Same-Sex Marriages - Essay Example

?Introduction In the modern society, same sex marriage remains one of the most controversial debates that have divided global opinion along moral andreligious lines. One of the major controversies is based on the effects of same sex marriage on the traditional family set up, consisting of a heterosexual couple. One of the major reasons why same sex marriage is becoming entrenched in liberal societies is the desire to accord all people equal freedoms to pursue happiness in all areas of human endeavor, including marriages and intimate relationships (Wald 384). However, this development has adversely affected the family set up. This paper evaluates how same sex marriages have broken down the general patterns of the family unit. Same Sex Marriages A family is the basic unit of society and it comprises of individuals, related by blood or marriage. Basically family comprises of husband, wife and the children. However, changes in social dynamics such as death, divorce, different sexual preferences and remarriage has created different combinations of families, such as single parent, same sex and blended families. Consequently, the traditional nuclear family is just one of the many types of families in the society. Therefore, the definition of the family has changed and is amorphous, comprising of any group of people living together, protecting each other and supporting one another in life (Wilson 29) From time immemorial, a family, involving the marriage of woman and a man has been an institution that preserves social and cultural values associated with procreation (Wald 383). This implies that a marriage forms the foundation of the values or norms that ensures that human life is transmitted from one generation to the next successfully. In the process, it ensures that the life of the child is nurtured to maturity, inculcating the same values to ensure the perpetuation of the human race. Therefore, it is through heterosexual marriage that the society duly recognizes the association of two individuals charged with the responsibility of transmitting human life, nurturing and protecting it to mature and responsible individuals. It is therefore through institutionalization of heterosexual marriage that the present and future of human race is secured. Hence, heterosexual marriage is the epitome of life and it demonstrates the respect that humanity has for life. Same sex marriage undermines the ability of a relationship to procreate and perpetuate the human race and hence it changes the meaning of a family. In addition, same sex marriage undermines the very essence of the family of withholding and transmitting family values along the generations. According to Meezan and Rauch (104), marriage entails the recognition of a couple’s relationship and their commitment to one another in the public domain. The recognition of heterosexual marriage in the public domain is intended to enforce the reproductive function of the union to protect and promote the well-being of the resulting family. Therefore, in a convectional society, a marriage is not recognized just because it entails a union of two consenting adults, but for the above-mentioned purposes. The recognition and institutionalization of the same sex marriage is primarily motivated by individualism or egoism of the concerned couples and society at large. It is the epitome of selfishness, where the future of human race is sacrificed at the altar of egoism, contrary to the very essence of family. Ordinarily, a family is founded on the purest form of commitment, love and dedication to each other’s welfare. Selfless sharing of both moral and material resources for the benefit of all people involved without reservation forms the foundation of successful family and humanity (Maria et al 1044). It is apparent that same sex marriage, with all its purported benefit of ensuring all people enjoy their happiness falls short of these fundamental requirements. Giving birth to children, parenting and providing for them until they become independent is one of the many ways that self-sacrifice is demonstrated in a normal family set up. One of the major affronts of same sex marriage to heterosexual union is the apparent lack of procreation. According to Brewaeys, et al (207), couples in same sex marriages become parents in several ways, including adoption, through a prior heterosexual relationship and thorough donor insemination and surrogate parenting. The uncommon nature of getting children among the heterosexuals is a clear demonstration of their egoism, in spite of possessing the ability to give birth to children of their own. Natural birth, one of the major defining characteristics of heterosexual marriage involves sacrifice and pain to the couple, until the baby is delivered at the end of gestation period. This natural process does not only promote family bonding between the concerned parties but it creates firm foundation for establishing a long-term commitment to each other in the family (Wald 396). To same sex couples, parenthood is difficult and hence they prefer the lesser channels of parenting. This is demonstrated by their strong inclination of preferring the artificial mechanisms of getting children that are less demanding. The magnanimity of heterosexual couples in upbringing of their children is apparent and is demonstrated by their willingness to nurture all types of their offspring. In the natural birth process, sometimes children are born with birth deformities that not only limit their lifespan but demand high attention and care from their parents. Same sex couples are highly selective of their intended children for adoption, and this demonstrates their lack of willingness to take full parental responsibility. The apparent lack of commitment and unconditional love in same sex relationships denies the family the benefits of longevity and endurance that is common in heterosexual marriages. Numerous research studies indicate that heterosexual relationships are longer lasting than same sex unions. According to Maria et al (1030), the largest majority of heterosexual couples remained married for up to twenty years and even longer. In spite of the many challenges facing modern societies and families, many couples in heterosexual marriages remain married for life. However, most heterosexual unions are temporary and transitory, lasting for short duration (Maria et al 1036). The findings about the relatively short term existence of same sex unions has elicited attention from pro- homosexual groups, who attribute the phenomenon to social oppression of same sex couples by the larger society. a research study conducted by Maria, et al(1045)in Netherlands, one of the most liberal societies for accommodating same sexual relationships established that such unions lasted for an average of one and half years. Besides the lack of long-term commitment to one another, same sex couples have a higher degree of promiscuity than people in heterosexual marriages (Wilson 154). Faithfulness to the other partner is one of the basic tenets of heterosexual marriages and is entrenched in most religions and societies. Currently, promiscuity within every type of relationships is one of the leading causes for divorce and separation (Wilson 163). Same sex unions have a higher level of promiscuity than heterosexual relationships. According to Meezan and Rauch (110), homosexuals have an average of about eight intimate relationships, outside their union. These unions are not limited to same sex partners but heterosexual as well. Any kind of promiscuity in a marriage indicates the breakdown of the family unit and it undermines the trust and commitment to all parties. The high prevalence of sexually transmitted infections among the homosexual community demonstrates that the group is highly promiscuous (Maria et al 1037). Such dangerous sexual behavior exposes their spouses to potentially fatal diseases that profoundly affect all people in the relationship, especially the innocent children. Therefore, same sex marriages are undermining the stability of such families because they perpetuate the spread of the disease that threaten the wellbeing of the other partner and children. The risky sexual behavior of homosexual people does not only increase the spread of sexually transmitted infections but also promotes sexual violence in the relationship. According to Wilson (266), females in homosexual unions experience higher level of intimate sexual violence than those heterosexual relationships. The effect of homosexual couples on the upbringing of their children is another issue that undermines the legitimacy of their families. According to Wald(396), the resulting chaos associated with homosexual unions and the absence of social values deny the children the loving and nurturing environment to encourage their development to morally upright and responsible citizens. Research on the effects of homosexual parents on the upbringing children continues eliciting mixed reactions from people across the divide. However, the social, legal and economic challenges that same sex couples face has definite impacts on their children upbringing. In an open society where all children attend common educational institutions irrespective of their parental sexual orientation, the social abhorrence of homosexuality in most communities exposes such children to ridicule, harassment or rejection from their peers. Although this behavior amounts to discrimination, it is hazardous to the children because they suffer innocently from problems that are not out of their own making. The continuous illegalization of same sex marriages in most societies denies same sex couple important benefits that their heterosexual counterparts enjoy in the society. Unfortunately, the impacts of these legal injunctions affect the upbringing of the children under the care of homosexual parents. For instance, homosexual couples are denied accessing their partners benefits, such as health insurance and in case separation, there are divorce settlement claims. Children growing under such environment experience more challenges than those in legalized marriages (Wald 408) Conclusion To the family unit, same sex marriage is a risky social experiment that presents potential dangers to all parties involved. Children are most vulnerable and their inability to make their own decisions in a family setting increases their susceptibility to psychological and physical abuse. Same sex unions do not contribute to procreation and the associated low level of commitment between the partners and high promiscuity rates present imminent biological and social dangers to the society and the family in the short and in the long-term. In a heterosexual family unit that has been traditionally founded on a long term commitment to each other and unconditional love, the emergence of same sexual marriages with its characteristic individualism is a perfect recipe for disintegration of this important and basic social unit. Works Cited Brewaeys, Anne et al. “Donor Insemination: Child Development and Family Functioning in Lesbian Mother Families.” Human Reproduction 12.6(1997): 1345-55. Maria, Xiridou. et al. “The Contribution of the Steady and Causal Partnership to the Incidence of HIV Infection among Homosexual Men in Amsterdam.” AIDS17 (2003):1032-37. Meezan, William and Rauch Jonathan. “Gay Marriage, Same Sex Parenting and America’s Children.” The Future of Children, 15.2(2005): 95-114. Wald, Michael. “Adults Sexual Orientation and State Determinations Regarding Placement of Children.” Family Law Quaternary 40(2006):380-410. Wilson, James. The Marriage Problem: How Our Culture Has Weakened Families. New York: Harper Collins, 2002. Read More