The Subject of Gay Marriage in the United States - Essay Example

The of gay marriage in the United s has caused a lot of controversy over recent years, and the country still seems deeply divided on the issue. Many gay people and liberals argue that it is not fair to exclude long-term and loyal homosexual partners from the legal benefits and social esteem that marriage brings. On the other side of the argument, many conservatives and people of strong religious beliefs argue that marriage is a sacred institution reserved for a man and a woman, and designed primarily to bring up children.

These are the two opposites of the debate, but many people fall somewhere between the two, arguing for example that some form of civil partnership should be legal, with almost the same rights as marriage, but the term marriage should be reserved for a male and female couple. When looking at this question it is important to consider the context in which American citizens are holding this debate. We live in a pluralistic society, and indeed it is a much-loved part of our constitution that people should be free to live and behave according to their conscience, regardless of religion, race, gender, or any other factor that sets one person against another.

Christians, Jewish people, Muslims Hindus, atheists, and people who believe in many more religions are free to live out their own beliefs and we defend this right to the point of the war. In religion, we do not agree about many things, but we respect our differences, and we each follow our inherited traditions, without trying to prove that other people are in the wrong. The difficulty with the whole gay marriage debate is that most people do not consider the issue of marriage so much as the issue of gayness, and the conservatives wish to impose their views and lifestyle upon gay people.

A person who cannot accept homosexuality as a valid lifestyle choice is unlikely ever to accept the prospect of legal gay marriage. From such a starting position, a person cannot be open to persuasion or entreaty. Any increase in the rights of gay people will be interpreted as a backward step, and a danger to the young, even though there is no evidence that this is so. Likewise, a radical gay activist who campaigns outside churches for the right to marry in the church can display intolerance of the faith of others, and can rightly be accused of provoking discord and offending people because of their genuinely held convictions.

What this means is that “Supporters, as well as opponents of same-sex marriage, are usually driven by their normative precommitments, and not by the facts or the lessons of experience” (Eskridge, and Spedale, 2006, p. 205) One way to resolve this head to head struggle is simply to accept that Americans cannot and will not ever agree on this point. Instead of arguing from a pre-programmed tribal standpoint, we should look at the issue of gay marriage as a matter of individual conscience. There are a great many choices that people make in life that do not meet with general approval.

Drinking alcohol, for example, is also condemned by many religious groups, and it has been illegal at various times in American history. Most modern Americans would agree nowadays, however, that drinking alcohol is a leisure activity like many others, and that adult individuals should make their own moral choice on the matter. It is acceptable to legislate for such matters when it comes to children, or in instances such as drug usage where there is clear evidence of physical harm. It is not acceptable, however, to legislate differently for adults who want to make their own decisions on private and personal relationships.

We need to remind ourselves that all human societies evolve. From generation to generation people change their views and their behaviors: what was normal social behavior in 1925 looks quaint and ridiculous in 2001. As society has become more aware of civil rights, including gender, race, and class, so it has also come to appreciate the aspirations of gay people to be treated with the same respect as everyone else. Evidence from more liberal countries in Scandinavia has shown that allowing gay people to marry creates more stable homes, better links between parents and children, and societal harmony despite different positions on homosexuality in general.

(Eskridge and Spedale, 2006). We cannot see these benefits in America because we are clinging to a traditional model no longer suits all Americans. For those who wish to hold on to their traditional views, gay marriage is no threat. It will not affect them, but it will bring great joy to gay people who only wish to deepen their commitment and celebrate their love just like everyone else. For this reason, gay and straight people should have the same rights, including marriage, and be free to choose their futures without an authoritarian state deciding things on their behalf.