Are Children Harmed by Divorce - Research Paper Example

?Divorce: Effects on Children Introduction Divorce, although sometimes seen as a social stigma, is widely accepted in communities of several countries. The value of marriage is not seen as high as it was in the previous decades and centuries, and its dissolution, given their own reasons, seem common among many couples. Religious, moral, and legal concerns are only some issues highly linked to divorce. The divorce rate statistics in the United States have fallen in the recent years, but they are still considerably high, taking into consideration figures from other countries. In 2007, divorce rate was at 3.6 per 1,000 people, 3.5 in 2009, and 3.4 in 2009 (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention [CDC]). The drop in these rates is attributed to several factors, including the increasing incidences of cohabitation versus marriage. However, the emphasis of this paper dwells on the negative effects of parental divorce to children. Certainly, the causal relationship of parental divorce to harm on children is widely known, but some of these disadvantages are specified, as supported by previous researches. Reasons for divorce Couples do not just choose to divorce for one reason. Many factors are taken into consideration before the decision is finally made. As society has changed how it perceives marriage and the family, the purpose of staying together has also been modified, abolishing strict conformity to traditional roles and concepts. Common reasons for divorce are communication problems, financial difficulties, change in priorities, lack of commitment to the marriage, and infidelity. Such decision may also be influenced by physical, emotional, or sexual abuse by one partner to the other, failed expectations, inability to resolve conflicts together, child rearing issues, or addictions and substance abuse. Most of the time, reasons for divorce have intertwined or piled up causes where one or both partners eventually give up trying to fix their marriage and run to divorce as the “best” solution to their problems. Effects on children Divorce may offer advantages to adults, like pursuing a new career or a new partner, but children “see no benefit in divorce” (Clarke-Stewart and Brentano 106). Reactions of children towards their parents’ separation may vary, but it could utterly affect them. Although more recent literatures contend that there are cases where children of divorce handle and survive this crisis after an ample amount of time, more often the negative effects occur rather than the positive reaction. Offsprings of divorce encounter more stresses that children in intact families do not have to experience. These stressors may affect children in various ways and in several aspects. According to age group Clarke-Stewart and Brentano (2006) present the effects of divorce to children according to age group. It does not necessarily mean, however, that these children are not able to function well in the presence of these emotions and experiences. It merely expresses that various ages react to the news of divorce differently. A. Infants and pre-schoolers Because infants are not yet fully emotionally attached to the parent they will be “losing” it is assumed that there will be no strong effects (109). The absence of the father will not create huge changes in the infant’s routine as long as the mother continues to nurture the baby well. However, in cases where the mother is stressed and tremendously affected with the crisis, the infant is vulnerable and prone to have insecure and disorganized maternal attachment if they have regular overnight visits from their fathers. Children of this age group who are victims of parental divorce are also seen to be less positive, affectionate, and engaged when playing with their mothers as compared to those who belong in married families, implying that divorce affects emotional relationship with the mother in infants and toddlers (109). Preschoolers tend to be more affected, confused of what is going on in the household and sometimes seeing themselves at fault for their parents’ separation. This would sometimes lead the child to regress into earlier developmental stages, and have nightmares and tantrums more often than those who did not experience parental divorce. B. School-age children School-age children may feel upset, anxious, and powerless in the loss of a parent and an intact family even if they understand what is going on at home (113). Younger school-age children are pained and anxious, and long for the presence of the other parent, which is usually the father, and wish they could spend more time together. Older school-age are commonly angry, and find one parent to blame for the other’s pain. There is also larger awareness on social, financial, and legal problems. The older school-age child may ponder on the divorce often even if they do not want to, sometimes disrupting their attention in class or sleep. C. Young adolescents The adolescents’ greater awareness of their parents’ problems and greater understanding of the separation do not necessarily equate to less sorrow, sadness, or fear of divorce (116). Adjustment to the crisis is better in this age group, but the developmental task they are undergoing in finding their identities tend to pose increased conflicts in the family relationship. Because they think of themselves more, they usually do not value the perspective of their parents, but rather dwell on arrangements that would benefit them most. Depression may result from the divorce due to added responsibilities and sudden urge to be “mature.” D. Young adults Even if young adult children are no longer living at home, they are still affected by their parents’ divorce (119). There are concerned of their parents, especially their mothers, whom they perceive to be unhappy as compared to their fathers who seem to cope up well with the separation. Maturity may urge them to care for their parents after divorce, a demand which could also be stressful to the child. Psychological symptoms may occur, coupled with unstable relationships with their own partners, and possible unemployment (119). Other aspects: Research evidences A. Emotional and psychological Families who undergo parental divorce may react differently to the situation. Some families may “bounce back” a short time after the divorce, but most encounter several other problems after parents have separated. The emotional effect of divorce on children has most often been seen to be negative, affecting the child in his or current state, and reaching even into adulthood. Children “may feel alienated from their peers, or stigmatized by the loss of a ‘normal’ two-parent household...confused and angry...” that may cause them to become “defiant, violent...decline academic performance; become promiscuous; or choose to abuse illegal substances” (Cameron 25). Additionally, they may feel insecure and fear the future, fear being abandoned and rejected, may see themselves at fault, feel powerless, sad, stressed, lonely, angry, and depressed (Mackenzie). These emotional consequences to children sometimes become the “binding force” that compels parents to stay together. However, in the event that divorce indeed occurs despite considering every situation, parents are foremost responsible in helping their children adjust to the situation. In a Dutch study, association between parental divorce and depressive symptoms changes during early adolescence was undertaken, including a comparison between the developmental patterns for both boys and girls (Oldehinkel et al.). As gathered, results expose that parental divorce and depressive symptoms were strongly associated with middle adolescent girls than middle adolescent boys, which were based both on self and parent-reports (289). Several other studies have shown that girls are more sensitive to interpersonal events as compared to boys. This would imply that parents who have middle adolescent girls during the time of divorce should pay close attention to the psychological and emotional condition of their daughters. B. Academic The timing of divorce is said to be related to the trajectories of behavioral outcomes and academic grades of children (Lansford et al.). Researchers find that parental divorce during elementary school adversely affects internalizing and externalizing problems, while later divorce has more adverse affect on the grades of the child (298). Children who experience parental divorce at a young age do not usually understand why their parents opt to separate. Some may even think that one parent does not want to stay because of them, or may see themselves as to blame for such incidence. In addition, children may feel deserted when one of their parents leave home. In cases where parental divorce happens at a later age, academic performance is seen to be affected, where probable factors include less parental support and monitoring. Academic expectations concerning grades rise and become more rigorous as children become older, and added family dilemmas may pressure the child to an extent that is hard to handle, thus contributing to a decline in academic performance. C. Social Tomcikova et al. explored the connection between parental divorce and adolescent drunkenness and the contribution of family structure, socioeconomic position, social support from family and well-being in this area. The outcomes of the study show that adolescent drunkenness in the four weeks in which the research was conducted was affected by parental divorce, high socioeconomic position, low social support from the family, and high depression or anxiety. It was also noted that drunkenness decreased only slightly even after adding social support. It is indicated that parental divorce influences the risk behavior of the adolescent besides that of the influence of socioeconomic position and well-being. The family is seen as an important factor in molding the values of children, and especially in guiding them as they reach adolescence. Excessive alcohol consumption is a common problem in any society, and adolescents may run to this act as an escape to problems. Parental divorce may be taken very heavily by some adolescents which would result to depression, in which they see drinking as a way to forget this dilemma in their home. D. Spiritual Religious or spiritual aspects of children of divorce have not been as widely studied as other factors. However, the meager amount of available resources for such issue contend that there is a link between parental divorce and the religious or spiritual conditions of the children. Zhai et al. focus their research on the religious or spiritual behaviors of young adult offsprings of divorce, and find that this population has lower average levels of religious attendance compared with young adults with intact families, but non-organizational religious involvement or subjective religiousness was not seen to have evidence of decline in the presence of parental divorce (139). Also, the study presents that divorced fathers are not as engaged to religious socialization as fathers in intact families, which is dubbed to be the explanation why young adults have low religious attendance (139). Because mothers are usually favored in terms of custody arrangements, the time divorced fathers spend with their children may be utilized to strengthen their bond through leisure activities, instead of spiritual or religious socialization. Judgementalism or exclusion from other church members may also be perceived by the family who experienced parental divorce. The subjective closeness to God, on the other hand, differs among individuals, where it is possible that a confidential relationship with God may be strengthened at this time of distress. Long-term effects Amato and Cheadle study the connection between divorce in the grandparent generation and effects to the grandchild generation. Results show that divorce between grandparents was associated with various problematic outcomes for their grandchildren, which include lower educational attainment, greater marital discord, and poorer quality relationships with mothers and fathers (202). It is remarkable to note that not only are children affected from previous parental divorce, but it may also affect later generations. Although the studies have several limitations, the main hypothesis that divorce has a long-term effect is indeed visible in the gathered data. Conclusion Divorce is seen as a continuous dilemma commonly occurring among couples in the society. It encompasses several issues, but a concern widely endeavored upon is its consequences on the children of divorce. As mentioned in the paper, divorce may be coped up well by children but most of the time it is equated to negative aftermaths. It stresses children in different age groups, and affects them in several aspects. Not only are there emotional, social, and psychological problems, academic performance is also disturbed, as well as religious attendance. Evidences presented in this paper prove that divorce can harm the children tremendously. These must be considered by the parents upon making their decisions in the dissolution of marriage. Works Cited Amato, Paul R., and Jacob Cheadle. “The Long Reach of Divorce: Divorce and Child Well-Being across Three Generations.” Journal of Marriage and Family 67.1 (2005): 191-206. Print. Cameron, Leah. “The Possible Negative Emotional and Psychological Consequences in Children of Divorce.” ESSAI 6.1 (2008): 25-30. Print. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. “Births, Marriages, Divorces, and Deaths: Provisional Data for November 2009.” National Vital Statistics Report 58.23 (2010): 1-6. Web. 15 Feb. 2011. . Clarke-Stewart, Alison, and Cornelia Brentano. Divorce: Causes and Consequences. Connecticut: Yale University Press, 2006. Print. Lansford, Jennifer E., et al. “Trajectories of Internalizing, Externalizing, and Grades for Children Who Have and Have Not Experienced Their Parents’ Divorce or Separation.” Journal of Family Psychology 20.2 (2006): 292-301. Print. Mackenzie, Caroline. “Emotional Effects of Divorce on Children.” Deal With Divorce. Deal With Divorce, n.d. Web. 16 Feb. 2011. . Oldehinkel, Albertine J., et al. “Parental Divorce and Offspring Depressive Symptoms: Dutch Developmental Trends During Early Adolescence.” Journal of Marriage and Family 70 (2008): 284-293. Print. Tomcikova, Z., A. Madarasa Geckova, O. Orosova, J.P. van Dijk, and S.A. Reijneveld. “Parental Divorce and Adolescent Drunkenness: Role of Socioeconomic Position, Psychological Well-Being and Social Support.” European Addiction Research 509 (2009): 1-7. Web. 16 Feb. 2011. . Zhai, Jiexia E., Christopher G. Ellison, Norval D. Glenn, and Elizabeth Marquardt. “Parental Divorce and Religious Involvement among Young Adults.” Sociology of Religion 68.2 (2007): 125-144. Print. Read More