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Gay Relationships - Same or Different - Essay Example

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Gay Relationships- Same or Different? Table of Contents Introduction 3 Discussion 4 Conclusion 6 Works Cited 7 Introduction The chosen text is 'Are gay relationships different?', written by John Cloud in the Health Section of Time Magazine Online edition, dated 17th of January, 2008…
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Gay Relationships - Same or Different
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Download file to see previous pages The paper explains why and how this is so, culling insights from Cloud's own seven-plus years in a failed relationship with his ex-mate Michael. In essence Cloud is saying that gay relationships are marked by a different set of dynamics owing to the following: the fact that both parties to the couple are the same sex; that homosexuals growing up often face stigmatization and experience a sense of being repressed in early life, and those color how they act in adult homosexual relationships, among other things; and that, to a certain extent, the very nature of gay relationships have within them the seeds of their own demise. The latter is a controversial assertion, but borne out by facts Cloud cites a study that found that gay couples were more likely to break up over a 12-year period than straight couples (Cloud). That said, this paper asserts that beyond distinctions of couple relationships based on gender, the universal themes that are reflected in the Aristophanes myth hold. The intensity of emotions and focus that Cloud displays in his essay reflects just how gripping and central, and painful, the experience of breaking up and losing one's other half is. Also, the way Cloud's relationship seemed to have disintegrated, and followed the seven-year pattern of many couples, indicates a kind of fated end that meets all those who seek and lose. Cloud is playing out the part that is his, in a dance with his partner that is fated to end, and beyond anyone's control to do something about, least of all the lovers themselves. As the author notes, with resignation (Cloud): And yet if ours had been a straight marriage, I have little doubt we would still be together. We had financial security and supportive families. We almost certainly would have had children. This isn't regret--fighting my homosexuality would be like shouting against the rain (Cloud). Discussion Cloud sets forth to define what it was that he wanted to find out and discuss in the essay, in a set of questions that haunted him in those early mornings after the breakup, and when he was done with his frantic going about to fill his time after that. Here we see that even Cloud could not figure out at that point what it was that happened exactly, a hint of the fated nature of the end, as if he and Michael were merely acting out parts in a script (Cloud): What impact had our homosexuality had on the longevity, arc and dissolution of our relationship? Had we given up on each other because we were men or because we were gay? Or neither? Friends offered cliches: Some people just aren't meant for each other. But our straight friends usually stayed married. Why not us? (Cloud) Cloud answers those questions in the affirmative, mainly, and that just as he could not change his sexual orientation, so too he could not change the manner in which his relationship with Michael played out and died. The seeds of that relationship and its destruction lay in themselves, and the way they are built sexually, as gays. Yet Cloud also points out that his experience in a relationship is in many ways similar to the experience of other people in relationships, regardless of sex. Underneath it all, there is the universal dictate to find someone to love and stay with. There is the sense that Cloud wanted this permanent relationship, the complete bonding with one's significant other. There is some wishful thinking in the following lines, as well as a sense of resignation regarding the fate that befalls man, who seems ...Download file to see next pagesRead More
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