Family Structure and Developing Male and Female - Essay Example

s Teacher’s April How important is a family structure for a developing male and female? What affects most on the life of a developing individual? As it is seen, the environment has maximum impact on a person’s behavior, nature, thoughts and approaches. Majority of the population of the world has turned out to be the same as their environment. The environment, within which a person survives, enormously influences the major part of a person’s character and personality, be it internal nature or external. Starting from the accent of the language and ranging to the dressing, the get up, the behavior, the conduct, the perceptions, interests, thinking and almost everything depends upon the environment in which he/she lives in. Effects of environment on a developing male and female: As the environment has the maximum impact on a person, therefore, it affects the developing or the growing children, i.e. the teenagers in the most effective manner. Hence, it proves that it is the that environment plays a vital role in determining what kind of a man or woman a developing male or female is going to be for the rest of his/her life. The kinds of atmospheres provided to a growing individual may vary from a family environment to an independent environment, i.e. without any family. Family life is indubitably completely different from the life spent by people alone in hostels, boarding school or orphanages. Therefore, the impacts of these environments entirely differ from one another. Influences of family: In my point of view, family structure is quite important for a developing male or female; though even the family structure may not be the same for all. For example, one may have a complete and happy family with both the parents and siblings living together, exhibiting love, care, affection and a perfect compatibility amongst each other. On the other hand, one may be deprived of one parent due to uncontrollable circumstances such as death of a parent or separation of both. Another circumstance may be that one may not be lucky enough to have both of the parents because of their death and might be living with the elder independent siblings or any other relative such as uncle or aunt. All of the above situations play a different role in developing a teenager’s mind to grow up into an adult. For a person who does not possess a family and is living in an orphanage, might face a lot of difficulties in life. He/she may not have anyone to take enough care and may not have a proper guidance. Therefore, he/she will learn from own mistakes and experiences. At times, such people may definitely face a lot of problems, as there are a lot of ups and downs in the growing age. Life without a family: Despite of the fluctuating life of the teenagers, some of those who are deprived of their families and a proper family structure, are yet lucky enough to have good friends or good guardians or caretakers who direct them quite well and help them to manage their problems and maintain their ways on the correct path and enlighten their future. But, the remaining unlucky ones are usually not able to differentiate between the good and bad, right and wrong, success and failure; and unintentionally spoil themselves, their lives and their future. Say for example, a growing individual might be depressed of the fact that he does not have parents to provide him good to eat and wear. This depression may cause him to become a drug or alcohol addict, so as to forget all the sorrows. Once he becomes an addict, he might adopt wrong ways of earning, such as theft etc in order to regularly buy drugs and alcohol. Eventually, he will end up being a criminal and ruin his future. Another example is teen prostitution that is again usually due to the frustration and urge to have money by hook or by crook. Therefore, the life of a developing male and female is no less than Hell if he/she is not blessed with a family structure. The above cases are not only applicable in the lives of those who do not have families, but also those, who have families, but either they are incomplete, i.e., their parents are divorced and the children are not mentally settled or their parents are living together, but are not happy and are so indulged in their personal conflicts that they are not able to pay proper attention to their offspring; and eventually, the children become the victims of apathy and negligence. In such homes, the education, grooming, happiness and everything else of the children are disregarded. The small kids far from the teenage are not able to understand the incompatibility and the tensions between their parents, but, the ones who are in the phase of growing, are able to understand the unhappy environment of their homes. They get irritated and sad whenever they see any of their friends having fun with their parents or their friends’ parents spending a good time with each other. Attempts to escape from depression: To get rid of this depression, they start taking steps towards the wrong world. They start getting away from their studies and drop their grades. When happiness is not provided to them in their homes, they try to seek pleasure in other things outside their homes. This leads them towards wrong company, wrong stuff and wrong activities as mentioned above and when they grow up and realize how they ruined their lives, it is too late to correct the mistake and very difficult to come out of the quick sand. Hence, the above circumstances prove that a proper family structure is highly important for a developing male and female. Parents’ misunderstandings about their teens: Nowadays, it seems that the teenagers are closer to their friends as compared to their family. They avoid their family and like to spend more of their time with their friends. Many parents even complain that their teens have started staying away from their parents. They give less time to their parents and spend more of their time with their friends. But, parents must understand that the fun which they experience with their friends is entirely different from that which they can do with their parents. Obviously, parents can’t all the time play video games or hang around with their children completely like their friends. Therefore, the parents must be understanding and very careful in dealing with their teens and give them enough space, instead of complaining and compelling them to spend more time with the family. Children, especially the growing ones, need friends only for fun. There are many problems in their lives which are supposed to be quite embarrassing according to them, as well as their friends. Hence, it is quite obvious that they cannot share such problems or situations with their friends. At such times, they badly need someone who may keep their secrets, not laugh at their awkward problems, guide them to the best solution and drive them out of such circumstances. Therefore, the only people who can be sincere at such times are one’s parents. The teenagers desperately need their parents to help them out as it is not possible for them to share their problems with anyone else, not even the closest friend. (Institute for American Values) Personal views of the developing individuals regarding the importance of family: During a survey, it was clearly stated by a teenager, named Brianna Lichtenauer: “Family is the most important thing to me. They are my own support system. Everybody thinks friends are more important, but they are not. Friends are great, but they will come and go. Family is always there. My family and I have very busy lives so we value our time together. We always try to have dinner together and tell each other about our day. This is a great way to bond and stay connected. I love my family and wouldn’t trade them for anything. I hope you value your family as I do because you’ll never get another one.” Another teenager, Toni shared his thoughts about his family: “In my opinion it is very crucial that families spend enough time together to have a strong bond. Your family is the only people that are going to be there with you all of your life. Boyfriends and girlfriends and most friends will vary as life goes on. You should be able to depend on your family, and have a strong relationship between each family member. Families are responsible for supporting you throughout your life. They are there to be depended on. By spending time together as a family a strong family affiliation should be formed and held dear. Most families struggle from a lack of interest. Statistics show that most teens that run away from home or “hate” their family are teens that are part of a family that does not spend enough quality time together. In order to have a relationship together you must have common interest and must spend time all together. If there is a case where there are no common interests, which there are, then you can try new things until you come across an activity you altogether enjoy. When you spend time together you learn about each other.  If you live a good life, you influence family members to look up to you and be influenced by your good deeds. You build good character and learn good qualities. Spending time with your family is something that should be cherished and memorable. The earlier you begin a relationship the easier it will be for you in the future. When your family decides to start their own family and move away, if you bond the more you will keep in touch in the future.” (North Jefferson News) Assessment of their views: The above statements show how important family is for the developing male and females. According to Brianna, Family is the most valuable treasure that she possesses. She portrays the fact that friends are a good source of enjoyment and it is good to spend time along with friends. But, there is no guarantee of friends, whereas, family is a permanent treasure and should be valued more than friends, as family is always present in all times whether good or bad. Toni displays the same idea about family and friends as said by Brianna that, friends and other companions in life vary and are not forever, whereas, family members are such companions that remain forever and can be trusted for the eternity. Another thought that Toni exhibits is that, spending time with the family helps one to develop good character and this is how one may grow up into a respectable individual in the society. All these thoughts clearly exhibit how important teenagers consider their families to be and how much they need them. Without their families, it is not possible for them to lead a good and successful life along with adopting a decent profession and maintaining a respectable position in the society. Should discriminations be encouraged on the basis of gender differences? As far as the gender differences are concerned, in my point of view, they should be avoided by the parents. In the present era, where women are moving ahead step by step along with men, there is certainly no need to treat the developing males and females differently. Discrimination should not be observed by the parents in the present era. Nowadays, men and women are equally advancing into the modern world and therefore, are facing the same situations. Years back, there was the time when a woman was only considered to stay at her home, look after her house, her husband and her children; and man was responsible to earn a living for his family. Discrimination was at that time quite applicable, as both of the genders were performing different jobs and had to face different situations in their lives. Nowadays, women are studying and working as much as men are. They go out for jobs and face the same atmosphere as faced by men. Hence, a developing female should be treated equal to a developing male and should be provided with the same training, experience, influences and teachings by their parents. Foster homes: Foster homes are care taking homes that are exclusively built to take care of the children. Those who are deprived of their parents or the whole family are taken care in the foster homes. In foster homes, children are provided with foster parents who take care of them. They provide them with a homely environment along with good to eat, good to wear and good to sleep. The foster care for every child is on the temporary basis with a varying time span, depending upon the situations of the child. The duration can be of a few days, as well as of several years. Apart from the children who do not have any family at all, those kids who have a family but do not have parents or who have only one parent and are not treated very well are also allowed to shift to the foster homes for proper care by the government, where they can have enough care and can grow up into stable individuals of the society. (Nemours) Importance of foster homes: According to me, foster homes should be encouraged which may fulfill the needs and desire of every child to have parents and family, which may provide a good family structure to the growing children and enable them to successfully advance in their lives and lead a good life. (“What is Foster Care and Why is it Needed?”) Conclusion: Thus after all the analysis, I reach to the conclusion that a good family structure is enormously important for a developing male and female to grow up into successful and capable individuals. Works Cited Institute for American Values. “Family Structure and Children's Educational Outcomes”. americanvalues.org. IAL. Nov. 2005. Web. 01 Apr. 2012. North Jefferson News. “Teens give views on why family life is important”. njeffersonnews.com. The North Jefferson News. 11 Oct. 2010. Web. 01 Apr. 2012. Nemours. “What Are Foster Families?”. kidshealth.org. Kids Health. n.d. 01 Apr. 2012. “What is Foster Care and Why is it Needed?”. co.carver.mn.us. Carver County. 2011. Web. 01 Apr. 2012. Read More