Communication and Conflict - Essay Example

There was a time when I had placed my homework on my classroom desk, but when I turned around it was gone. My seatmate said the class bully pilfered it when I was not looking, but I was too scared to confront him. I suffered a “no homework” mark on that day, but I would rather have had that grade than confront the bully. I avoided conflict as much as possible, but most especially with him. There was not much criteria that went into that decision; it was purely fear and a desire for self preservation.

I felt that confronting him would only make me a more appealing target for him, so I maintained a low profile, thinking that we won’t be classmates forever anyway. I was glad when the classes were reshuffled and we had different classmates the following year. “HE SAID, SHE SAID” A Case Study 1. Overview of the case The case deals with a family whose members are currently experiencing conflicts of relationships. The causes of conflict are typical for most families: a teen-ager who tests his parent’s limits, a mother who tends to be lenient towards her son, and a father-figure who has difficulty asserting his authority partly because of his informal role in the family (i.e., as the mother’s fiance). 2. Presentation of the key facts Marie, an adult college student and mother of fifteen-year-old son Lenny, gives him a scolding when he comes home too late without calling.

She attempts to impose a 10 p.m. curfew on her son for the next four weekends. Marie resents her fiance Mike’s intervention when he breaks off the scolding and puts off the discussion for the next day. She points out that he has no authority in the discipline of her son. The following day, Marie ignores Mike’s approach at reconciliation, but quickly forgives and forgets her son’s transgression of the previous night. Mike and Lenny leave, both of them forgetting to greet Marie on her birthday. 3. Source of conflict Marie: There are two running conflicts involving Marie, one with Lenny and the other with Mike.

The conflict with Lenny has to do with his seeming disregard for her as a person of authority. Lenny coming home late without calling, and getting away with irresponsible acts. At first, Marie was aggressive-assertive in nagging Lenny. Marie used threat of punishment in an attempt, or maybe a guise, to discipline, but even the relatively light penalty of coming home before 10 on Saturdays seemed a tentative punishment, which Marie did not appear to seriously have the resolve to carry out. The following day, she employed avoidance by denying there was a conflict.

Marie rationalized her son’s actions by telling herself that he was a good boy and did not do anything really wrong. The second conflict involving Marie is her perception of Mike’s interference in and disapproval of the way she disciplines her son. When Lenny arrived home late, she initially addressed this conflict by competition with Mike. The following day, she used avoidance by being noncommittal when Mike approached to kiss her. Mike: Mike’s source of conflict is Marie’s failure to discipline her son.

Uses avoidance, at least when the conflict is still heated and confrontation is high. While he is non confrontational, however, Mike seeks to engage the issues when he perceives that temperatures have gone down. Mike may try to assert himself, but in this situation, being only a boyfriend to Lenny’s mother. Strictly speaking, it is not his place to discipline his girlfriend’