Infidelity a Byproduct of Marital Relationships - Research Paper Example

Infidelity – a Byproduct of Marital Relationships The topic of infidelity is one of the most frequently discussed in psychology, sociology, and sexuality studies. For many societies, infidelity stands out as the inevitable byproduct of marital relationships and as the critical component of the institution of marriage. Numerous theories and assumptions were developed, to explain what infidelity is, what effects it produces on individuals and their partners/ spouses, and what causes and encourages female and male infidelity. Evolutionary theory is one of the most popular explanations of infidelity. Today, however, the evolutionary vision of infidelity looks rather limited and requires additional research: in the postmodern reality, infidelity is no longer a purely extramarital sexual relationship but extends to cover a variety of forms, including emotional infidelity and infidelity in Cyber-space. INFIDELITY: THEORY AND ASSUMPTIONS Infidelity (also, adultery or extramarital sex) is fairly regarded as the most common form of affair or marital unfaithfulness in the present day society. Infidelity is usually defined and associated with a sexual contact outside the primary relationship or marriage. In distinction from open marriages, unfaithfulness presupposes contacts and sexual relationships that occur without the permission and, more importantly, the knowledge of the partner. In the study of the national sample in the U.S., Wiederman (1997) found out that 23% percent of men and 12% of women in relationships or marriage admit having sex with someone else during this relationship/ marriage. In numerical terms, tens of millions of people tend to have extramarital sex while having a permanent partner/ husband (Wiederman, 1997). Obviously, infidelity is a broad social trend and requires profound practical investigation. More often than not, infidelity is interpreted in terms of evolution: in women, infidelity is believed to have direct relation to ovulation and the menstrual cycle (Hassleton & Gangestad 2006). From the psychological viewpoint, infidelity is often a reflection of both sexual permissiveness and unhappiness in primary relationship or marriage (Reiss 1980). People engage in extramarital sex, looking for sexual satisfaction, coupled with permissiveness of sexual relationships and their search for personal happiness outside the primary relationship/ marriage. Infidelity implies the existence of both short-term and long-term extramarital relationships: short-term infidelity may result even from a brief encounter at an office meeting, whereas long-term infidelity exemplifies individual search for long-term satisfaction and happiness, which may be absent in marriage. Today, however, neither evolutionary theory nor the short-term/ long-term infidelity dichotomy can fully explain why women and men engage in adultery. Given the recent social and technological advancement, a distinction should be made between emotional and sexual infidelity. Infidelity extends to cover a broad range of relationships in cyberspace. Also, infidelity often stems from the growing and persistent gender inequality in society. INFIDELITY: THE CURRENT STATE OF LITERATURE The current state of literature supports the belief that infidelity can be both emotional and physical. In other words, for a man or a woman to be unfaithful does not necessarily mean to engage in a sexual intercourse with a person other than his/ her primary partner. More and more often, men and especially, women form emotional unions and relationships which do not transform into a sexual intercourse but serve an effective source of emotional satisfaction for both partners. According to Whitty and Quigley (2008), emotional infidelity means “falling in love with an individual other than one’s partner” (Whitty & Quigley 2008). Contrary to numerous beliefs, “spending time with a different partner without having sex with her/ him” is also considered as an act of infidelity (Whitty & Quigley 2008). More important, however, are the differences in female and male perceptions regarding emotional and sexual infidelity. Through the prism of the evolutionary theory, ancient men often faced the risks of cuckoldry and were increasingly uncertain about the paternity of their children – as a result, male sexual infidelity was an acute response to the discussed uncertainty (Whitty & Quigley 2008). In their turn, ancestral women held numerous fears about the man’s diverting his wishes and resources from her and her children – in this situation, they often became jealous toward possible emotional infidelity of their partners/ husbands (Whitty & Quigley 2008). As of today, the issue of emotional infidelity is becoming more acute, given the accessibility of online resources, which help people to meet in a cyberspace and develop a new form of non-sexual infidelity ties. Hackathorn (2009) supports the ideas provided by Whitty and Quigley (2008), saying that the Internet-mediated infidelity was the source of the growing distress and uncertainty for women, who are particularly susceptible to the risks of emotional infidelity on the male side. Taking into account that the growth of the World Wide Web facilitates the development of interpersonal relationships between men and women, the latter are likely to face the growing level of stress due to the availability of emotional satisfaction for male partners through the cyber-space (Hertlein & Piercy 2008). Another aspect of infidelity is in how it relates to gender inequality and coercion in partnerships. This aspect was omitted by the evolutionary theory but is extremely important for understanding the reasons and effects of extra-marital relations. The fact is in that male and female infidelity reveals the differences that are both complex and noteworthy. For men, infidelity is often an effective extension of their gender dominance in the marital relationship, the sign of the greater autonomy compared to female partners, and the product of sexual coercion and aggressiveness (Archer 2009; Goetz & Shackelford 2009; Smith 2010). Moreover, aggressiveness and coercion are both the drivers and effects of extramarital emotional and sexual relationships. The evolutionary explanations of infidelity are limited to biological and genetic mechanisms that are responsible for the development and formation of male-female relationships; however, the supporters of the evolutionary theory forget that male sexual dissatisfaction, lower positive communication, female and male invalidation in the primary relationship and the lack of emotional connections can be readily responsible for the rise in the number of infidelity cases in the postmodern society (Allen et al 2008). As of today, women are reported to be more unfaithful than men, while men are more likely to discover their female partners’ infidelity than women (Brand et al 2007). Obviously, the discussed data and findings are more or less directly related to the evolutionary theory of infidelity. This theory often serves the fundamental point in the research of the causes and drivers of infidelity among women and men. Researchers tend to explore the new and emerging forms of infidelity, including Internet infidelity, through the evolutionary theory lens. However, there is also the need for developing a new infidelity vision, which will embrace what has been found about infidelity so far. It is important that scientists have a better explanation of what emotional infidelity is, how it is developed, and what drivers stand behind the emotional infidelity ties. Another aspect of the recent infidelity studies is in discovering the frequency of infidelity among women and men: as of today, the majority of infidelity researches are based on self-reports, and that women are more likely to admit infidelity than men is a well-known fact (Brand et al 2007). As a result, there is a need for more objectivity and non-bias. Meanwhile, it is clear that infidelity will continue to be one of the dominant social trends all over the world, and technology is likely to contribute to the development of extramarital sexual and emotional ties between men and women beyond their primary partnership/ marriage. CONCLUSION The topic of infidelity is one of the most frequently discussed in sociology, psychology, and sexuality studies. It would be fair to assume, that infidelity has already become an essential element of the postmodern marital relationships. Evolutionary theory is often used to explain the causes and effects of extramarital relationships; however, it is at least incorrect to limit the notion of infidelity to evolutionary principles only. Today, a clear distinction should be made between emotional and sexual infidelity. Furthermore, the expansion of the World Wide Web contributes to and facilitates the development of interpersonal relationships with men and women other than one’s primary partner. Obviously, infidelity will continue to be one of the dominant social trends in the postmodern society, giving rise to the development of new, more sophisticated sociological and psychological theories of infidelity. References Allen, Elizabeth S., Rhoades, Galena Kline, Stanley, Scott M. Markman, Howard J., Williams, Tamara, Melton, Jessica & Clements, Maril L. 2008. “Premarital Precursors of Marital Infidelity.” Family Process 47(2): 243-59. Archer, John. 2009. “Does Sexual Selection Explain Human Sex Differences in Aggression?” Behavioral and Brain Sciences 32: 249-311. Brand, Rebecca J., Markey, Charlotte M., Mills, A. & Hodges, Sara D. 2007. “Sex Differences in Self-Reported Infidelity and Its Correlates.” Sex Roles 57: 101-9. Goetz, Aaron T. & Shackelford, Todd K. 2009. “Sexual Coercion in Intimate Relationships: A Comparative Analysis of the Efforts of Women’s Infidelity and Men’s Dominance and Control.” Arch Sex Behav 38: 226-34. Hackathorn, Jana. 2009. “Beyond Touching: Evolutionary Theory and Computer- Mediated Infidelity.” The New School Psychology Bulletin 6(1): 29-34. Hertlein, Katherine M. & Piercy, Fred P. 2008. “Therapists’ Assessment and Treatment of Internet Infidelity Cases.” Journal of Marital and Family Therapy 34(4): 481-97. Smith, Daniel Jordan. 2010. “Promiscuous Girls, Good Wives, and Cheating Husbands: Gender Inequality, Transitions to Marriage, and Infidelity in Southeastern Nigeria.” Anthropological Quarterly 83 (1): 123-52. Whitty, Monica T. & Quigley, Laura-Lee. 2008. “Emotional and Sexual Infidelity Offline and in Cyberspace.” Journal of Marital and Family Therapy 34(4): 461-68. Read More