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The lack of self-esteem and poor physical self-image - Essay Example

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This essay explores the effects of self-esteem and physical attractiveness on romantic behavior. It is believed that once a strong sense of trust is developed between partners in a relationship it enables a person to view their partner's motivations, in addition to their own…
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The lack of self-esteem and poor physical self-image
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Download file to see previous pages This paper illustrates that the Family Law Manual defines irreconcilable differences as “..serious, permanent differences between the spouses that have led to a breakdown in the marriage." It implies a lack of cooperation and commitment in the partnership, as well as unwillingness to resolve the problem. In other words, many married couples are not getting along. Happy partners who are satisfied in their relationships are much less likely to divorce. However, the underlying cause of Irreconcilable differences is actually the lack of self-esteem on either one of the married couple. In psychology, self-esteem or self-worth refers to a person's subjective appraisal of himself or herself as intrinsically positive or negative to some degree. Self-esteem involves both self-relevant beliefs (e.g., "I am competent/incompetent", "I am liked/disliked") and associated self-relevant emotions (e.g., triumph/despair, pride/shame). It also finds expression in behavior (e.g., assertiveness/timorousness, confidence/caution). In addition, self-esteem can be construed as an enduring personality characteristic (trait self-esteem) or as a temporary psychological condition (state self-esteem). Finally, self-esteem can be specific to a particular dimension (e.g., "I believe I am a good writer, and feel proud of that in particular") or global in extent (e.g., "I believe I am a good person, and feel proud of myself in general"). ... This internalization becomes the conscience or controlling factor in the way that people perceive their performance, relationships, and a world in general. A person with low self-esteem will have difficulty sustaining a healthy romantic relationship because such relationship is based on interdependence and trust. The individual with low self-esteem, sad to say, are not dependable partners and cannot trust easily. Codependence and interdependence are two very different dynamics. Codependence is about giving away power over a person's self-esteem. Taking a person's self-definition and self-worth from outside or external sources is dysfunctional because it causes one to give power to how one feels about himself to people and forces which he cannot control. Trust is another important quality of a satisfactory relationship. Presumably, without trust in a close romantic relationship, there can be no security. Some studies showed the three main stages of trust: dependability, predictability, and faith. To have dependability in a partner is to be able to rely on and count on the partner in good times and in bad times. The predictability of a partner is based on experiences and knowledge of one's partner and how he or she will act in different situations. Finally, faith is most important because it assumes a level of risk; relying more on personal feelings about a partner helps the person move further into the relationship. ...Download file to see next pagesRead More
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