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The Effects of Technology on Our Reading Behavior - Essay Example

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The paper "The Effects of Technology on Our Reading Behavior" states that the only area that the author should address is the thesis statement which should be restated properly to encompass whatever is in the essay as well as the use of a proper conclusive statement…
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The Effects of Technology on Our Reading Behavior
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Peer Reviews What is the paper’s thesis? Discuss its visibility and clarity. whether or not you feel it is in the right place and whether or not it fulfills the assignment: is it related to our course theme, etc.? Is the author’s thesis making a reasonable and arguable claim? The thesis of this paper is the effects of technologies on our reading behavior. The thesis statement is visibly clear and to the point. It is a good thesis statement because it makes it very easy to understand what the student is going to talk about in the rest of the essay. It does fulfil the assignment on the use of technology in education, the relationship between the statement and the course is related to the course theme and it makes a reasonable claim which is also arguable. This makes it a legible assignment. 2. Discuss the paper’s scope and focus. Does the introduction give enough contexts for the argument? Are there clear “boundaries” to what the author is discussing in the paper? Can you tell that the author is responding to a research question appropriately? In the introduction, can you see where the paper is going, and can you track the thesis throughout the paper? The scope of the paper is primarily on the effects of technologies on how students take their studies. It is very easy to follow on the student’s argument throughout the essay and it is related to the topic statement. The flow of the paper is also seamless 3. How does the paper flow? Are the author’s points easy to follow? Are there any places where the author could make stronger transitions between points? Do the paragraph breaks make sense? Is the author relating individual points to one another—AND back to the thesis? Does every paragraph in this paper follow from the thesis? The flow of the paper is also seamless. The points are easy to follow and the paragraphs breaks make reason. This makes the points to relate to one another easily. The conclusion on the essay is also well formatted with the author referencing to the papers thesis. The author can make the conclusion more captivating to the reader through better examples 4. Does the author provide a conclusion with an effective restatement of the paper’s thesis? Does the conclusion end the paper on a convincing note? Do you have ideas about ways the author might make the conclusion more interesting to the reader? The conclusion on the essay is well formatted with the author referencing to the papers thesis. The author can make the conclusion more captivating to the reader through better examples. RESEARCH/EVIDENCE/MLA FORMAT 5. Discuss the author’s use of evidence from research sources. Is the author using reliable sources, or are any of the sources potentially unreliable? Are there places where more research would help, where the author needs more examples, or where the author needs more explanation of what the research means? Does there seem to be any place where there is too much information from sources, such that the source material overwhelms the author’s own voice? The sources can be relied upon though more sources from academic journals can make the work better. Some sources actually do overwhelm the authors own voice and this should be addressed to make the research better. 6. Is the research smoothly integrated into the paper (does the author use signal phrases, etc., to make quotes fit into his/her own sentences), and are all sources cited with internal citations and Works Cited entries according to MLA format? Are there any words or ideas that appear to have come from a source and are not yet documented? Remember: using works or ideas from a source without documenting them is plagiarism; if you have ANY questions about properly documenting your sources, please ask! Integration of the research into the paper so smoothly done and this makes it authentic. There are no cases of undocumented materials used in the work which is good. The MLA referencing rules are followed in the in-text citation but there should be improvement in the reference list. GENERAL COMMENTS 7. Compliment the author: note the best/most effective aspects of his/her paper. The most effective aspects of the research is the flow, it is captivating for the reader to go through the research as there is coherence of ideas. 8. Is there anything in the paper that is not yet clear to you? Is anything missing? The only aspect that should be changed by the author is the use of so much work from other sources which actually overwhelms his work. Student 2 1. What is the paper’s thesis? Discuss its visibility and clarity. Note whether or not you feel it is in the right place and whether or not it fulfills the assignment: is it related to our course theme, etc.? Is the author’s thesis making a reasonable and arguable claim? The student covered a research on the thesis statement that focuses on Amazon Company. Though this is the case, there is no express thesis statement rather than that one that the business focuses on making profits only. 2. Discuss the paper’s scope and focus. Does the introduction give enough context for the argument? Are there clear “boundaries” to what the author is discussing in the paper? Can you tell that the author is responding to a research question appropriately? In the introduction, can you see where the paper is going, and can you track the thesis throughout the paper? The scope of the paper is primarily on amazon business on education services such as books and other products. The boundaries are not clear and the researcher is not responding appropriately to the research question. Having no express thesis, it can’t be traces. The introduction of the essay is a bit not well done and there is observed incoherence in the work of the researcher for example in a statement that ‘Amazon only cares about revenue but the quality of the books that it chooses to sell on its site’ this statement does not flow well with the ideas in the research. Based on this fact the author should try to create well flowing essay. 3. How does the paper flow? Are the author’s points easy to follow? Are there any places where the author could make stronger transitions between points? Do the paragraph breaks make sense? Is the author relating individual points to one another—AND back to the thesis? Does every paragraph in this paper follow from the thesis? The flow of the paper, save for the issues mentioned above is average and a keen reader can be able to follow the authors arguments. Paragraphs do not reflect on the thesis. That should be improved. 4. Does the author provide a conclusion with an effective restatement of the paper’s thesis? Does the conclusion end the paper on a convincing note? Do you have ideas about ways the author might make the conclusion more interesting to the reader? The conclusion provided by the author is effective since it captures the spirit in the thesis statements based on Amazon Company. It is also convincing in a way concerning the business carried out by amazon. It can be bettered through more examples 5. Discuss the author’s use of evidence from research sources. Is the author using reliable sources, or are any of the sources potentially unreliable? Are there places where more research would help, where the author needs more examples, or where the author needs more explanation of what the research means? Does there seem to be any place where there is too much information from sources, such that the source material overwhelms the author’s own voice? Evidence from research sources is scant but the sources included are reliable ones. There is no conclusion on a convincing note in the essay and the author should use more examples to illustrate the thesis better. 6. Is the research smoothly integrated into the paper (does the author use signal phrases, etc., to make quotes fit into his/her own sentences), and are all sources cited with internal citations and Works Cited entries according to MLA format? Are there any words or ideas that appear to have come from a source and are not yet documented? Remember: using works or ideas from a source without documenting them is plagiarism; if you have ANY questions about properly documenting your sources, please ask! Research is also smoothly integrated into the paper and the author does use some quotes and signal phrases which fits in his/ her own sentences. This gives the body a smooth flow. The sources are well documented and there is no plagiarism. 7. Compliment the author: note the best/most effective aspects of his/her paper. The most appropriate thing about this paper is the numerous references which are made and which are relevant to the topic in question. 8. Is there anything in the paper that is not yet clear to you? Is anything missing? The work has an issue with the flow of information in that some statements are not coherent. The author should improve on the flow. Student 3 1. What is the paper’s thesis? Discuss its visibility and clarity. Note whether or not you feel it is in the right place and whether or not it fulfills the assignment: is it related to our course theme, etc.? Is the author’s thesis making a reasonable and arguable claim? The author focuses on the thesis of the popularization of the use of eBooks since 190s. The introduction is well thought of and it in a great manner reelects on the issue of adoption of and popularization of eBooks in the modern world. It also forms an arguable proposition. 2. Discuss the paper’s scope and focus. Does the introduction give enough context for the argument? Are there clear “boundaries” to what the author is discussing in the paper? Can you tell that the author is responding to a research question appropriately? In the introduction, can you see where the paper is going, and can you track the thesis throughout the paper? The scope and the focus of the paper is the modern use of eBooks in the advancement of education. The introduction gives context enough for the argument and there is proper response to the research question. Though, the thesis cannot be traced throughout the paper. 3. How does the paper flow? Are the author’s points easy to follow? Are there any places where the author could make stronger transitions between points? Do the paragraph breaks make sense? Is the author relating individual points to one another—AND back to the thesis? Does every paragraph in this paper follow from the thesis? The flow of the paper from the introduction to the body and finally to the conclusion is also well done with the coherence of ideas and the layout of sentences as well as transitions between paragraphs. The only aspect is that some of the paragraphs deviate from the primary objective of the thesis. 4. Does the author provide a conclusion with an effective restatement of the paper’s thesis? Does the conclusion end the paper on a convincing note? Do you have ideas about ways the author might make the conclusion more interesting to the reader? The conclusion of the work is poorly done; there is no association between the thesis and the body of the essay and the final views. The paper does not conclude on a convincing note. To make it interesting to the reader, the author should ensure flow. 5. Discuss the author’s use of evidence from research sources. Is the author using reliable sources, or are any of the sources potentially unreliable? Are there places where more research would help, where the author needs more examples, or where the author needs more explanation of what the research means? Does there seem to be any place where there is too much information from sources, such that the source material overwhelms the author’s own voice? The author’s use of reference for sources of work is well done. There is however an issue with citation in the text and this should be addressed for the better of the research. The author should also integrate the issues with real life situations in a more compelling way. 6. Is the research smoothly integrated into the paper (does the author use signal phrases, etc., to make quotes fit into his/her own sentences), and are all sources cited with internal citations and Works Cited entries according to MLA format? Are there any words or ideas that appear to have come from a source and are not yet documented? Remember: using works or ideas from a source without documenting them is plagiarism; if you have ANY questions about properly documenting your sources, please ask! The integration of the paper into the research is also wanting to some extent. Though there are no sources that come from undocumented sources, the citing in text does not follow MLA guidelines as well as the reference list. 7. Compliment the author: note the best/most effective aspects of his/her paper. The author has a stronghold in language command and use of proper grammar in his/her essay. This makes it easier to understand and follow since it makes the work have proper flow. 8. Is there anything in the paper that is not yet clear to you? Is anything missing? There are issues with referencing inside the text. The author should revisit the manuals for proper citation since this will enhance the work submitted. Student 4 1. What is the paper’s thesis? Discuss its visibility and clarity. Note whether or not you feel it is in the right place and whether or not it fulfills the assignment: is it related to our course theme, etc.? Is the author’s thesis making a reasonable and arguable claim? The author of this work has the thesis title that Electronic books are inevitable. The thesis statement should be stated in a manner that it can be explored and not as a flat statement as done in this case. 2. Discuss the paper’s scope and focus. Does the introduction give enough context for the argument? Are there clear “boundaries” to what the author is discussing in the paper? Can you tell that the author is responding to a research question appropriately? In the introduction, can you see where the paper is going, and can you track the thesis throughout the paper? The scope of the paper is on electronic books. The author has done a commendable work in the introduction and there is also a smooth flow of information in the work. It can be traced where the paper is going and the thesis statement can be properly traced in the paper. 3. How does the paper flow? Are the author’s points easy to follow? Are there any places where the author could make stronger transitions between points? Do the paragraph breaks make sense? Is the author relating individual points to one another—AND back to the thesis? Does every paragraph in this paper follow from the thesis? The paragraphs are well arranged which makes the flow of ideas to be seamless and well done. The paper flows from the thesis in an appropriate manner and the transitions from one paragraph to the other are also properly done. The individual points do relate to one another hence the smooth flow. 4. Does the author provide a conclusion with an effective restatement of the paper’s thesis? Does the conclusion end the paper on a convincing note? Do you have ideas about ways the author might make the conclusion more interesting to the reader? The conclusion of the work is poorly done. It does not capture the thesis statement as much as it should. The conclusion is not properly convincing to the reader and it can be made more interesting by relating it to the thesis statement. 5. Discuss the author’s use of evidence from research sources. Is the author using reliable sources, or are any of the sources potentially unreliable? Are there places where more research would help, where the author needs more examples, or where the author needs more explanation of what the research means? Does there seem to be any place where there is too much information from sources, such that the source material overwhelms the author’s own voice? The author has used proper sources which makes it easier to track the information. The sources are reliable and relevant to the thesis statement. There is no place with so much information that the authors work is overshadowed. More examples are however still needed. 6. Is the research smoothly integrated into the paper (does the author use signal phrases, etc., to make quotes fit into his/her own sentences), and are all sources cited with internal citations and Works Cited entries according to MLA format? Are there any words or ideas that appear to have come from a source and are not yet documented? Remember: using works or ideas from a source without documenting them is plagiarism; if you have ANY questions about properly documenting your sources, please ask! The integration of ideas in the research paper has also been done well with the author using his own phrases to create credible sentences which fits properly in the context. The author has also used proper referencing within the text which follows the MLA referencing guidelines. 7. Compliment the author: note the best/most effective aspects of his/her paper. The author is however advantaged in the area of coherence in that the point in the body and shifting from one paragraph to another is properly done. 8. Is there anything in the paper that is not yet clear to you? Is anything missing? The only area that the author should address is the thesis statement which should be restated properly to encompass whatever is in the essay as well as the use of proper conclusive statement. (Writing .edu, 2014) Bibliography Writing .edu. "Ending the Essay: Conclusions." 12 May 2014. Writing. Edu. Print. 11 March 2015. Read More
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