice would be accurate as she knew very little about me and most of what was said to me was based on assumptions. I also felt my problem was belittled due to the lack of empathy and consideration given to me. My future course of action I decided that at my next appointment I will try to talk to her in greater depth about my feelings and thoughts in order for her to gain a clearer understanding of who I am, and from there decide whether I will continue counselling with her or try another counselor. Reference Collins, R. (1990) Family treatment of alcohol abuse: behavioral and systems perspectives in Collins, R., Leonard, K. & Searles, J, (1990) (Eds) Alcohol and the Family: Research and Clinical Perspectives. New York: Guildford Press Dale, A., Marsh, A., 2000," Evidence Based Practice Indicators for Alcohol and Other Drug Interventions: Literature Review" School of Psychology, Curtin University of Technology: Perth, Australia Geldard, D., & Geldard, K., 2005, Basic personal counseling: A training manual for counselors (5thed. P.332). Sydney: Pearson Education. Jarvis, T., Copeland, J., Walton, L., 1998, "Exploring the relationship between child sexual abuse and substance use among women", Addiction, Vol.93 (6), pp. 865-866 Siegal, H. (1998) Comprehensive case management for substance abuse treatment. (Treatment Improvement Protocol (TIP) Series 27.) Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration: Rockville, MD Velleman, R., 1992, "The use of volunteer counselors in helping problem drinkers: community work in action?”, Journal of Mental Health, Vol.1, 301-310 Read More

There was a vivid blue abstract picture on the wall, a small coffee table was next to the counselor, and the table also had a phone, tissue papers and a jug of water on top. The door was kept closed after I entered and other patients were to wait outside which made me feel capable to speak clearly to the counselor without fear of being overhead by others. The overall set up of the office made me feel comfortable and relaxed; my expectations of how the room should be set up were noted in accordance with a description given by Geldard and Gerald (2005) that suggests that special purpose counselling rooms help clients feel comfortable in a counselling context.

The starting of discussion The counselor initiated the rapport process with non threatening questions asking me how my day was and we have a quick discussion on minor issues such as the weather, work and the recent job I have started. I was feeling relaxed and confident as the conversation was progressing as the non threatening conversation did not have an emotional impact on me. Slowly, I proceeded to tell her my story about my problem with alcohol and issues and I was having, my feelings and thoughts towards AA meetings and coping strategies I was using.

I choose to discuss issues I had about my decision not to attend AA meetings on my completion of an alcohol rehabilitation program. She listened, asked questions, responded with comparisons and advice and told me some general information on the subject. The Taking forward of discussion or depth analysis The conversation became more in-depth when counselor asked “What has been happening for you lately”. The question was open ended as I could describe my feelings rather than say yes or no to the question.

I took the opportunity to tell the counselor my alcohol problem. Throughout my story ,the counselor used active listening skills and minimal responses like nodding her head,uttering ‘uh’, ‘mmm,’ ‘I see’. The counselor had maintained good eye contact with me all through these stages. Due to the fact the counselor was using active listening skills I was feeling confident, supported, secure and valued that my story was worth listening to. I also felt that she was not only listening but really taking in what I was saying to her.

The counselor seemed genuinely interested in what I was saying and seemed to understand how I was feeling. I also felt a feeling of empathy on the part of counselor. She was also smiling and looking at me in a friendly and encouraging manner which made me feel welcome and liked. I started saying about my feelings of attending AA meetings and I said that I believed I would not benefit attending those meetings. For me, that was a trigger to start drinking once again. I also added that it was in my best interest that I felt that I should stay away from the meeting.

I also told her of my decision to start my studying and learn as much as I could, and that I was keep busy with my new job .I was in the habit of spending my weekends out with my sister and going out with friends to cafes and restaurants, going to movies and exercising regularily. The counselor responded after some thought and said that ‘my friend goes to meetings and some of the meetings she goes to are really enjoyable and that it has helped her stay sober for a number of years’.

I was startled to hear this but responded quickly that “yes I know they are helpful for some people but I haven’t felt like drinking since I left North side and rarely even think about it. I don’t think its worth to attend meetings. When I was going to meeting at North side I always felt like having a drink after wards, so for me I feel more harmful than good.” The counselor had listened to my talk and responded saying ‘another friend of mine goes to meetings and also said she feels like she needs a drink after going there.

She attends meetings but not on a regular basis and occasionally still drinks. My sister had a drinking problem and told me that after attending meetings she was managing to cut down the amount she consumed’.

Read More