The Role of Friendship Experience in Personal Development - Literature review Example

The Role of Friendship Experience in Personal Development Sur s The Role of Friendship Experience in Personal Development Abstract The aim of this study was to investigate through the analysis of Louisa’s Interview and Interview Transcript the impact of friendship on person’s life and self-reception. These data were taken from the HEA website for further thematic analysis. Using this approach I’ve selected extracts, relating back of the analysis to the research question and literature. Through this interview Louisa discusses her experience of friendship and challenges related to friendship she has already met. I’ve highlighted main traits of friendship phenomena, such as complicity to certain social group, confidence in surroundings, as well as trauma experience caused by betrayal, and showed their influence on personality development. The example of Louisa proves the statement that personality growth is related to continuously increasing reciprocity in interpersonal relationships. The impact of the friendship on psychological well-being, as well as the influence of personal qualities on the experience of friendship cannot be underestimated. Introduction Friendship is a very significant interpersonal relationship, the importance of which in human’s life cannot be underestimated. At the same time, there are lots of different kinds of relationships, but all they have enough mutual traits. They are enormous bound of mutual trust and special regard, cemented by equal self-disclosure. Very often friendship involves love as well, which parallels romantic love (Thomas, 1987, p. 217-218). It is also well-known that friendship is very important for the psychological well-being, such as self-esteem and positive feelings of self-worth, while those who have a lack of friendship may be at risk for psychological maladaptation. Children who experience problems with friendship are less protected from the victimization and have a lack of social skills (Wojslawowicz, Rubin, & Burgess, 2006, p. 672). Thus, the aim of this analysis is to investigate the impact of personal qualities such as self-confidence, friendliness and reliability on the experience of friendship. On the example of Louise’s interview will see the view of friendship from the experience of a young woman, who has already experienced some failures in friendship. Methodology The data used for this analysis was Louise’s Interview and Transcript from a study researching friendship. Through this interview Louisa discusses her experience of friendship and challenges related to friendship she has already met. These data were taken from the HEA website for further thematic analysis. Thematic analysis is a method for identifying, analyzing and reporting patterns within data. It is theoretically flexible and accessible approach to analyzing qualitative data. Using this approach I’ve selected extracts, relating back of the analysis to the research question and literature. Due to the flexibility of this method, I had a wide range of analytic options (Brown & Clarke, 2006, p. 78). Thus I had an opportunity to carve out pieces of narrative evidence. Analysis Through the very beginning it was rather interesting to watch after the Louisa’s behavior on the interview. The interviewer tried to make for her friendly atmosphere. He started their meeting by discussing weather and clothes – all that do all friendly people. Still, it didn’t seem to me that Louisa felt herself free and comfortable. Later my hypothesis was proved: though Louisa seems to be rather easy going, in reality she doesn’t. She considers friendship to be an important part of her life, thus it is difficult enough for her to trust a stranger. Nevertheless, Louisa told a lot about own vision of friendship. Louisa told that friendship is a kind of escape from lonely. “…I’d rather sit with someone cause I hate to be on my own when there’s people, I like to be round people and interacting with people all the time … I think you need friends, it’s sort of like a necessity in life … You need friends like support, someone to rely on and trust and just someone to have a good time with and spend your time with … I’d rather spend my life with someone than on my own …” It proves that friend is the one who loves you and accepts you with all your strengths and weaknesses, who wills to share with both joy of success pain of defeat, who always ready to help. Everyone needs friend and when such this need is not replenished, the person feels very lonely (Wiggins, 1986, p. 592). Still Louisa, in my opinion, may be a true friend, and lucky those who made friends with here. And now I am going to prove my statement: “…who are really close friends you will find out when you move, because they are people who wanna stay in touch and who make the effort to see you and you make the effort to see them…” These were her words while she was talking about her school and college friends who moved to another place. While she was talking she seems to be upset about the inevitability of parting with friends (Crosnoe, 2000, p. 384). It seems she tried her best to save at least some of her childhood friends: “…she’d done a lot of growing up, cause when we were at school she was very bad tempered…thus it wasn’t awkward seeing her, cause we had loads to talk about cause we hadn’t seen each other for two years but other people … you have got nothing to talk about…” That is how Louisa describes her old friend with whom she still stays in touch, comparing her with other friendship relations which have already failed. At the same time the ability to forgive when your friend needs it, as this is important for interacting with each other. One should remember that everybody is an imperfect person. Sure, some mistakes and failures in friendship cannot be forgotten, but at least they have to be accepted and forgiven (Pignatelli, 2011, p. 227). Louisa describes an accident when she was let down by a friend because she and Louisa’s boyfriend had an intercourse behind her back and it affected Louisa quite badly. Now she finds it harder to trust people, but still she cannot forget about someone who’s that close to her. Finally, Louisa’s case demonstrates that the most important factor for keeping friends is having some common interests or mutual habits, even if it is smoking. Such bonding things may lay the beginning for a wonderful friendship (George & Hartmann, 1996, p. 2309). In other case things turn like that: “…People on my course are a different group to the people I live with, definitely, I can act differently with them as well…I am more confident with the people I live with, while with the people on my course I have to get to know them before I let them to get to know me…” To sum up my analysis I’d like to say a few words about Louisa’s body language and behavior on the interview. She seems to be not very confident person, and she felt herself not very comfortable on the interview, though she behaved as if she was talkative and cheerful and everything was OK. Still, I think that problems in friendship are a rather painful issue for her and Louisa’s story about the betrayal of her friend with her boyfriend proves this statement, though she successfully hides her feelings, while talking. Without watching video, but only using the video transcript I couldn’t recognize her pain points which Louisa had no opportunity to hide in her speech and behavior. Thus both watching and reading the interview turn to be an important part of the analytic process. Discussion On the example of Louisa we may see the impact of the friendship on psychological well-being, as well as the influence of personal qualities on the experience of friendship. It proves the statement of the scientists, who consider that friendship provides a forum for the learning and refining of socioemotional skills (Crosnoe, 2000, p. 378). This is the way to learn to cooperate and challenge different perspectives. Friends give an opportunity to try new roles and identities and seek out for some affirmation. Finally friends help to develop the worldview different from one that parents have. Personality growth is associated with continuously increasing reciprocity in interpersonal relationships (Hansell, 1981, p. 61). But that is not all. On the example of Louisas interview we may see that friendship is a kind of escape from lonely. Friendship may teach us a lot of thing even though sometimes it is very painful to believe people (Furman & Bierman, 1983, p. 555). The experience of being betrayed may open the new horizons for development after one had already forgiven. Its a path to freedom. Friendship increases our capacity for emotions and makes us feel more dignified (Smith, 2005, p. 266). Therefore, a future direction for the study might be to investigate the influences of the previous friendship and love experience on the life in adulthood through conducting interviews with people over 30, as they have enough trauma experience to examine. References 1. Crosnoe, Robert. (2000) Friendships in Childhood and Adolescence: The Life Course and New Directions. Social Psychology Quarterly, 63(4), 377-391. 2. Furman, W. & Bierman, K.(1983) Developmental Changes in Young Chieldren’s Conceptions of Friendship. Child Development, 54(3), 549-556. 3. George, T.P. & Hartmann, D.P. (1996) Friendship Networks of Unpopular, Average, and Popular Children. Child Development, 67(5), 2301-2316. 4. Hansell, Stephen. (1981) Ego Development and Peer Friendship Networks. Sociology of Education, 54(1), 51-63. 5. Lynch, Sara. (2005) Philosophy and Friendship. Edinburgh University Press. 6. Pignatelli, Frank. (2011) Being Accountable.Schools: Studies in Education, 8(2), 215-230. 7. Smith, Tara. (2005) Egoistic Friendship. American Philosophical Quarterly, 42(4), 263-277. 8. Thomas, Laurence. (1987) Friendship. Synthese, 72(2), 217-236. 9. Wiggins, Emily. (1986) Just Friends: The Role of Friendship in Our Lives by L.B.Rubin. Family Relations, 35(4), 591-592. 10. Wojslawowicz, J.C., Rubin, K.H., & Burgess, K.B. (2006) Behavioral Characteristics Associated with Stable and Fluid Best Friendship Patterns in Middle Childhood. Merrill-Palmer Quarterly, 52(4), 671-693. Read More