Explaining a Concept of Marriage - Essay Example

Explaining the concept of marriage Marriage was once a successful that was between a man and a woman, but the concept of globalization and feminism has changed it in totality. Marriage requires that those involved treat each other as equal partners in the union, but this has changed because some women have felt as though the traditional roles attached to them are oppressing. Divorce has become rampant because many couples fail to agree on what their responsibilities should be while others site career choices as a major contributor to failing marriages. According to Plunkett from The Richest, the USA is ranked 10th globally among the nations with the highest divorce rates at 53% with Belgium being at the top of the list with 71%. Over the years, marriage has shifted from being a union between a man and a woman to include same sex marriages that have also had their fare share of success and failures. With this, this essay will delve into the factors that contribute towards a successful marriage or the failure of the same by pointing out the issues that influence both of these occurrences. Narration Once, I was at the airport and I witnessed a sight that made me believe that marriage works and that men can truly be loving to their wives. I was in my usual travels one day when I saw a couple that expressed love to each other as though they were in their honeymoon phase, but still it was beautiful. I decided to wait and see how the scene would unravel as much as I was in a hurry, but who does not like admiring a romantic scene. The husband seemed to have been on a trip that had lasted for several weeks and his wife and two had come to the airport to receive him and take him home. How he greeted his family warmed my heart as he first leaned towards his kids and hugged them tightly while whispering some words that made the kids smile. Then he finally turned to his wife who was looking on keenly with a warm smile on her face as the man suggested that he had saved the best for last, which meant that hugging his wife last was powerful to him. The kiss they shared was quite passionate, which suggested how deep their love was. It was quite clear that this family was a unit and that the marriage of these two was working based on the conversation they shared about how the wife had been for all the while that the husband was away. I could not help myself and so I had to inquire from the couple how long they had been together and the husband said that they had been together for a decade and a half. The amazing this was that this marriage still had the passion and surprisingly the husband had only been away for two days, which seemed like an eternity to the family. Seeing this, I asked the couple what their secret for being such great lovers after all those years and the answer they gave me took me aback. They said that they decided together to make their marriage work and that both of them had put in equal efforts into making their marriage healthy. This was part of the reason why when the husband was away, the wife felt as though her life partner had been away for a longer period. Therefore, the lack of connection and understanding between couples has a hand in the current rise of divorce cases. Compara/contrast Notably, there has been a high increase in the number of divorces across the globe either because couples fail to see eye to eye on certain things or simply because they are bored with their partners (Lehman 280). For those that marriage has worked for them, they agree that it requires constant working on, compromise and time invested in it in order for it work. Marriage partners should treat each other as equal investors in their union so that party does not feel as though they are investing too much while their partner does not meet them half way. Marriages that fail tend to draw from the fact that the spouses feel neglected or when of the spouses is selfish and does not share their time or resources with their partners. On the other hand, a marriage that works is one that each of the spouses views each other as a friend, companion, and confidant. Many say that if one cannot find a best friend in their spouse, then what use is it being in the relationship in the first place. Respect is also a key component when it comes to the institution of marriage because without this then there is likely to be a conflict that may lead to the failure of the marriage. This can be better illustrated by an example provided below. Example In order for any marriage to withstand the test of time, conflicts and arguments are unavoidable because how coupes solve their marriages helps in strengthening their commitment to another (Lehman 7). However, some wives may present their grievances to their partners in a way that that the partners feel as though they are being ridiculed meaning that how people choose to present their grievance matters a lot. Men on the other hand, are known to be ignorant beings either when they choose to, because they feel that their wives are nagging or simply because they choose not to cooperate with the demands of their wives. It is not be possible to change a person by ridiculing them because doing so does not help either as people can only change if they choose to and cannot be forced to become individuals that they do not want to be. Based on this, marriage should be founded on respect that in turn influences understanding between couples. Vivid description Marriage should be for people that understand each other and understand the type of commitment that they are making towards each other hence should not be jumped into. People should not be forced by their age or the society to get into marriage if they feel that they are not ready for such a commitment because it should be a lifetime. For those that get into marriage for all the right reasons, they enjoy companionship with the people that they chose to be their lifetime companions because of the trust that they have in them. Therefore, marriage should have trust as its core foundation, then other things such as friendship, love, and respect among a list of other elements follow. The absence of these elements is what causes fall out of couples in marriages leading to divorce. Cause and effects Surprisingly, the idea of ‘happily ever after only exists in fairy tales’ because marriages have been shaken due to infidelity, lack of commitment, and poor communication between spouses that later leads to divorce. Further, marriages also end because spouses no longer share beliefs, expectations, values and the passion that once existed at some point in their relationship. Poor communication between spouses is the greatest contributor to divorce because this leads to poor decision making that leads to conflict within a marriage (Lehman 254). This can also lead to financial problems, especially when there are children involved because they tend to make this to be a very sensitive issue. On the contrary, talking can help in solving most of the challenges that married couples could be facing as this can minimize the chances of marriages resulting in divorce. However, failed marriages are known for affecting the lives of the children involved meaning that the consequences attached to this decision can be dire (Lehman 281). Additionally, marriages can only succeed when there is respect between couples, and when there is understanding, which is an advantage to the family unit as a whole. When couples apply these factors then the chances of divorce would be low and the rate successful marriages would go up especially in the nations ranked high in divorce rates such as Belgium. Work cited Lehman, Jerry D. Understanding Marriage, Family, and Intimate Relationships. Springfield, Ill: Charles C Thomas, 2005. Print. Plunkett, Mary. “World’s 10 most divorced nations.” The Richest. 1 May 2014. Web. 23 Feb. 2015. Read More