Self-Disclosure, Gender, and Communication - Essay Example

and number Self-Disclosure, Gender and Communication submitted Self-Disclosure, Gender and Communication The article written by Schoenberg (2011) entitled “Can we talk? Researcher talks about the role of communication in marriages” and published in the Houston Chronicle presented issues pertinent to the crucial role of communication in marriages. The author cited the findings of Terri Orbuch, “ a research scientist at the Institute for Social Research at the University of Michigan who has studied 373 married couples for more than 20 years” (Schoenberg, 2011), as indicating that the consistency and quality of communication are more relevant in long term successful marriages.

By divulging inner feelings, fears and preferences through daily quality sharing of information, Orbuch emphasized that long term romantic relationships are enforced. I definitely agree to the points contended giving support to the self-disclosure as instrumental in revealing new and exciting information that could prolong the interest and enthusiasm in a married couples’ relationship. I believe that in any interpersonal relationship, for that matter, the value of new information in diverse subjects provides the impetus for sustained interest in the relationship.

The ability to pay attention to one’s partner is crucial and is enriched through quality communication that was suggested to be continually nurtured through time. I can definitely relate to the article on self-disclosure in relationships, especially on the portion which explains that self-disclosure actually manifests a “sharing (of) your private feelings, fears, doubts and perceptions with your partner” (Schoenberg, 2011, p. 7). By revealing intimate feelings, emotions, preferences with one’s partner, a portion of oneself is virtually exposed and it is as if one is committing oneself by confiding private matters that only the lifelong partner is expected to know.

It creates a strong bond linking two married couples together. In this regard, I agree that self-disclose is important and directly related to satisfaction in relationship because, as abovementioned, the ability to confide to one’s partner requires trust and commitment and a deep understanding that whatever deep secrets are divulged would not be relayed to others. In terms of gender differences, the discourse mentioned that “men tend to favor gestures of affirmation over words, Orbuch says.

Women tend to go with verbal affirmation” (Schoenberg, 2011, p. 7). The article also revealed that men tend to exemplify a need for more affective affirmation than women. In one’s personal experience, I think I would agree to the arguments and validated by friends’ experiences that were shared to me that women need to reinforce feelings of love through verbalization; men want physical expression, more than verbal communication, in contrast. It is a matter of disposition and preference. The generalizations regarding gender and affective affirmation fit my personal preference.

But of course, expression of love takes both verbal and nonverbal modes of communication. A combination of the two always helps in reinforcing positive feelings and emotions that attest to the strong sharing of thoughts, preferences, secrets, sweet-nothings, and other valuable experiences that are exchanged through points in time and help build stronger bonds that unite couples together. Reference Schoenberg, N. (2011, February 6). Can we talk? Researcher talks about the role of communication in marriages.

Houston Chronicle , p. 7.