Domestic Violence and Intimate Terrorism - Essay Example

Module Module ID: Q The term family violence manifestly refers to the hostility and aggression demonstrated by one or more members against the others. In other words, family violence is inflicted by the husband, father, brother, stepparents and dominating children upon the weak relations at domestic level. However, in most of the cases, the complaints are made and registered against stepfathers and husbands committing family violence upon the stepchildren and wives respectively. The reasons behind the stepchildren and wives for becoming the victim of such violent behavior and antagonism includes their being physically and financially weak, which stops them from defending themselves as well as from taking revenge from the strong member of the family. Thus, the principle of might is right appears to be in vogue not only at national and international scale, but also the same tradition is frequently observed at society, community and domestic levels as well, where every big fish is determined to devour the smaller one in one way or the other. Moreover, intimate terrorism aims to describe the violence exercised by the spouses or partners upon one another; physical and sexual exploitation of the spouse and emotional blackmailing of the partner also come under the definition of intimate terrorism. Thus, intimate terrorism is practiced by the individuals against lover, partner or spouse, i.e. within the marital relationship or close physical and/or sexual intimacy. Both family violence and intimate terrorism are condemnable acts, which not only cause the emotional and sentimental murder of the victim, but also pave the way towards the end of the love and even relationship between the couple in their wake. Q 2: Marital rape simply stands for having sex with the spouse without seeking her/his consent, and hence is performed against the free will of the spouse. Since male physically play the dominant role in the sexual activity; it is therefore, females or wives are generally the victims of marital rape or sexual abuse at the hands of their husbands. However, sometimes, husbands also have to perform sex on their wives on the threats from the latter, which also comes under the definition of rape. Marital sex includes both vaginal and anal sexual penetration, either or both of which are conducted against the wishes of the partner uninterested to get involved into the same. Sexual abuse of the wife not only physically hurts the victim, but also ruins her mentally and psychologically; consequently, she finds herself unsafe and unprotected not only outside her home, but this bitter reality destroys her mentally that she is quite insecure within the four walls of her home. Similarly, dating violence refers to committing of physical, mental or sexual assault on the lover, beloved or partner one is dating beyond the marital-knot, where either the lovers or partners could either be unmarried or married, though not with one another. In this case, violence is not confined to sexual harassment of the partner; on the other hand, physical victimization and even financial exploitation are also included in dating violence. The lovers/partners could be dating each other while practicing intimacy and sexual encounters too, though it is not necessary in this case. Q 3: The men inflicting physical torture upon their wives are called to be involved into wife battering, which is viewed to be one of the worst forms of domestic violence. It has aptly been observed that husbands and wives get involved into abusive language and physical assaults even during their quarrels with each other, and would whip and beat each other with stick, rod and knife, causing wounds and injuries on the bodies oft heir spouse subsequently. However, men being superior in physique are in a position to overcome their wives and partners and could batter them brutally during the quarrel or any other matter that appears to be unpleasant to them and against their will as well. The husbands battering their wives and applying violence against them are looked down upon by an overwhelming majority of every social establishment, and human rights organizations vehemently condemn the same by suggesting punishments for the husbands practicing wife battering and exercising domestic violence on delicate sex subsequently. However, the husbands take the plea that their wives hurt them by taunting, jeering and insulting words, which invite their anger, and force them stop the same by beating their wives. There are so many ways application of which could eradicate and at least mitigate wife battering. First of all, both the spouses should observe tolerance and endurance, and should respect the wishes and desires of others. Secondly, they should never reach at the point, which could invite violence in its wake. Moreover, they should consult family counselors and psychiatrists in order to create harmony between the two, as creating of a pleasant and peaceful domestic environment ensures a peaceful society, while lack of love and trusts between the spouses brings frustration in society at large. Q 4: Divorce is the formal and legal termination of matrimonial relationship between the spouses, which brings the rights and obligations of the couple had been created after their entering into civil contract of marriage. It generally takes place at the eve when the couple appears to be standing at the point of no return, and does not intend any compromise altogether. As a result, a home breaks and ceases to end, turning the spouses as strangers, while leaving the children at a sorry state of affairs for the future years to come. There are several reasons behind such ruination of domestic life; one of the most astounding reasons behind divorce includes absence of patience and tolerance between one or both the spouses, which do not get ready to submit to the other for the sake of home and children. Second important reason behind divorce is incompatible marriages, which are usually arranged either by the elders in eastern societies or are the outcome of sudden feelings of liking or provocation, which generally end in divorce. Thirdly, betrayal on the part of one or both partners and entering into extra marital relationship also results in divorce ultimately. Fourthly, marriage between the members of divergent ethno-racial, religious or cultural groups also turn out to be futile and fruitless, where the couples prefer to get separated instead of sticking to a relation which lacks love. Intolerable disposition of the spouse also brings unhappy end to marriage. In addition, financial instability, cultural differences, and the wife’s being infertile may also lead to the termination of marriage. The Indian husbands also divorce their brides on not bringing dowry luggage with them at the eve of marriage. Harsh attitude of spouse and immorality exercised by them beyond marital knot also causes divorce. Male erectile dysfunction (med) and other psychological problems also play their roles as major factors behind divorce. Q 5: Although divorce is regarded to be one of the most unpleasant and awkward social phenomena, yet it occurs in all societies of the globe without discrimination. Somehow, the proportion of divorce is far higher in western societies than in eastern cultures due to the very reality that marriages in the eastern societies are still arranged and decided by the elders, while the western societies give free hand to the individuals for choosing the spouse of his/her choice. Both men and women select their life partners with great enthusiasm, and do not intend to leave each other at the eve of marriage. Nevertheless, circumstances take such a drastic turn that the couple feels divorce better than living with a person that contains no qualities that could bind the couple forever. The couple had got chance of learning many things from divorce; one of the most significant things to be learnt from divorce includes patience, endurance and compromise while selecting the mate and leading life with him/her subsequently. In addition, divorce also teaches women that home is the most important thing and place in their life, and they should try their best to choose the best companion in order to lead a tranquil and peaceful domestic life full of joys and delights. Consequently, the individuals get acquainted with the very reality that mutual love, understanding and care are vital things, while sexual attraction and pleasures are secondary ones in a strong relationship. The couple learns how they could dedicate them to the happiness of the partner by taking care of the spouse and providing him/her every possible comfort out of their available resources. Q 6: Divorce mediation is the settling of terms and conditions of divorce between the couple intended to divorce each other in the wake of deciding that the spouses are not in a position to stay together as life partners anymore. Since the husband and wife are not in good terms, and do not want to make any compromise on major issues, they are unable to settle other matters too by their own. Consequently, they seek the support of some mediator in order to reach any conclusion in respect of deciding the terms and conditions of divorce, so that they could escape any further unpleasantness already created in their domestic life. The primary goal behind seeking mediation in divorce includes the division of financial assets, compensation settled at the eve of marriage and determining the future of children after the breaking of home. Since children are the worst sufferers of the separation between their parents, it is the most imperative obligation of the mediator that he should make sure that he has made best possible decision in respect of the brought up, nutrition, education and supervision of the innocent children after the divorce between their biological parents. Moreover, the mediator should not impose all burdens on one party; rather, he/she should divide assets, rights and duties to both the ex spouses, which include emotional and financial support to children, expenditures of ex wife as per decided at the eve of marriage and others. The mediator should make clear to the ex couple that they would never disclose the secrets they had come to know during their marital relationship. Hence, an experienced, expert and wise mediator can settle the disputed issues between the couple in an amicable manner. Q 7: It has aptly been stated that the children are the worst victims of divorce between their real parents. On the one side, they are deprived of the natural love and affection of at least one parent, and on the other side they feel themselves quite unprotected and insecure, where they are to face the scorching heat of the untoward situations the children of broken homes undergo. Since the children are delicate flowers of nature, they are unable to know the realities of life, and aptly enquire about the absence of one of their parents, and major reasons behind such deprivation they experience. One of the most devastating challenges the children from broken homes face is the emotional vacuum in their personality. Since biological parents shower their love on the children, the children of single-parent home undergo great depression and despair, and their confidence shatters to such a great extent that they cannot come out of the same throughout their life span. Furthermore, the children from divorced families have higher proportion of becoming the prey to sexual assaults at the hands of the family friends, stepparents, neighbors, teachers and strangers due to the very reality that they are thought to be unattended adolescents, assaults on which would not be persecuted very effectively. The statistics reveal that the children who had lost either or both of their parent(s) cannot cope with the difficulties of life as a balanced personality, and there remain flaws in their socialization process, which is almost impossible to overcome with. Consequently, their achievements appear to be far lesser than their competitors, and they remain in the constant fear of being attacked from different corners. Q 8: Step-parents serve as the spouse of one of the biological parents of the children, which are mistakenly regarded to be the biological parents of the children from broken homes. However, it is quite impossible for the stepparents to love the child of their spouse in the same manner they tend to love their real children. There is no such mystery behind the same due to the fact that their biological children are their own product, which not only belong to them, but also take after them in appearance, mental compatibility and approach as well. On the contrary, the stepchildren are strangers, which just share the same house and environment, and hence are considered to be an unpleasant burden on the back of the stepparent. Theorists define various stages of relationships that come in the life of the individuals and their step relations. The first stage is viewed to be the fantasy stage, where both the stepparent(s) and stepchildren fantasize about meeting new relations as integral part of their future life. The idea of having fun with the young ones excites the stepparent, while the stepchildren think of obtaining security and love under the supervision of the spouse of their parent. The first stage ends with the mixing up with new relations, and making adjustments with them with high expectations. Hence, the second or immersion stage, where the relations between the step members of family are excellent ones, and both the sides appear to be ready to oblige each other in an extremely fascinating manner. The third stage is regarded to be the awareness stage during which the stepchildren realize that the husband or wife of their mother or father does not have any concern with them, and they have to live with him/her just because of their marriage with their parent; the same is the case with the stepparents. It is really a shocking stage, where the dreams start shattering and people getting disappointed subsequently. The fourth stage of mobilization determines new roles and responsibilities for the step relations, where everyone has to perform one thing or the other. Both the parties openly express their differences, and announce the real nature of their relationship, which could never bring natural affection for each other. The action stage is regarded as the final stage of relationship between the step relations, where the stepchildren could become the victim of physical, mental, psychological and even sexual assaults of the stepparents, which ignite deep feelings of hatred and abhorrence in the minds of the children, which adopt different way for revenge and retaliation of cruelties and violence being exercised on them at domestic level. Read More