Interaction With Others - Essay Example

Helper Self-Examination by Reflecting upon my qualities that could be helpful in my future profession I came to conclusion that the qualities that were valued in my family coincide much with those I will need working as a helper. Being patient is probably my primary virtue as I was raised in the house where patience and tolerance were considered necessary conditions of happy coexistence. Patience presupposes the ability to keep calm in emotionally charged situation, an ability to wait for the better moment for conflict solving, an ability to accept people and situations as they are. I also think that my caring nature is another important quality for my future occupation. I think that treating people with attention and putting their needs before personal needs is what care and love mean. However, it is important not to forget to be attentive to details and responsible when working with people. Everybody must understand that your word is worth believing and it is possible to rely on you in any difficult situation. Interaction with others is rather comfortable experience for me as I do not feel tension doing this. I can describe myself as a non-confrontational person as I do my best to avoid any disputes when it is possible. When disagreeing with people I keep in mind that it is necessary not to go to personal remarks. However, I sometimes can become quite detached and numb in the situation and make long pauses when it is not appropriate. I am trying to cope with this because I understand that distracting from real events is not the best quality for a future helper. I have also learned how to give support to people carefully without making them feel in debt. It is crucial to make others feel that any help is genuine and sincere, only in such case it is real assistance. What is strange that I have a problem with receiving help and pieces of advice. I often feel reluctant to getting assistance and can be stubborn. But I understand that this can be problematic for my future work and trying to change it because receiving help in many situations is as important as being able to give it. Despite my young age I guess I have a substantial life experience. My mother was a very strict woman who taught me to be disciplined and determined. She was very demanding when I studied at school and controlled my grades all the time. Any time when my grades were below 80 my mother refused me from going and playing outdoors. As a child I was very angry and anxious because of this but later I learned that this experience made me a stronger person and taught me to avoid procrastination at any price. I understood that for achieving something you have to work hard, and in many cases even harder than others. When other children played happily outside I was practicing math and English and eventually became who I am now. Going abroad to receive education was probably second the most serious event for me. I grew up as the only child in a family which is often considered quite negative for a child who can become egoistic. However, when I found myself in the situation when there was noone to rely on and the whole family was thousands miles away I understood that it was time to grow up quickly. I had to learn how to take decisions really fast, how to take responsibilities for these decisions, how to remain strong and, what is more important , positive, in any complicated situation. I also understood what independence means. Though independence may initially seem as certain freedom in reality it is more of logical planning and acting wisely. I also learned to value my family more as when you can see your close people only one time in a year you understand how precious this time is. I am happy to receive the chance of living abroad and learning the culture of another country as it is interesting to compare Asian and Western values, traditions, and moral norms. Despite my cosmopolitism I still feel connection to Chinese background and appreciate what my country taught me. Respect to people was one of the most important messaged that I learned from my culture. Children are taught to be honorific to adults from early age. For example, when addressing to relatives or greeting them in the morning it is necessary to emphasize their family status not their name (Aunt, Uncle, Grandma etc.). It is crucial to consider every word when talking to elders regardless whether they are your relatives or just strangers. Filial duty is another important aspect of Chinese culture which derives from the concept of respect. My parents visit my grandparents once a week, and every time going to grandparents they buy some gifts. Also, my parents give grandparents money to travel once a year so my grandfather and grandmother do not feel lonely. When I am in China on vacation, my parents insist that it is also my duty to visit my grandparents and show my care and respect to them. Another message I have learnt from my parents is using love as life philosophy. It is necessary to change people`s lives for better and help them in need because that is what love means. And my parents applied this principle to life in the times of Wenchuan Earthquake; they were trying to adopt a child because they saw a lot of children who had lost families due to the catastrophe. Our family also donates some food and money every time when we see there is a disaster somewhere. Parents often educate me to help the people in need, support those people who have unlucky situation, and always be kind to people. I certainly will be affected by group identities I belong to in my work. First and most obvious is my national identity which is Chinese but I consider that this identity will influence positively my work only. In my country which is extremely diverse we have about fifty six ethnic minorities and that is why Chinese learn to respect minorities from early age. I am also very liberal and tolerant to differences and for me communicating and helping people of various races and nationalities can be rather exciting experience. However, people working with me might have some difficulties with my nationality if they are not as tolerant as I towards cultural and racial differences. However, I might have some problems with accepting differences in sexual orientation of people. Chinese are very conservative in the questions of orientation and relationships, and even in our modern world dealing with people with non-traditional sexual orientation can be challenging for many of them including me. I do not think that it will cause a lot of problems because people rarely demonstrate their differences but I guess I will have to accustom to this and accept various sexual orientations in future. Learning about helping relationships will certainly be beneficial for my personal and social life. I believe that such skills as successful conflicts management, assistance, an ability to listen are the skills that can be trained. The more you change the smoother your relationships with the world become, so I expect I will become more confident, communicable, and socially intelligent. I am Economics major, and running my own business is what I want to do after graduation. , I also think that learning helping relationship may help me to become a better leader. Finally I am planning to build a “Hope School” for those countryside children who do not have much money to get education so social skills will be crucial for me in this case. I guess that I am very compassionate person. Being surrounded by many people in my childhood I got tuned to understanding people around me, interpreting their emotional state very well. So compassion can be my strength that can become really valuable in helping relationships. I am also very skillful in listening people though it may sound strange for many people but the ability to listen and to hear is not something given for granted. My friends mark that I am not much of a speaker but when there is a need to listen to understand and to give advice I am the best variant. However, as a person lacking much experience I still doubt that I will be able to help people to such an extent that they will have a possibility to help themselves further. Lack of practice can be a challenge for me in many situations. For example, older people are really reluctant to working with young and fresh girls like me so I will have to keep this probable challenge in mind and be exceptionally attentive and comforting with them. The other challenge is personal involvement. I can hardly predict how the problems of the others will influence my own psychological state. It is not accidental that professional psychotherapists also have counselors who help them solve internal problems. Emotional burden of others is actually a serious thing to handle that is why it is important to prepare oneself to it. I guess thinking of several mechanisms to deal with it can be my solution. Inability to deal with emotional problems of the others and lack of experience can prevent me from becoming an effective helper. People often underestimate how biased they are regarding certain issues until they face them directly. I think I also have biases and blind spots regarding helping relationships that I still cannot understand without practical experience. For me the nature of relationships between a helper and a client is biased. Creating friendly relationships with clients is probably one of the most evident biases. When one is involved into the life of the other so much there is a possibility to build tight connections. However, keeping healthy boundaries and not letting personal affection influence work is what is required from a helper in my opinion. So it is important not to become a victim of bias about probable friendly relationships as they can influence negatively the whole of work. Another bias concerns personal information disclosure in helping relationships. When interacting with people a helper probably speaks about himself or herself whether he wants it or not, and some information may be rather personal. I think it is important to take into consideration this bias and control personal information when working with others. Keeping boundaries and not permitting personal relationships mix with professional will help to make these biases irrelevant. Read More