Differences Of Gender Communication - Research Paper Example

? Differences of Gender Communication Communication is the means through which ideas and information are conveyed from one person toanother. People use communication to express feelings, emotions, views and values, for learning and teaching, and for improving their status (Barret & Davidson, 2006). Therefore, communication is essential to human interaction, be it between husbands and wives, parents and children, or bosses and employees. The diversity and traits of those engaged in any interaction are thus capable of affecting communication, considering that any diversity in interaction is essential in achieving effective communication (Barret & Davidson, 2006). All races, societies, cultures and civilizations in this world have two things in common, i.e. the presence of men and women and the necessity of communication between them (Barret & Davidson, 2006). The issue of gender differences seems to have engaged the curiosity of people from time immemorial as people have been putting into writing their thoughts about the issue since the creation of Adam and Eve (Barret & Davidson, 2006). The claim that men and women communicate in distinctive ways, concerning distinctive things, and for distinctive reasons appears to go unargued. There are a number of incidents that tend to reaffirm the conviction that men and women communicate in distinctive ways, with the majority of leading communication scholars sharing this perception of gender and communication (Crawford, 1995). Research shows that women use conversation mainly to establish and support intimacy, while, on the other hand, men use communication to gain status. Apparently, these styles of and motives for communication signify different cultural backgrounds; at that, it does not mean that one is better than the other (Crawford, 1995). Nonetheless, men have a tendency of interrupting more and asking questions less as compared to women. The most evident distinctions in communication amongst men and women comprise of listening, as well as verbal and non-verbal communication. The most dominant difference between men and women is in the sphere of listening (Crawford, 1995). Apparently, women have a tendency of listening to each and every spoken word while, on the other hand, men listen only to the key points. However, women get credit not only for being active listeners but also for responding to anything that they need to say; this is due to the fact that they react in a positive manner to this as compared to men. Women demonstrate attentiveness by means of verbal and non-verbal signs while men tend to avoid these cues that keep on appearing from time to time. The majority of men fail in listening to every single word in a dialogue (Crawford, 1995); for instance, when speaking to a man, it is probable for a man to be a dynamic listener, yet when the conversation comes to an end, the same man may ask the name of the person. This is remarkable, considering that the person talking had clearly mentioned his name in the beginning of their conversation. It is even possible for the man to ask once again for the name of the speaker in the conversation; this is a clear indication that this man had been a discriminatory listener, so he forgot the name of the person speaking (Crawford, 1995). Apparently, this happens to be the main distinction between men and women. The second subject at hand happens to be verbal communication; research shows that while men tend to seek status in a conversation, women, on the other hand, seek acceptance (Barret & Davidson, 2006). This statement is obviously true when a man engages in a conversation with a woman; while men tend to speak about their careers, their achievements, and their future, women tend to discuss issues that have a direct or indirect relation to men. Men have a tendency of telling more stories and jokes as compared to women, considering that telling jokes happens to be a masculine way of negotiating a status. In most of those stories told by men, they almost always turn out to be heroes; conversely, when women narrate their stories, in most cases they end up downplaying themselves (Barret & Davidson, 2006). Therefore, when conversing with a man, it is only appropriate to let him speak first, since when a woman interrupts him, it is possible for her to say something that might make her sound not as intelligent as the man. When speaking, a woman needs to speak in a non-assertive manner since the man always tends to be extremely assertive and direct to the point. Apparently, most men speak monotonously and loudly as compared to the majority of women. However, critics argue that from a tender age both males and females are taught distinctive linguistic practices (Barret & Davidson, 2006). For instance, communicative behaviors considered as acceptable for boys might be considered as utterly improper for girls. While a boy might be allowed to use harsh language, a girl in a similar situation might be prompted to apply her manners to behave like a lady. Research indicates that women encounter linguistic discrimination in the manner in which they are taught to use language, as well as in the manner in which usage of general language treats them. For instance, women tend to reflect their role within the social order by applying tag questions, qualifiers and fillers for softening what they need to say. Women demonstrate their subordinate status by evading direct and intimidating communication (Barret & Davidson, 2006). Whereas recently this gap has narrowed, the society holds a tendency of implying that maleness happens to be the standard of normalcy. The most delicate of all distinctions happens to be non-verbal cues, with the majority of men and women assuming that they have the capability to understand each other's body language (Crawford, 1995). Considering that men and women are inclined to focus mostly on listening and verbal communication, in most cases non-verbal cues are ignored. In most conversations, women tend to express exaggerated emotions; they smile and nod their head when they are speaking and listening. Apparently, nodding the head is not only a sign of understanding but also a way of gaining acceptance. For instance, when a woman is speaking to a man, she tends to look straight at his eyes, smile and nod her head when agreeing to or relating what is being said; on the other hand, men tend to make extreme eye contact, probably to indicate dominance (Crawford, 1995). The woman percieves direct eye contact as an indication of trust; therefore, she has minimal eye contact with the man unless she fully trusts him; however, the man perceives this as a sign of shyness and timidity. Though non-verbal cues are ignored in most cases, they are perhaps the most significant keys in realizing the distinctions in communication between men and women. Considering that ethics are extremely necessary in today's society, it is essential to have ethical communication, which facilitates the person’s freedom of choice through giving that person accurate bases for an accurate choice, which is essential in interpersonal communication. Ethics create the stage for not only a fair but also a reasonable conversation (Crawford, 1995). It is extremely hard to differentiate what is ethical or unethical when it comes to communication. It is possible to realize different perceptions between a man and a woman when they engage in a conversation. The manner in which they speak is distinctive, the non-verbal cues happen to be different, while at the same time the words they use tend to be different. Though the communication between a man and a woman tends to differ greatly, they are still capable of understanding each other (Crawford, 1995). Recent research has been helpful in informing the public that gender differences within communication are not things that people were born with and they are not a result of differences in brain matter, and they are certainly not a result of the two sexes being from different planets. Rather, people happen to be who they are, and they communicate as they do since it is what society and culture demand of them (Barret & Davidson, 2006). Though this seems like a basic distinction that might easily be resolved, it is surprising how complicated this whole issue is; irrespective of everything a person has ever learned, to concern the distinction in communication between boys and girls happens to be a mighty monumental task. References Crawford, M. (1995). Talking difference: On gender and language. Ohio: SAGE. Barret, Mary, & Davidson, Marilyn (2006). Gender and communication at work. New Jersey: Ashgate Publishing, Ltd. Read More