Bullying Among Kids - Research Paper Example

Bullying among kids Bullying can be defined as the unwarranted aggressive behavior common among school going children. It can take the form of threats, coercion, or intimidation with an intention to cause harm. Kids who are victims of bullying often experience physical or emotional pain. The validation of the aggressive behavior of bullies is often due to difference in body size, gender, race, strength, or appearance. A bully can either be an individual or a group ganging against an individual they dislike. Mobbing is the term used to refer to group bullying. Kids who bully their counterparts are usually trying to project their frustration at their parent who perhaps may not have given them the attention they yearned. They tend to throw their weight around to attract the attention of their peers (Salmivalli 115). Statistics shows that four in every five kids have been bullied either in school or at home. However bullying is more common in schools than in any other place. In public schools, the vice has become a ritual for new kids carried out by older and bigger kids. Therefore, due to the prevalence of bullying in schools, this paper will explore this vice in greater details and examines the motives behind bullying among school going kids. Moreover, the paper will assess how bad parenting contributing to bullying among kids. Identifying Bullying Teasing is harmless when done in a playful manner, and both kids find it funny. However, when it becomes hurtful, repetitive, and unkind, it is referred to as bullying. According to Swearer (pg40, 2010), Bullying is the deliberate emotional, physical, or verbal abuse directed to a kid perceived to be weak or different. It often ranges from threats, extortion, scoffs to hitting. In today society, bullying has taken another form better known as cyber bullying. Cyber bullying involves spreading rumors or spiteful message about a person on the social media. However, this form of bullying is only common in teenagers and young adults who electronic messaging have become part of their daily life. The society should take bullying as a serious issue and not some ritual that toughen up the kids. The effects can be far-reaching and can have a devastating psychological effect on the kids. In extreme cases, bullying has led to misfortunes such as school shooting. Bullying only thrives in schools where the staff and administration are doing little to address it. Most public schools across the country lack policies that condemn bullying. Therefore, this probably explains it prevalence in these schools. Bullying is also common public schools due to student diversity by race, culture and gender. Kids from minority groups mostly suffer from bullying since they are seen as different and are perceived not to belong (Humphrey and Symes 87). These children suffer silently and are often dejected and head up performing poorly in their studies. Some of them may even drop out from school or worse still suffer psychologically. A section these kids harbors suicidal thoughts. This shows the seriousness the issue of bullying is and the harm it causes to vulnerable kids. Portrait of a Bully Bullying often results from a variety of sources, some of the sources include schools and homes. At home, older siblings torment or coerce their younger sibling to get what they want. A section of scholars argues that bullying may stem out from an undiagnosed psychological inability to learn social skills. Therefore, such children portray aggressive behaviors towards those they perceive weak (Cook 45). The absence of social skills among these kids is replaced with bullying. Other scholars have argued that bullies lack problem-solving skills and often find violence has an easy way to solve their issues. As children grow, they should be exploring ways of solving a problem in a manner that does not hurt those around them. For instance, they can learn to discern social situations, understand the surroundings and making new friends. Bullies usually replace these skills with violence and verbal abuse. So as a result, they do not learn problem-solving skills since they can coerce other kids. These children do not find the essence of working thing out amicably since they can push around their peers or abuse them. They do not find the need to get along with their classmates since controlling them is an option (Humphrey and Symes 90). They find intimidation and use of force more appealing and effective in solving their problems. Therefore, before they attain fifteen years, bullying is embedded, and become a voluntary response when they feel socially insecure. Most bullies are attention seekers; they thrive on the attention they get from their peers. They are often controlling and self-centered since they view themselves as idols to their victims. In high school, they usually engage in aggressive sports such as rugby or football (Salmivalli 116). They often believe that they are better than anyone else in very they do and more especially in sport. Most of them do not perform well in class as they are often distracted by other irrelevant issues. In elementary school, children who bully are often destructive and break things to feel powerful. When a bully feels weak or is in a socially awkward situation, they are likely to be more violent since that the only way they feel in control. What makes Children Bully? Many scholars believe that bullies are not born, they are raised. According to Sourander (pg 282, 2010), Bullying is a learned behavior that children develop as a way of dealing with issues affecting them. It is an attempt to acquire control over someone and feel powerful. As mentioned earlier, some of the common traits of bullies include undeveloped social skills, highly aggressive and lack compassion. Due to undeveloped social skills, bullies are highly paranoid and have a tendency of perceiving threats where there are none. They view their peers as hostile when they are the opposite. For instance, inadvertently colliding with a bully may result in a fight based on myopic judgment. As a result of the lack of empathy, bullies fail to comprehend others feelings and unable to decipher a scenario where others are empathetic. It is imperative to understand the primary reasons for bullying among kids some of which are discussed below. Salmivalli (pg115, 2010) attributes the behavior portrayed by bullies to tense parental relationships. Most bullies usually crave for attention from their peers and use fear and coercion to get away with anything. Most bullies did not receive parental attention and often felt neglected. They lack love and care from their parents who probably are highly competitive and demand a lot from their children. Most of these parents are bigots and discriminative by of sex, race, and accomplishment. They indoctrinate competitive behavior on their children and teach them to use whatever means to outshine others in all areas. Therefore, these children become aggressive and violent. Children raised by parents who are less strict are more likely to become bullies. Parents who do not hold their children accountable for their misdeeds encourage recklessness and irresponsibility among their children. Therefore, as the children grow up they often think they can get away with mischief. On the other hand, children who are brought up by strict parents tend to be submissive and compliant. Such children are often victimized by the bullies. Poor academic performance has been identified as one of the many reasons why some kids bully others. Children who struggle in class and feel they do not get the much-needed help head up losing hope and become rebellious. They are then frustrated and stressed and thus respond by being mean to their brighter counterparts. Most of these children often feel insecure while in any learning environment since they feel that they are being mocked due to their inadequacy. They, therefore, revenge by bullying their higher achieving peers who they perceive as a threat. To support this line of argument, Humphrey and Symes (pg90, 2010) provides an instance where a certain kid in a certain elementary school was beaten up by his classmate who felt humiliated during a class discussion. This happened in an English class at an elementary school in Chicago where one kid could not read a passage. Some of his classmates laughed at him for his inability. One of his classmates, much younger than him read the same passage fluently to the amazement of his classmates. During break time, the angered kid took out his frustration on the other kid and severely injured him to the point of being hospitalized. This is among the many cases of bullying that are common in public schools across the country. According to Swearer (45, 2010), children with self-esteem issues often bully others. They portray aggressive behaviors to mask their inner frustrations. Most of them lack self-confidence and often struggle to fit in among their peers they perceive superior to them. More often than not, this due to the constant ridicule they get from their parents or siblings. Parents who demand a lot from their children often do not appreciate their children efforts. To compensate, the children become violent and mean to their peers who they perceive weak emotionally or physically. To avoid raising bullies parents should learn to appreciate the efforts of their children in academics or sports. As a result, this helps to boost their self-esteem and to raise their morale. Children with high self-esteem have great social skills since they feel socially accepted. Usually, such children are rarely lonely and are often in the company of their peers. Swearer (pg46, 2010) stresses on the need of listening to children grievance as a way of enhancing their self-confidence. Children who feel that they are heard both by their parents and their older siblings are unlikely to harbor negative thoughts about themselves. Conclusion Based on the above discussion, children bullying is as a result of bad parenting. Parents play an integral in defining the behavior of their children. The argument that children are born bullies is gibberish and pure hogwash. Most studies have confirmed this as they attribute the aggressive behavior of bullies to bad parenting (Cook 68). Children who were bullied by their parents take up this behavior as they grow up. Therefore, by building a positive relationship with their children parent can avoid raising bullies. The aggressive behavior of bullies can persist in them even as they transition to adulthood. However, there are some bullies who mature up once they complete their studies. Those that remain bullies even in their adulthood are often in conflict with the law enforcers since it is a criminal offense to use violence to resolve personal issues. Work Cited Cook, Clayton R., et al. "Predictors of bullying and victimization in childhood and adolescence: A meta-analytic investigation." School Psychology Quarterly 25.2 (2010): 65. Humphrey, Neil, and Wendy Symes. "Perceptions of social support and experience of bullying among pupils with autistic spectrum disorders in mainstream secondary schools." European Journal of Special Needs Education 25.1 (2010): 77-91. Salmivalli, Christina. "Bullying and the peer group: A review." Aggression and violent behavior 15.2 (2010): 112-120. Sourander, Andre. "The association of suicide and bullying in childhood to young adulthood: a review of cross-sectional and longitudinal research findings." Canadian Journal of Psychiatry 55.5 (2010): 282. Swearer, Susan M., et al. "What can be done about school bullying? Linking research to educational practice." Educational Researcher 39.1 (2010): 38-47 Annotated Bibliography Humphrey, Neil, and Wendy Symes. "Perceptions of social support and experience of bullying among pupils with autistic spectrum disorders in mainstream secondary schools." European Journal of Special Needs Education 25.1 (2010): 77-91. Humphrey Neil and Wendy Symes are scholars of outstanding stature with great knowledge in psychology. Their publication bullying among children with autism disorder is comprehensive and exhaustive on issue pertaining to bullying in mainstream secondary school. The article is valuable to my research paper because it outlines the challenges that victims of bullying go through. I intend to use it to provide an objective view on how children with special needs are victimized by bullies. Salmivalli, Christina. "Bullying and the peer group: A review." Aggression and violent behavior 15.2 (2010): 112-120. Salmivallli is a distinguished writer and author with unparallel experience and acumen. This is to imply that her interests and areas of specialization are particularly relevant to the study of bullying in kids. The author employs flawless blend of art and research that will assure the readers best coverage of the aforementioned topic. This source focuses on the aggressive and violent behavior that bullies exhibit. A reader would notice the author bias towards the girl child by focusing solely on bullying among boys. However, this is a crucial source because it covers and outlines measure of avoiding child bullying. Swearer, Susan M., et al. "What can be done about school bullying? Linking research to educational practice." Educational Researcher 39.1 (2010): 38-47 Swearer Susan is a renowned writer and education researcher who has agitated for educational reforms in public schools with diverse student population. According to Susan there is an increasing concern of pupils being bullied in these public schools due to class diversity. This is a credible source since it highlights some of the measures of reducing bullying in public schools. The article provides an in-depth analysis on the effects of bullying particularly among members of minority groups in public schools. Read More