Why People Stay in Unhealthy Relationships - Research Paper Example

Topic:  Relationship 101- Why People Stay in Unhealthy Relationships Relationships! Yes, we all want to be in a relationship no matter whether we recognize it healthy or unhealthy. Everyone knows why someone stays in a healthy relationship, but why people remain in an unhealthy relationship is indeed a confusing thing. According to (Fiona) “Some people choose to stay in unhealthy relationships because of love, some people are unsure if their relationship is an unhealthy one, some are scared to leave”.

People are often confused when it comes to relationships, and mostly don’t know what to expect from a man or woman when they are together. Mostly, they believe that, what they get is what they deserve and usually settle for less. Being in a unhealthy relationship is not only bad for both the parties on physical and mental health basis, but it also create stress and discomfort among them on a significant level. As per, (Lizotte),“One of the essential elements to achieving a better life is the quality of our relationships.

Published research indicates that relationships can actually contribute to a person’s longevity and well being”. A loving and considerate partner not only makes one cheerful, but also helps in boosting up of the confidence level of a person .A healthy relationship is created when both the parties have a deep understanding about each other, and know inside that they care for each other, no matter what the situation is. “A healthy relationship is when two people compliment one another in their ideas, their lifestyles, in work and I play.

” (Hauslendale,141) Many a times, people stay in an unhealthy or unhappy relationship, just because they think they deserve what they get .They think that all they can have is what they have been getting and cannot expect more than that. (Messiah College) states that “Deciding whether a relationship is healthy or unhealthy is rarely cut and dried and getting free of an unhealthy relationship can also be tricky”. One has to really has to analyze why he or she is in a specific relationship and what is holding them back in that relationship, when they are really undergoing lot of stress and trauma being in it.

According to, (Allene) relationships are a necessary part of healthy living, but there is no such thing as a perfect relationship.  Relationships, from acquaintances to romances, have the potential to enrich our lives and add to our enjoyment of life.  However, these same relationships can cause discomfort, and sometimes even cause harm”. A relationship should give people happiness, comfort and mental and physical completeness. If one fined that they are restless, irritable and frustrated in a relationship then they should confront their partners about it and discuss it clearly and openly.

Mainly people tend to hold on in an unhealthy relationship when they are desperately in love with the other partner. As per (Shore,15)“One of the most common characteristics of an unhealthy relationship is two people who continue doing same things that have never worked for them in the past and can’t possible work for them in the future”. In such situation one need to listen to the inner voice and should face the situation boldly and move on in life. People are most of the time afraid to pull back from an unhappy relationship because they do not want to step out of the comfort zone.

They thing they are better off in the current relationship and if they come out of it, they need to stay single or alone for ever. They find comfort in what they have got and try to hide their negative emotions and feeling under the pillow. (Health Place) writes that , “Unhealthy relationships can leave us feeling uncomfortable, sad and afraid”. It can also build up stress on both the parties and can harm the mental and physical health of the partners. According to (Pinkerton)“Healthy relationships always add to a person's well being.

But, unhealthy relationships often cause stress and subtract from their happiness. Such relationships often leave them feeling depleted of energy”. So in order to lead a health and stress free life, one has to assess and evaluate the relationship one is in and should find the positive and negative aspect of it. If the negative aspects are more and dangerous, one should make a strong decision to leave their partner to lead a better quality life. This is not a very easy task to do, but one need to have strong determination, confidence and trust in one self.

(Moffitt, 70-78) claims that, “Basically in an unhealthy relationship, your sense of an open, vulnerable self is ravaged and your connection to spirit is suppressed”. It is always better to lead a single life than stick around a bad partner. According to (White, 15) “You must be in a relationship with people who have a common goal and values, if you do not have common direction, you may end up in conflict continually”. Bibliography Allen, Nikole. "Healthy vs. Unhealthy Relationships ." www.depts.

washington.edu. University of Washington, 15-04-2009. Web. 20 Mar 2011. . This article is taken form the website of University of Washington. Here the author writes that relationship is a core of a healthy living and there is no such thing as a perfect relationship. She states that relationship can make you happy and sometimes can make you extremely distressed. Hauslendale, Meilena. Recognizing Unhealthy Relationships: Guide to Healthy Love & Self Discovery . 1sted.,. Atlanta: Hauslendale Publishing, 2007. 141. Print.

This book is about how one can lead a healthy life and discover oneself in a positive manner. The author states that in a healthy relationship the partners have to compliment each other in every aspect of life. This book helped in understanding the unity needed in building a strong relationship Health Place, . "What Constitutes an Unhealthy Relationship? ." www.healthyplace.com. America's Mental Helath Channel, 24-11-2008. Web. 20 Mar 2011.