Aris Dilemma - Essay Example

Andrew Warren ETS September 29th Ari’s Dilemma Ari Geller sat uncomfortably on the large sofa set that was positioned directly behind one of the numerous hallways in the huge house. “Al Khobar,” she intoned under her breath. She resisted the temptation to cast another glance at her older sister-in-law. She had been sitting in silence for more than an hour now. She had never imagined that it would be like this. She remembered, for the 100th time, how her mother had gasped in shock when she brought Bilal to their home in Western Texas. Her father tried desperately to pretend that he was pleased at his daughter’s choice of friend. However, the rest of her family only gaped at his elaborate headdress. Bilal was kind enough. Her mother had purposefully tried to make him feel uncomfortable. She constantly wore, on her face, expressions full of hatred at Bilal. She permitted him to talk or comment on anything without openly opposing his comments. Beside, she constantly criticized Bilal’s Muslim culture and culture pointing out the unjust and monopolistic way they treated their women. In addition, she kept telling Bilal that he is not any different from all his Muslim folks as long as they live in Saudi Arabia. Bilal tried to persevere the rampage, from his to be mother-in-law, in silence, perhaps accepting the truth in silence. “Ghayda!” Ari took some moments to realize that it was she who was being addressed by the old woman at the door to her right. “Ghayda!” Her husband’s aunt had given her the name to make her a complete Saudi Arabian. The old woman motioned towards the kitchen. Ari stretched and began to stand in haste. Her aunt-in-law indicated her veil, which was carelessly tossed on the arm of the chair she had been sitting on. Ari wanted to protest. She could not imagine any of the family’s males going to the kitchen. However, she had noticed since arriving at Al Khobar that Saudi Arabian women rarely, if ever, answered back to their elders or men of any age. She knew the kitchen would be stifling. In addition, there were no windows that were large enough to let in some air. All of them were positioned near the roof, in order to prevent the possibility of strangers looking in to see the women of the house. Ari forced a smile on her face, roughly tugged the head veil around her moon-face, and followed her aunt-in-law. The kitchen was large enough for the two women to work at different stations. The old woman motioned at a board that had an assortment of carrots, garlic, onions, and meat. Ari understood immediately that the old woman wished her to cut these foodstuffs to small pieces. She smiled at the older woman, made bowing motions, and went to her workplace. Of all the inhabitants in the house, Ari liked the woman who had re-baptized her ‘Ghayda’ the most. This was because the old woman would leave her alone with her thoughts; and did not try to make conversation by means of tedious signs and symbols that made no sense. As she began to slice the carrots, Ari observed the necessary silence, avoiding conversations with her elderly mentor as per the custom. In dismay, Ari recalled the warnings, against marrying Bilal. The echoes of her mother’s warnings reverberated in her mind. Her choice to re-baptize her life despite Joyce’ constant warnings tormented her. She had been reduced to nothingness finally. Her career dreams shattered. Her intended happiness with Bilal turned into a life of despair and desperation. She had recently begun to re-examine her decision to become Bilal’s wife. When he proposed to her in the United States, she was so excited that she had screamed with happiness. She had never met a man who was as deeply expressive as he. Bilal would literally speak to her in the form of poems. He spoke of love in a way that blew her mind. She remembered when he referred to her as ‘My Love’, in front of their friends in college. While many of her friends glared at the couple enviously on campus grounds, her closest friend, Joyce, warned Ari to refuse her new love. “Do you know that those men keep their women under lock and key?” she hurled at Ari when she learned of the proposal. “Please say that you will force him to agree to live with you in America after the wedding. You have no idea what you are getting into.” Ari thought Joyce was somewhat envious of her. It is a fact that Ari had always been luckier in love than her closest friend. She could not understand why Joyce never seemed to have any dates. She had never expressed this openly, as she felt that it would be a hurtful thing to hear. However, she feared that the state of datelessness was beginning to affect her friend. Ari had just ended her relationship with her third boyfriend in six months when Bilal, who was a new student, walked across the campus grounds to where she was sitting with Joyce, and declared her to be the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Ari remembered laughing with embarrassment. He really was dashingly handsome. After that first introduction, everything became a blur of happy days. Ari distanced herself from Joyce, and started to spend more time with Bilal. When he asked her to take him to her home so that he could get to know her parents and siblings, she was a bit hesitant. Her parents were not racis , far from it. They would just be extremely concerned about the choices that their daughter was making. At the end, she swallowed her doubts and took him home. That night, after an extremely uncomfortable supper, her mother asked her to remain behind after Bilal left.  “You are an adult,” the older woman began when they had retreated to the master bedroom, “and I cannot stop you from making your own decisions. I also want to acknowledge that you have the right to make mistakes and learn from them -- but I will try to stop you from making a similar one, if I can.” Both women tried to appeal to Ari’s father, who sat with a concerned look on his face at the end of the bed. He stated that he felt that Ari was making a mistake, but stressed that she had the right to make the last decision. Extremely angry and unsettled, Ari left the house. She walked to a phone booth and told Bilal, over the phone, that she wanted to marry him right away. He sounded as excited as she was angry. The ceremony, the next morning, puzzled her. The older Muslim woman in attendance exhorted her to wear a special veil to mark her as Bilal’s beloved. She was also not asked as many questions as Bilal was, by the local Imam. She shrugged and decided she would be able to adjust to her new life if she committed herself to it. Bilal next suggested that they should both visit his parents in Saudi Arabia. Ari felt a stab of regret at the fact that she had not even informed her three siblings of her new status. “I will tell them when I return”, she decided.  Bilal bought a long black garment for her as a present before they boarded the plane for Riyadh. “What is that?” she had asked smiling. “My own precious girl, all women wear this in my country. It is only for two or three days while we are there -- it will not be for too long.” She had listened to him, and believed his words. The first thing she noticed, upon reaching Riyadh, was the lack of color in the airport. All men had stark white garments, while women were completely obscured in black garments that covered even their eyes. At Bilal’s request, Ari had donned her abaya before exiting the plane. She immediately noticed that she could not see the periphery. Her walking and breathing were hampered, and she stumbled after Bilal, clutching at him because she feared that she would walk into people as she could not see clearly. She was extremely happy when they finally entered a car. Her husband’s brother had come for them. When Ari offered her hand in greeting, he smiled and kept his at his side. Her husband laughed and said, “My American child! Ari, you will learn our ways, yet!” Her husband then entered the front seat next to his brother, leaving Ari to yank up her black garment so that she could step into the car. The two men garbled in Arabic throughout the long journey, which took hours. Ari wanted to interrupt her husband and ask when they would finally arrive, but somehow felt that she would be breaking some kind of cultural code by addressing her own husband. At one point, the two men parked at a restaurant and stepped out of the car. Ari began to follow suit -- only to be pushed back into the car by her husband. “My Love, do not stress yourself, we will bring the food to you.” Bilal shoved her back into the car and smartly shut the door. It was stifling, to say the least. Ari wondered if she should at least remove the abaya, which she was already beginning to hate intensely, at least to breathe properly. She wondered, for the first time since her arrival, what she had done to herself. The men returned, and the journey continued. Ari had managed to eat a hamburger and some fries, but still felt mildly hungry. When the car entered the huge compound with several majestic houses, she was deeply frightened by the shrill ululating that greeted the two brothers. She was immediately separated from her husband, and pushed through a door that a woman said was the ‘women’s quarters’. Ari was desperate to see Bilal. In the next few days she would learn that she would see him when her mother-in-law allowed it. Even though the woman was friendly, Ari was amazed that she exercised so much control over her adult son. When she demanded to go for walks alone, the family acquiesced, but sent a car to follow her through the stately neighborhood. The driver would trail a few feet behind her. Ari grew progressively dismayed at the life she had chosen for herself. At one time, she had snapped at Bilal about his neglect of her. She did not see him again for the next two days. He would leave early for work with other male members of the family. All the women ever did was dress up to go nowhere, gossip, and eat. All of Bilal’s younger female cousins looked like older matrons due to their corpulent sizes. And then Bilal’s aunt came for a visit. “Ghayda,” she had intoned, upon first setting eyes on Ari. Once, when she saw Ari crying at a corner, she walked to her and cooed over her like a mother. “You learn, Ghayda … you learn,” she had said, wiping Ari’s eyes with the sleeve of her abaya. “It’s not so bad.” Ari was brought back to reality when she saw a coconut offering on a brown hand in front of her face. Bilal’s old aunt smiled at her, and motioned for her to try the sweet. She took some and put it in her mouth.  “It’s not too bad,” she smiled. “It’s not too bad.” Read More