The Parental Love and Care - Essay Example

The effects of domestic violence I was about six years old when I first realized Mum and Dad were fighting', Mullender et al (2002). What does current research and practice say about the effects of domestic violence on the child, responses of social work professionals to domestic violence and the stresses domestic violence can place on a young child's development Order#: 197277 Deadline: 2007-12-13 19:45 Style: Harvard Language Style: English UK Pages: 10 Sources: 10 Writer ID: 6746 INTRODUCTION The first and foremost thing a child experiences in his promissory life is the parental love and care. When we deprive them of this birthright especially because of the unhealthy relationship of their parents may result into an incurable traumatic affliction. The infant and young children grow at the laps of the foster mothers the so-called nannies experience the world in a different revelation. It is like feeding the baby with container milk instead of mother's breast, whatever is the reason. Studies showed that the role of the parents is more significant than first thought as we moved into the concept of primary caregiver. In a study published in Child Development May/June 2003, Volume 74, Number 3, Pages 801-821, Bruce J. Ellis, et al, found that presence of the natural father was the most significant factor in reducing rates of early sexual activity and rates of teenage pregnancy in girls. Covariate factors used included early conduct problems, maternal age at first childbirth, race, maternal education, father's occupational status, family living standards, family life stress, early mother-child interaction, measures of psychosocial adjustment and educational achievement, school qualifications, mood disorder, anxiety disorder, suicide attempts, violent offending, and conduct disorder. Therefore, we must agree that love massively matters in the formative growth of a normal child. If we cannot bestow this incredible value on them, they are bound to lead an abnormal life. In case of unexpected circumstances, there lies the role of social workers and state legislations to ensure a life worth to live. Why Love Matters of Sue Gerhardt stirs our emotional moral responsibilities for those who are involved in the care of children, from expecting mothers through to policy makers. Distilling the current science into easy-to-understand prose, Sue Gerhardt has provided a founding text for the future health of modern society. It explains that love is essential to brain development in the early years of life, particularly to the development of our social and emotional brain systems, and presents the startling discoveries that provide the answers to how our emotional lives work. The earliest relationship shapes the baby's nervous system, with lasting consequences and our adult life has earlier influence since infancy stage. The development of the brain can affect future emotional well being, and goes on to look at specific early 'pathways' that can affect the way we respond to stress and lead to conditions such as anorexia, addiction, and anti-social behavior. Mother's love is therefore mysteriously magical while father's love involves the nurturing passion for the baby along with the other family members and happy surroundings. While focusing all the goodness of relationship we nevertheless come across domestic violence in a male dominance society. Domestic violence, men's abusive power and control over women in intimate relationships, is a widespread but still largely hidden problem. Rethinking Domestic Violence explodes the myths concerning its nature, causes, and explores how the responses of social workers and probation officers to the women, children and men involved need to be far better co-coordinated and more effective. Women experiencing violence and abuse actually are in need of social work setting but, to date, their needs have largely been ignored. Their unhappy relationship quite often breed ancillary problems bring devastation to ruin all sorts of peace. This book looks at men's violence to women as a worldwide phenomenon, known in all cultures and through all ages. Traditionally dismissed as a man's right, as part of what women must endure in marriage, as the result of the man's drinking or as an occasional aberration in men who are psychologically ill, domestic violence has only recently been accepted as a criminal behavior that must not be tolerated by a civilized society. Social work often hooks in its bait not only into all the myths listed above but into another kind of unhelpful 'explanation' that violence was part of the dynamics of a relationship. The opportunities and challenges, in every context of social work and probation practice and policy making, to meet the needs of abused women and their children and to confront abusive men. In some areas of work, such as child protection and group work with male perpetrators, domestic violence recognizes major contemporary issues in order to solve them amicably. This recognition urgently needs to spread to all areas of work - community care; mainstream probation practice; the whole of child care; duty linked responses to women with emergency needs; hospitals, day centers and family centers - everywhere where women may seek help. THE HORRIFIED EFFECTS OF CHILD ABUSE Speaking philosophically, the only goal of life is to be happy. Moreover, there is only one happiness in life: to love and be loved. Ideal parents feel being loved when they love their offspring. Although, love is essentially an abstract concept much easier to experience than to explain that describes an intense feeling of affection, an emotion or an emotional state. In ordinary use, unconditional love usually refers to interpersonal affection derived from different mode of human relationship. One of the most happiness-rendering sources of happiness is rearing children. Probably due to its psychological relevance, love is one of the most common themes in art and music as prominent as parental relationship. On the other hand, the powerful tool of happiness indulge in cruel practices that we condemn as domestic violence especially when children become victims of circumstances. Child abuse can have dire consequences, during both childhood and adulthood. If the family or school environment is nurturing and supportive, the child will probably have a healthier outcome. The U.S. National Adoption Center found that 52% of adoptable children freed for adoption had symptoms of attachment disorder. Children with histories of maltreatment, such as physical and psychological neglect and physical abuse are at risk of developing psychiatric problems. Such children are at risk of developing a disorganized attachment. Disorganized attachment is associated with a number of developmental problems, including dissociate symptoms, as well as anxiety, depressive, and acting-out symptoms. A study by Dante Cicchetti found that 80% of abused and maltreated infants exhibited symptoms of disorganized attachment. It primarily spoils all the essence of emotional significance. Such motional effects include low self-esteem, depression and anxiety, eating disorders, relationship difficulties, alienation and withdrawal, and personality disorders. At time, some physical effects appear to be more prominent that include injury, death, lifelong health problems, cognitive difficulties, and physical disabilities. It also reflect on behavioral effects having problems in school and work, delinquency, teen pregnancy, suicide attempts, criminal or antisocial behavior, substance abuse, aggressive behavior and anger. HISTORY DENIES NEGLIGENCE TO KIDS No civilization has any record that encouraged hatred or negligence towards their kids. The superstitions such as female infanticides or children suffering from isolation due to their parental separation or death were in fact under consideration as the utter need of rehabilitations. Instead, their love was sometimes so extreme that their relationship with their offspring reached to an extreme point, symbolic to incomparable attribution of love instincts called Oedipus complex in psychology. The Oedipus complex in Freudian psychoanalysis refers to a stage of psychosexual development in childhood where children of both sexes regard their father as an adversary and competitor for the exclusive love of their mother. The name derives from the Greek myth of Oedipus, who unknowingly kills his father, Laius, and marries his mother, Jocasta. On the other hand as stated in Jungian thought, the Oedipus complex tends to refer only to the experience of male children, with female children experiencing an Electra complex in which they regard their mothers as competitor for the exclusive love of their fathers. Doubtlessly, it is truly a matter of concern why we do not love our innocent kids and indulge in unwanted malpractices whereas history have taught us only to be compassionate to them instead of creating violence. Nevertheless, the modern society stands in the reverse side of the previously mentioned values. There goes a chain of maltreatments. When it comes to domestic violence towards children involving physical abuse, research in the UK by the NSPCC indicated that most violence occurred at home 40- 60% of men and women who abuse other men or women abuse their children. Girls whose fathers batter their mothers are 6.5 times more likely to be sexually abused by their fathers than are girls from non-violent homes. It is evident that abusiveness is a psychological condition where social workers must intervene in, state policies discourage them by means of law and society must support them with moral implications. CHILDREN DESERVE OUR LOVE: OR ELSE IT MAY RESULT INTO THEIR TRAUMATIC EXISTENCE When children go to preschool, they broaden their social horizons while engaging themselves with those around them. Impulses are channeled into fantasies, which leaves the task of the caretaker to balance eagerness for pursuing adventure, creativity and self-expression with the development of responsibility. If caretakers are properly encouraging with consistent disciplinary programmes, children are more likely to develop positive self-esteem. While given more responsibility, more care and more opportunities they tend to show interest in knowledge, skills development and value building through their assigned activities. During childhood stage, intelligence is demonstrated through logical and systematic manipulation of symbols related to concrete objects. Operational thinking develops which means actions are reversible, and egocentric thought diminishes. Children go through the transition process from the world at home to that of school and peers. They learn to make things, use tools, and acquire the skills to be a worker and a potential provider. If children can discover pleasure in intellectual stimulation, being productive, seeking success, they will develop a sense of competence. If they are not successful or cannot discover pleasure in the process, they may develop a sense of inferiority and feelings of inadequacy that may haunt them throughout life. Then arrives the crucial period called adolescence. It is the period known for the formation of personal and social identity and the discovery of moral purpose. Intelligence is demonstrated through the logical use of symbols related to abstract concepts and formal reasoning. A return to egocentric thought often occurs early in the period. Only 35% develop the capacity to reason formally during adolescence or adulthood. (Huitt, W. and Hummel, J. January 1998). After a traumatic experience, a person may re-experience the trauma mentally and physically, hence avoiding trauma reminders, as this can be uncomfortable and even painful. They may turn to alcohol or drugs to try to escape the feelings. Re-experiencing symptoms are a sign that the body and mind are actively struggling to cope with the traumatic experience. Emotional triggers and cues act as reminders of the trauma and can cause anxiety and other associated emotions. In many cases, this may lead a person suffering from traumatic disorders to engage in disruptive or self-destructive coping mechanisms, often without being fully aware of the nature or causes of their own actions. Panic attacks are an example of a psychosomatic response to such emotional triggers. Consequently, intense feelings of anger may surface frequently, sometimes in very inappropriate or unexpected situations, as danger may always seem to be present. Upsetting memories such as images, thoughts, or flashbacks may haunt the person, and nightmares may be frequent. Insomnia may occur as lurking fears and insecurity keep the person vigilant and on the lookout for danger, both day and night. Some traumatized children may feel permanently damaged when trauma symptoms do not go away and they do not believe their situation will improve. This can lead to feelings of despair, loss of self-esteem, and frequently depression. If important aspects of the person's self and world understanding have been violated, the person may call their own identity into question. On November 19, 1997, President Bill Clinton signed a new foster care law 'The Adoption and Safe Families Act 1997', written and chaired by First Lady of the United States Hillary Rodham Clinton which reduced the time children are allowed to remain in foster care before being available for adoption. The new law requires state child welfare agencies to identify cases where aggravated circumstances make permanent separation of child from biological family. The best option for the safety and well-being of the child this law meets the objectives. One of the main components of The Adoption and Safe Families Act (ASFA) is the imposition of time limits on reunification efforts. In the past, it was common for children to languish in care for years with no permanent living situation identified. Similarly in Canada, a child may become a Crown Ward and be placed under the care of the provincial government, usually through a local or regional agency known as the Children's Aid Society. If the Crown does terminate the parent's rights, then the child will remain a permanent Crown Ward until they reach eighteen years of age. Crown Wards are able to apply for Extended Care through a Society, which enables them to receive financial services from the provincial government as long as they remain in school or employed until they are up to twenty-five years of age. However, orphanage or baby care, or juvenile rehabilitation center or any care giving house under the roof of philanthropic services is not the answer to the present problem originated in the crisis of love. Remarkably, a study by Dante Cicchetti found that 80% of abused and maltreated infants in his study exhibited symptoms of disorganized attachment. Children with histories of maltreatment, such as physical and psychological neglect, physical abuse, and sexual abuse, are at risk of developing psychiatric problems. These children may be described as experiencing trauma as the result of abuse or neglect, inflicted by a primary caregiver, which disrupts the normal development of secure attachment. The effects of early chronic maltreatment are seen in various domains that may require a multi-modal approach that directly addresses the underlying causative trauma and which seeks to build healthy and secure relationships with permanent caregivers. These children may require specialized treatment considering their situations without any prejudices. CONCLUSION: A NEED TO WORK HAND IN HAND According to Audrey Mullender, University of Warwick, Children who live with domestic violence typically know it is happening. We consider them likely to be affected by the fear, distress and disruption to their lives, even when they are not directly abused themselves, in ways that depend upon developmental stage, personality and individual circumstances. In the opinion of accomplished health workers, the need for effective inter-agency cooperation between domestic violence work and child protection work, and research indicates that helping women to be safe is also likely to constitute good child protection practice. We clearly know about what living with domestic violence is like for children. there are convincing arguments for mainstreaming the service responses in order to help mothers keep children safe, challenge perpetrators to be non-violent partners and parents, work with children to overcome negative experiences; and influence the next generation to regard violence as wrong and themselves as able to work on ending it. As a way out to the problems, local communities can also be involved, with, for example, a 'youth strategy' forming part of wider public education. Every service or packages that deal with domestic violence need to think about the impact on children. Specifically child focused inter-agency work could be co-coordinated through Area Child Protection Committees, groupings of organizations which come together to draw up children's services plans, and children's subcommittees of domestic violence. Further, a shift towards family support work could open up new opportunities for working with non-abusing parents. As a tertiary prevention, direct work with children can be offered through group work and one-to-one work, including counseling. Notably, some projects have been established by the major UK children's charities, while more comprehensive, positively evaluated models in parts of the US and Canada can offer useful lessons. It is mandatory for the hands that work to bring smiles to the victims of domestic violence to have adequate skills besides a strong sense of love. All agencies need training on how staff can work more constructively with survivors of domestic violence and their children. Rather than designing strategies on how to cope up with the aftermath of domestic violence, we need to understand the root cause of the occurrences and help them to be the part of the mainstream existence. . REFERENCES 1. Gauthier, L., Stollak, G., Messe, L., & Arnoff, J. (1996). 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