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Erikson Stages and Ecological Systems - Essay Example

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The paper "Erikson Stages and Ecological Systems" highlights that my family experience helped to understand how important is to have real contact with children without unhealthy attachment that is why I will raise my son a responsible but independent personality. …
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Erikson Stages and Ecological Systems
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It is always both challenging and very exciting to apply famous psychological concepts to personal experience. First, it gives practical understanding of theoretical material, and this practical understanding is crucial for grasping the message of the theory. Second, using the concepts that received approval and recognition for personal purposes is very fruitful as it allows analyzing yourself from the perspective of a psychologist, more objectively and indirectly. As a result a person may have an insight on his past and present and understand and plan his future better and more effectively. Applying Erikson`s concepts to my personal life was exceptionally interesting for me because it is probably the only model that helps to trace the consequences of development on each stage of personality development from early childhood to the end of life. I like the fact that it is not limited by childhood only like most psychosexual concepts that aim to find all the problems of an adult person in infant years. Erikson`s theory of development is logical, fundamental, and very effective. Erikson managed to develop Freud`s theory of personality focusing his attention on social environment and applying it to psychological development. In his 8-stage theory of development he connected the progress of a human with specific struggle between two categories on each level of human life (Despair and Integrity, for example). The conflict of these two opposite characteristics of personality serves as a driving force for progress. Erikson also regarded each stage as a potential cause of pathology: if one stage is not completed the person is prone to repeat it over and over. It truly served me as a source of inspiration and pushed me to deep meditations about my personal life. Analyzing my life from Erikson`s perspective helped to see how I can improve my life further and make reasonable and achievable plans for future. Thus, Erik Erikson divided human life into 8 stages, and I am going to describe my personal life from the perspective of each stage. First stage lasts from birth till 2 years in general and it is called Trust vs. Mistrust. The main responsibility during this phase lies on baby`s caregivers. If the basic needs in physical care, emotional contact, attention are not satisfied or satisfied episodically, the baby may get stuck on this phase and experience mistrust to the surrounding world. I was born on 7/22/78 and was the first and only child in a family. Naturally, I don`t remember this stage but as far as I can judge I have learned to trust people and do not expect them to disappoint me and betray me. My mother really wanted to have a baby that is why she dedicated most of her free time to providing me with a good and timely care. What is important, she was genuine in her care relying mostly on her personal mother instincts rather than on some guides and books. Autonomy vs. Shame (18 months- 36 months). During the second stage infants have to develop a feeling of autonomy basing on certain skills such as caring about oneself and understanding the reactions of oneself. Inability to do it results in shame, the negative trait that will accompany person`s life. During my second and third years of development I received less attention because of the busy schedule of my parents and that is why I had to start interpreting by own needs myself. However, I can`t say that I was deprived of attention and care. My father started to spend more time with me compared to the first two years. That is probably because some men are prone to perceive children as theirs only when they start to talk. In any case one of my first memories connected to my family was the memory in which my father is playing with me near our house. I grew up very independent and very autonomous so I can say that I passed this stage of development successfully. Initiative vs. Guilt (3 years-5 years) During this stage children learn to imitate parents` life and experience the Oedipal complex which they need to resolve with the help of social, extended family identification. According to Freud, during this stage children may feel attraction to the parent of the opposite gender and ambivalent feelings towards the same sex parent. I was a daddy`s girl as far as I can say at that period as my father used to indulge me during my early childhood. But my negative feeling to my mother disappeared naturally when I started spending more and more time with my cousins. Fortunately we visited our relatives often and I was involved into family life very actively at that time. It is considered that a girl can resolve the Oedipus’s conflict with the desire of having her own child. At that age I used to play with my favorite baby doll all the time so apparently that is how my resolution of attraction to my father was manifested. Industry vs. Inferiority (6 years-12 years) During this period children learn how to interact successfully with peers placing parents on the background. Such virtue as competence must be achieved on this stage. If not the divorce of my parents that period would pass smoothly as well in my life. At this period the parenting style of my parents changed very abruptly and it is now really clear why. Before the separation parents managed to provide me with some consistent support: hey were demanding by they explained me the things I had to do. Moreover they were supportive and involved. However, when my mother left alone after my father remarried when I was ten, she chose authoritive parenting to control me more. She needed it because she was not able to deal with the child herself and was confused for some time probably. My mother used to give me a lot of directions and punish me if I did not follow them. Unfortunately, she also was concentrated on herself and paid little attention to my personal needs. It had some positive as well as negative effect on me: I grew up very attached to my mother but very responsible at the same time. I did not have good friends at that time and that was one of the most serious reasons of my poor ability to build social contacts in future. However, despite the fact that my family was incomplete on the level of microsystem I didn`t feel deprived of anything. At that time our extended family supported us and I felt that support. School and church were other factors influencing my microsystem though this influence was not direct but in some indirect way I realized that there is some unity in society. Identity vs. Role Confusion (12 years- 18 years) On this stage a teenager must rely on himself and create meaningful contact with peers, and it is necessary to develop some stable moral principles and believes that would guide a person throughout the years. During the school time I used to spend my free hours helping my mother mostly as she suffered from depression. I guess that was the main reason why it was difficult for me to form meaningful relationship with people of my age. That did not permit me to understand who I am and what qualities I have as well. Most girls of my age had first relationship and spent their time with friends while I had no opportunity to have such a life. At the age of 18 I found out that my mother had possible borderline personality or bi-polar and the relationship with her got worse. That is why I had to face the coining of Identity on the next stage of development. Additionally I was rather short in school that is why the feeling of insecurity and frustration were familiar during teenage years. That also did not permit me seeing myself as future woman to some extent. However, taking care about my mother allowed me to understand that I want to help people in future as it suits my inner nature. On this stage I felt the impact of macrosystem on my life including our local community, politics, media. I suppose that these manifestations of society made American people what they are. My family was not involved into political issues or social life of community and I see it as a disadvantage now because that could have helped us to feel more engaged and more sociable. During my teenage years I also was affected by media as most school boys and girls and wanted to have everything what was on the TV but fortunately I overgrew that period of enchantment by media and now feel indifferent to it. Intimacy vs. Isolation (18 years -35 years) On this stage a person has to create successful relationships with partners and friends. Inability to do that or previous failure may cause permanent further isolation. Unfortunately my inability to resolve the conflict between Identity and Role Confusion due to the family situation affected this stage of development as well. I was torn apart between my disabled mother and the necessity to build my own life. I continued living with my mother until the age of 35. Most of the time despite being with people I felt isolated and lonely until the moment I met the father of my child and my future husband on 10/6/2012. Painful separation from my mother preceded that meeting but I am sure if not the second I could be left isolated for the rest of my life. Unfortunately, my mother could not cope with our separation and reacted unexpectedly: she sold all my items and my home, took all the profit. So I literally had to restart with nothing. But I have realized that children have to live their parents in order to become adults themselves and I realized it a bit late but not too late. I found out that I want to take care about my own family and that I am ready for that. That is why the birth of my child became one of the most important events in my life. Ironically I managed to resolve the conflict between Isolation and Intimacy only by the end of this stage but I guess I needed more time because of the problems on the previous stages. Generativity vs. Stagnation (35 years-65 years) This is the most productive period because most people managed to build families and find stable jobs. Now they have to contribute to raising children, building relationships with my husband, and getting promoted in career. This is the period of achievements. I have just entered this stage and I see that I have entered it successfully. I have a better communication with my father now which is important for me. The birth of my son made me realize that I must do more for him as I want to give him everything I was deprived during my childhood in both material and non-material aspects. It is interesting to see how my son made me forget about all the troubles of the past and concentrate on our family. Though we still have ups and downs in our relationships with my husband, we both understand that marriage requires hard work. Now I am aware of my anxiety and attachments and understand that I have to work on the. My personal achievement is that I started college a year ago after multiple attempts. This step is very important for me as I did it in order to make better life for a new baby and to develop as a professional myself. I also realized that my experience and my responsibility will contribute to my profession: I love helping people, I am very determined, attentive and patient. I am very good with people at work that what helped me to become a nationally certified pharmacy technician. Though I can`t say that it is easy to combine parental responsibilities with studying I feel that I have enough emotional resources and energy to do it as I am eventually on the right track according to Erikson. Integrity vs. Despair (65 years- till death) During this part people have to become aware of the fact that they are responsible not only for the close relatives but for the society and humanity as whole and bring something useful to this world which would outlive them. I hope by the time I am 65 I will become a professional in my sphere and will have my own practice. My family experience helped to understand how important is to have real contact with children without unhealthy attachment that is why I will raise my son a responsible but independent personality. It can become a guarantee of the development of our relationship after his marriage. I hope to be involved into his life when he has his own children and help to take care of them. Additionally I will try to get involved into life of my community on a more profound level as that will help me to develop Integrity. Read More
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