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Far From the Tree - Book Report/Review Example

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In the paper “Far From the Tree” the author analyzes Andrew Solomon’s book, which talks about parents of children with severe medical problems which he refers to them as vertical identities and other-undesirable acquired traits which he refers to as horizontal identities…
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Far From the Tree
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Identity- Far From the Tree of the al Affiliation Andrew Solomon book Far From the Tree talks about parents of children withsevere medical problems which he refers to them as vertical identities and other undesirable acquired traits which he refers to as horizontal identities. From Down syndrome and dwarfism to autism and schizophrenia, Solomon delivers the collection of news that by any stretch of the imagination appeared unthinkable besides enlightening the audience on the bare truth parent face when in such circumstances. He forcefully showcases parents who are not only horrified by the differences they encounter in their children but who rise to the occasion of embracing such abnormalities. Through this, the author exemplifies cases of sparkling humanity that speaks volume to parent’s impulse to give their children the best. In this world, nothing is more satisfying and rates better to a parent than to have a successful and devoted children. In the same strength, it can be heartbreaking beyond repairs for parents with children exhibiting abnormal characteristics such as failure of the children to conform to the known standards. Because of the transmission of some of the identity from one generation to another, most children tend to correspond to their parents in some way. The genes are transmitted through the genetic strands known as DNA, which pass the genetic information from the parents to the child (Solomon, 2012). It is inevitable for children not to resemble the parent in some way. As such, to control and influence the child to conform to standard behaviors is a long-life mission each parent. Basically, a parent is the children as they represent them in many aspects. The sense of being a parent can never leave someone who has braved all the developmental stages of the baby from fertilization to birth and child rearing, Solomon argues. A baby cannot exist alone as they are part of the relationship. As much as they are our best admirers, they can also be our worst distractors. Ironically, most people take pride in how different they are from their parents but they are endlessly sad at how their children are different from them (Solomon, 2012). It is, therefore, hard for parents to confront cases of abnormal medical conditions such as autism and dwarfism. As Solomon notes, parents can expend an enormous deal of energy to rectify such abnormalities. It stresses them as it does to the child as the child also have to live with that fear, regret and constant ridicule from peers for the perceived defective traits. Cases of vertical identities are, however, are rather easy to accept as the illness that could be confronted or in worst case scenario lived with it. The problem is when a child starts to develop and inhibit horizontal traits that are more commonly described by behaviors that are not exhibited by other children of the same gender or age. In this particular case, Solomon gives the classical case of his favorite color when he was young. He was more inclined to pink which is associated with girls and his mother always considered it offensive for his taste of color. To her, it was rather unusual. Solomon, sexual orientation was different from that of his gender and similarly the color he would choose would be different from what the mothers thought best for him. It was rather hard for his mother to live with it, and it is the case that is seen in many parents. They would always want to set those ‘awkward behaviors’ straight. In such cases happen when a child exhibit marked difference from the rest of his or her cohorts, this demands competence, knowledge and actions that a typical mother or father is inadequate to give partly owing to the fact that a parent would always want the child to conform to the standard behaviors and lack the necessary knowledge on the issue. The child in such instances is expressly different from most of his or her peers and, therefore, less understood or accepted, Solomon observes. It is true that the vertical identities tend to be reinforced from the earliest time they are detected. They are usually respected and accepted as identities. However, many parents will tend to oppose the horizontal identities and treat them as profound flaws that should be ironed out with any means possible. Identity is rather a mammoth to confront for parents. At one point, they need to control their children and some point to the right direction and sometimes it is just too much to stop. Any parents do not want to raise a child who would not be a disappointment whether to them or in the eyes of society. As such it becomes a personal effort for the parents to ensure that the child has the best upbringing. With the modern day freedom and individual rights, there is often an area of conflict between the parent’s wishes and the children desires. For instance, a country such as The United States have passed laws that safeguard the rights of some of the ‘horizontal identities’-gay-identified by Solomon. Confronting a youth not to be who he or she is would be a challenge. As much as the parent would not be considered as a father or a mother to a gay son or daughter, there is little that can be done in such instances. It is a battle the parent would be destined to lose. For the case of disabled children, the issue is more the same. Though there maybe acceptance, dealing with a disabled child is rather a gruel some task as Solomon in his book outlines. The parents are faced with many choices when bringing up a disabled child. These options may range from terminating a job opportunity to changing of lifestyle to suit the disabled child. It is always hard and trying moment for the parent and may require difficult decisions to be made. Most importantly to note, acceptance is not always a choice for many. Self-denial that this did not happen or will change become a constant solace for parents until reality dawns on them that the disability is permanent and little can be changed. The parents could be willing to use any form of medication so long as they are assured the disability can be rectified to standard (Lyon & Segal, 2013). There are no words that can describe the anguish of bringing up a disabled child. In one of the profiled cases, when a parent walked through a park, there was always those constant glares. The public stigma may be too much to bear to an already traumatized soul. In this regard, many states have enacted laws to safeguard the rights of the marginalized few such as the disabled, the intellectually challenged and those who shows another form of disorders. Despite that, discrimination is a rife though it this may not happen openly. Just as the Solomon was denied a chance to join a school for his perceived inability to read and write, there are many institutions that deny the suitability of a candidate based on someone’s disability. Nevertheless, if such cases arise, there are actionable under the court of law, and the affected victim has a right to sue for discrimination based on disability (Lyon & Segal, 2013). With the current economic hardship, living with a disabled child may prove more difficult despite the government appeal to support parents who rescind their job opportunities to support their disabled children. In conclusion, Solomon stresses a common dilemma for parents: all parent must navigate the tension between illness and identity or between acceptance and cure. He poses a rather rhetorical question: should be the deaf child be inspired to learn sign language and unite with the deaf community; or on the converse, encouraged to learn and read the lips so as perfect and better assimilate the ordinary world? Should a parent of a dwarf child make him or her feel comfortable about their size or should be subjected to limb-lengthening operations? Are the parents of the deeply disabled child have the moral rights to authorize improved medical procedures to control the defections? At what point should a parent influence how the children wear? (Solomon, 2012) Identity is rather a world where any parent would not trounce with absolute control nor certainty particularly in the modern days. References Solomon, A. (2012). Far from the tree: Parents, children and the search for identity. Simon and Schuster. Lyon, G. J., & Segal, J. P. (2013). Practical, ethical and regulatory considerations for the evolving medical and research genomics landscape. Applied & Translational Genomics, 2, 34-40. Read More
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